Donald Trump’s looking to upgrade America’s infrastructure. Here’s my guess as to what construction projects are on his list:

World’s smallest park, one blade of grass. That’s all the EPA will have jurisdiction over.

1) Finish the Crazy Horse Memorial as a warning of the dangers of unregulated immigration.

2) Create highway markers pointing out the Intercontinental Railroad, which – until now – only Obama had been able to find.

3) One open-pit coal mine bigger than the Grand Canyon – cheap electricity at last! No, two! Cheaper!

4) Following the success of southern wall, build one to protect our western border, too. Not sure which side of Cali to build it on yet.

5) Hedge maze outside the exit door to the UN. Ends at the East River. After passing through the concrete life jacket station.

6) Statue of Liberty gets robotics upgrade and torch is replaced by fully functional upscaled AR-15. Don’t mess with the Liberdroid!

7) Pink tent desert city prison camp for new Border Patrol chief Joe Arpaio. Come for the stale bread, stay for the ditch diggin’.

8) Giant factory where you can get the ‘k’ on your “Make America Great Again” hat changed to a ‘d’. Don’t worry, it’ll be ready by 2020.

9) World’s smallest violin. Democrats will be hearing that one play a LOT.

10) A storage area for radioactive waste. Or the new Iranian embassy. Depending on who’s asking.

Anything else Trump will be building?