… S’morea sticks I never took out, a children’s fishing pole, first aid kit, jumper cables and a tow chain, bag of sand, snow shovel, a few toys, petrified chicken nuggets from a happy meal, and a bag of clothes that I will totally get around to donating to goodwill.
Awkward… If you have Hoffa, who’s buried in my trunk under all the muddy clothes, old trail mix, random pages of kids magazines and granola bar wrappers?! I never should have trusted that handwritten “Letter of Authenticity” I got from the man at the garage sale. His accent was very convincing.
Props for SLotD captions: A sh*tload of dimes, Materials for a large wooden badger, a Vicious Chicken of Bristol costume, a Shrubbery, The Holy Handgrenade of Antioch, Aliens (but don’t tell anyone), A nuke the moon sign, Folgers Crystals and a plaid lumberjack jacket.
Props for SLotD captions: A sh!tload of dimes, Materials for a large wooden badger, a Vicious Chicken of Bristol costume, a Shrubbery, The Holy Handgrenade of Antioch, Aliens (but don’t tell anyone), A nuke the moon sign, Folgers Crystals and a plaid lumberjack jacket.
“Nothing at all, officer. You don’t even need to look back there, because you won’t find anything. No non-native fruit or vegetables, no drugs of any kind. Nope, not a single machine gun, no explosives or radioactive material. That strange noise? Nah, no endangered animals or dead bodies stuffed into suitcases… Huh? Ayuda…what? Illegal immigrants? Don’t be ridiculous.”
Shoulda’ asked me yesterday. Bag of Deer corn, 2 bags birdseed, cordless drill, batteries
bits, box of small misc. items, duct tape and a half empty bottle of chloroform. Never mind that last part.
Parts of a slayer exciter, a Hoppe’s kit, a bike stand, a jacket, some forsner bits, some exterior bulbs, rope, a tarp, the rest is a more eclectic mix of stuff.
…something I scraped off the road this morning. I think it’s DamnCat.
Empty RC cans and Moon Pie wrappers. Just like Billy Joe McCallister.
Actually, he was “clean”, but we had just nabbed him for littering…
Hold on, lemme “tidy up” a bit first.
…rust holes, or as the ViceGrip Garage guy says: “Weight Reduction”.
Bag of dirt, cardboard boxes, and a putter.
…things that help the car-go.
Shell casings and empty bourbon bottles
… S’morea sticks I never took out, a children’s fishing pole, first aid kit, jumper cables and a tow chain, bag of sand, snow shovel, a few toys, petrified chicken nuggets from a happy meal, and a bag of clothes that I will totally get around to donating to goodwill.
Jimmy Hoffa
Awkward… If you have Hoffa, who’s buried in my trunk under all the muddy clothes, old trail mix, random pages of kids magazines and granola bar wrappers?! I never should have trusted that handwritten “Letter of Authenticity” I got from the man at the garage sale. His accent was very convincing.
Props for SLotD captions: A sh*tload of dimes, Materials for a large wooden badger, a Vicious Chicken of Bristol costume, a Shrubbery, The Holy Handgrenade of Antioch, Aliens (but don’t tell anyone), A nuke the moon sign, Folgers Crystals and a plaid lumberjack jacket.
Props for SLotD captions: A sh!tload of dimes, Materials for a large wooden badger, a Vicious Chicken of Bristol costume, a Shrubbery, The Holy Handgrenade of Antioch, Aliens (but don’t tell anyone), A nuke the moon sign, Folgers Crystals and a plaid lumberjack jacket.
If we looked in the cargo area of your vehicle right now, we’d find…
you will need a warrant first.
If we looked in the cargo area of your vehicle right now, we’d find…
a box. Do NOT open it.
Do you know if there is a live cat in it or not?
What’s in the boooooooox?
If we looked in the cargo area of your vehicle right now, we’d find…
Alfred Garcia.
You will be well compensated.
If we looked in the cargo area of your vehicle right now, we’d find…
hehehehe, Oh you’ll find something all right. Go ahead. Hehehehehe…
If we looked in the cargo area of your vehicle right now, we’d find…
well I’m not saying it will be Aliens but… it will be Aliens.
… some guy who said his name was “Clutch”…
Clutch Cargo huh?
… gifts for the cultists…
… a specimen cup…
… a sack full of reusable grocery bags that I don’t get to use anymore…
“Nothing at all, officer. You don’t even need to look back there, because you won’t find anything. No non-native fruit or vegetables, no drugs of any kind. Nope, not a single machine gun, no explosives or radioactive material. That strange noise? Nah, no endangered animals or dead bodies stuffed into suitcases… Huh? Ayuda…what? Illegal immigrants? Don’t be ridiculous.”
…a large green upholstered chair, a fake cast and a bottle of lotion.
…acquaintances of Dexter.
Prince Albert. And a can.
Shoulda’ asked me yesterday. Bag of Deer corn, 2 bags birdseed, cordless drill, batteries
bits, box of small misc. items, duct tape and a half empty bottle of chloroform. Never mind that last part.
The Comfy Chair, The Soft Cushions and The Rack
Didn’t expect that.
…you know all those socks you lost in the dryer? I suspect a wormhole is involved.
If we looked in the cargo area of your vehicle right now, we’d find…
Oh… You don’t wanna look in there.
If we looked in the cargo area of your vehicle right now, we’d find…
lots of shorts.
Parts of a slayer exciter, a Hoppe’s kit, a bike stand, a jacket, some forsner bits, some exterior bulbs, rope, a tarp, the rest is a more eclectic mix of stuff.
If we looked in the cargo area of your vehicle right now, we’d find…
Fifteen schnitzengruben, which is my limit as well as the legal limit in the state of Alaska.
Your body bag.
Stay out of my vehicle!