(That’s me on the stairs, in both security cam photos.)

(That’s my high-quality PhotoShop work for IMAO, too.)

It’s a good place to work, if you like interns.

Maybe she reminds me of a teacher I once had; I don’t know.

Politically, she’s repugnant. Yet I’d still like to — let’s say — quiet her.

“This just in. And then out.”

.

You can bet those top two buttons were buttoned before I got into the room

“Oppo, honestly, honey, Oh no! Oh, no!

“Mmm!

“You are just wayyyyy, way too large! You are more man than even I can handle! My fingers aren’t big enough! This is ridiculous. This is beyond belief!

Opppppooooooooooooooooooo You’re the . . . . . . .

“Aiyyeeee!”

“Let me catch my breath . . . again . . . Oppo. Thank you.”

“Oppo, will you call me?”

(Now try to get that Rolling Stones tune out of your head.)

.

The point here is, I feel kind of bad for Walrus, because in the course of his everyday posting and whatnot, he necessarily comes across the Photo Gallery where I, Oppo, have incidentally stored photos.

But it does not tell him how they are to be used, what post they will be used in, or what captions or titles will accompany them. It is all a mystery until the post appears.

It’s gotta be frustrating.

Some photos are going to be obvious: Mary Ann from Gilligan’s Island, for instance. But others, I know, are so out of left field that he has to wonder “What the actual hell is this going to illustrate?”

They really should provide a way to follow a photo to a post.

This would all be irritating to even the meanest intellect, which we all know Walrus is not.

And now, back to that song in your head:

Please allow me to introduce myself
I’m a man of wealth and taste
I’ve been around for a long, long year
Stole many a man’s soul and faith
And I was ’round when Jesus Christ
Had his moment of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that Pilate
Washed his hands and sealed his fate

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
But what’s puzzling you
Is the nature of my game

Stuck around St. Petersburg
When I saw it was a time for a change
Killed the Czar and his ministers
Anastasia screamed in vain
I rode a tank, held a general’s rank
When the Blitzkrieg raged and the bodies stank

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
Oh, yeah
Ah, what’s puzzling you
Is the nature of my game
Oh, yeah

I watched with glee while your kings and queens
Fought for ten decades for the gods they made
I shouted out, “Who killed the Kennedys?”
Well, after all, it was you and me
Let me please introduce myself
I’m a man of wealth and taste
And I laid traps for troubadours
Who get killed before they reach Bombay

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
Oh, yeah
But what’s puzzling you
Is the nature of my game
Oh, yeah
A-get down, baby

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
Oh, yeah
But what’s confusing you
Is just the nature of my game
Mm, yeah

Just as every cop is a criminal
And all the sinners saints
As heads is tails, just call me Lucifer
‘Cause I’m in need of some restraint
So if you meet me, have some courtesy
Have some sympathy and some taste
Use all your well-learned politesse
Or I’ll lay your soul to waste, mm, yeah

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
Mm, yeah
But what’s puzzling you
Is the nature of my game
Mean it
Get down

Woo-hoo
Ah, yeah
Get on down
Oh, yeah
Mm
Bum, ba-bum, bum, bum, ba-bum
Ba-bum, bum, bum, ba-bum
Bum, ba-bum, bum, bum, ba-bum
Bum, dum, bum, bum, ba-dum, da
Yeah
Ah, yeah

Tell me, baby, what’s my name?
Tell me, honey, can you guess my name?
Tell me, baby, what’s my name?
I’ll tell you one time, you’re to blame
Ooh-hoo, ooh-hoo
Ooh-hoo, alright
Ooh-hoo-hoo, ooh-hoo-hoo
Ooh-hoo-hoo, ah, yeah
Ooh-hoo-hoo, ooh-hoo-hoo
Ah yes, what’s my name?
Tell me, baby, what’s my name?
Tell me, sweetie, what’s my name?

Ooh-hoo-hoo, ooh-hoo-hoo
Ooh-hoo-hoo, ooh-hoo-hoo
Ooh-hoo-hoo, ooh-hoo-hoo
Ooh-hoo-hoo, ah, yeah

It starts off with a lark:

Star Trek: Re — booted!

Mistress Spock:

Oppo is apparently going through some serious issues now. Pray for Oppo.