Woty from Nigeria asks:
Are there ever going to be more nuke the moon shirts?
I’m sorry, Timmy, but there aren’t any plans for more Nuke the Moon t-shirts right now. Because of their high quality, there is a minimal amount that can be made at once, and I’m not sure I could sell that many more.
But there are still a number of my new shirt design left. Buy now, before they’re all gone! Now!
Ford from Flint, Michigan writes:
Usama seems to like to release audio recordings and videos. Do you think it’s just a matter of time before he releases a video game?
That’s certainly possible. Wow! What would I do if buying videogames supported terrorism? I’d have to choose between my own pleasure and supporting evil. Now I know how drug users feel.
Adam from Utah (only for as long as is absolutely imperative) writes:
My sister married a hippie and becomes more and more liberal by the day. I don’t know what angers me more, the fact that the so-called “higher education” system helped make her this way or that she currently teaches french and infects young high school minds with the same worthless filth every day. What should I do?
Well, in our superior culture, we don’t support honor killings of your sister, so you’ll have to handle the problem in a more subtle way. If my sister were liberal, I’d hit her with a stick (you hear that Sarah; if Hollywood turns you liberals, prepare for a stick hitting). Instead, you could use a painful, high-pitch signal each time she makes a liberal statement to try and train her. Also, you could hold her eyes up open while forcing her to watch images of French cowardice while Beethoven music plays. Whatever works.
Savannah McClelland from Lake Worth, FL writes:
My step-dad is a liberal. My mother is a conservative. They argue a lot, and it’s really difficult for me to deal with. You see, secretly, I’m a conservative myself, but I feel really bad always backing up my Mom. Kind of guilty, too. I mean my step-dad is nice and all; is it really his fault he’s wrong? The other day, my Mom found a high-powered hose, because my step-dad was chanting “Hell no, we won’t go!” and you know what, he still hasn’t recovered. But I did hear him say,”mumble mumble mumble neocon mumble…” as the ambulance was carrying him away. What should I do?
Wow! Are you related to Scott?
Hmm, seems like a lot of people are having problem with liberals in their families. My parents never allowed any liberals in ours, but I guess I was lucky. As for your situation, I guess you can’t break his kneecaps, because there’s like a Commandment saying you have to honor your mother and father, and it might also apply to step-dads (if you run into Jesus, have him confirm this). Hitting him with the high-powered hose was a good start, but more is needed. What I think there really needs to be is a support group for people with liberals in their family and a hotline you can call for advice. Someone give me millions of dollars and I’ll get that started nationwide.
Alex from Ye Olde England writes:
Greetings from the UK – I’m at College at the moment and am having to make a big decision – do I join a military/police reserve unit and do my bit for the War on Terrorism, or do I keep on writing right wing articles for my college magazine/generally disrupting commie activities on Campus (which I wouldn’t have time for and wouldn’t be allowed to due to regulations if I did join up)?
I’d say join. If you don’t get in the military and kill terrorists, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life. Plus, since you live in England, it will be like your only chance to fire a gun.
Jamie R. Jacoby from Hunt, TX writes:
I went to see “The Last Samurai” and the ninjas really scared me. Have you seen it or is the thought of really scary ninjas just to overwhelming for you?
Of course I saw that movie. There is no reason to be sacred of ninjas when samurai are about. That’s why you don’t need to be afraid of ninjas when I’m around. Hai!
Lou Windsor from the military writes:
A few of us military guys have a question:
After a long day of ruling the world, we like to relax like the next guy. Should we drink a beer and risk getting a bit bloated, or should we stick with the bourbon?
Also, as a follow up question:
Cluster bombs or frags?
I think our military men and women deserve bourbon, so stick with that. Actually, I’ll donate money towards it (I’ll funnel it out of the money for the support line for people with liberals in their family; don’t tell anyone).
As for your second questions, I’d pick cluster bombing the enemy over fragging your superior officer.

Please keep the questions coming, <a href=”mailto:THISISSPAMTHISISSPAMace you’re from, I’ll randomly select one.