With the column in the NYPost and working on books for HarperCollins, I feel like I’ve recently leveled up as a writer. Maybe twice.
I have decided in my Twitter profile to now remove the “semi-pro” from before “humorist.”
Boston has a nice downtown, but it doesn’t have enough densely packed skyscrapers to support a Spider-man.
I think I hate Romney now. I don’t know if I can tolerate him anymore.
So Romney’s strategy is to distinguish himself as the defender of status quo?
Rick Perry wants to assure you that if you think you can buy him for $5000, it will cost more than that.
Instead of being angry at him, we should ask ourselves what did we do to cause Ron Paul.
I don’t think we’ll have a very good president in 2013, but hopefully at least a better one.
New slogan for upcoming election:
Anybody but RonPaul!!1! or Obamanation.
I’m depressed now.
It’s past time to drop the “semi.” I’ve been reading you since 2003. You’ve paid your dues
It would be hard not to get a better president in 2013, although if the price of getting a better president is Romney, I am afraid it will be a hard lesson in the size of the gulf between better and good.
I just hope that Rick Perry does not give us the same lesson.
History has taught me to keep my expectations low for government and politicians. Low expectations should be a good thing though. The less a politician does, the better off we are.
Many people believe that Gotham City is modeled after Boston. But if that were true every movie would consist entirely of Batman driving around looking for a parking place.
I’m amazed you can travel to Boston and still have random thoughts. Some advice:
When driving in Massachusetts, just remember there are no rules of the road. And, you may die at any time.
Don’t forget to eat some Boston Baked Beans. Then spend some time in the proximity of Democrat politicians.
When visiting Boston, don’t mention their funny accents. There’s something temporarily wrong with your ears.
It’s been my experience that Massachusetts’ companies are low on ethics. So, be careful.
Was it hard to get up this morning and post on your blog for the “little people” after being published in a monster newspaper for like millions of readers? We are are still here being loyal and such but something tells me that we are going to pay for it in the way of extreme insults! That would be excellent!
Hey Jimmy…I’m not “little”, I’m “Vertically Challenged”.
Do any of the Paultards realize that Congress has to go along with him to do any of the great libertarian stuff he wants? The tragedy of a RONPAUL!!!1! presidency would be that the only accomplishment would be in foreign policy which the Pres can do without much ‘help’ from COngress.
I’m sure Tel Aviv would feel nice and safe with that.
Expect to see some RONPAUL!!!!11!! signs at your next Arab spring protest demonstration.
romney is just obama with better hair.
RonPaul! is a singularity
I have reached critical mass as far as this group of posers, posturers and pretenders goes. There isn’t a candidate in the field who would make a barnacle of the backside of Ronald Reagan’s horse. While there are one or two who have, at least, more experience in government and even less who have actual real world business experience the rest aren’t worth the powder and shot to blow them to the nearest street corner and back.
Seriously, when are these nimrods going to face the REAL problems and come up with REAL solutions or at least some decent suggestions besides tax cuts and killing social security and since I’ve brought up the whale in the living room, just what are these anti social security types going to do with hundreds of thousands of old people with no money?
(Sarc on)I know, the government should take a page from planned Parenthood founder Margaret Sanger and euthanize anyone older than 65, those non-producers. After all these folks don’t do anything worth while, they cost the earth to keep alive and they’re contributing to global warming. Just think of all the “greeter jobs” at Wal-Mart that can go to illegals and teenagers. You might even give people the opportunity (for a hefty fee ) to “Throw Grandma from the Train”. It could be a new reality program, “The Last Gasp” or “Rest in Pieces”.
(how sad is it that I have to identify sarcasm due in part to the fact that some people might take this as a real suggestion…………..sigh)
Ah. Taking potshots at Perry, your soon to be nominee? Is it that you know, in your heart of hearts, that he is an empty suit, beholden to corporate interests, without a brain or soul? And there might be a skeleton or two, along with a bunch of shiny suits, in his closet?
Do not let that stop you. Remember that he is pro-gun! Pro-killing as many criminals as possible (guilty or not)! For states rights! Social Security is a Monstrous life! The Fed Chairman is a traitor who should be tarred and feathered! Climate Change is a conspiracy by evil scientists seeking to secure first-class junkets to Greenland to drill for ice-core samples!
That is grade-A prime wingnut red meat there. Don’t pretend you can turn up your nose at that!
rick perry, romney, and absama are just inter-changeable barbie doll dresses. God help us.
rick perry’s stance on illegals alone prevents him from being an American. send absama back to kenya and rickie with him.
romney has nicer hair than edwards, but he has grey on the sides, so he is not presidential.
What ron paul says makes sense, I just wish he would stop jumping around when he says it.
Is new york still a state? Does traveling in the eastern bloc invalidate your American citizenship? Can a real American write for the lsm and not be considered a hippy? If Frnak goes main stream, will he re-think nuking the moon? Enquiring minds want to know!
seanmahair – I’m still wondering why anyone would want to be the next President.
IMO, several candidates’ hearts are in the right place (e.g. Bachmann and Cain) but lately I’m also worried about the temperament needed in the next President. I don’t think the next one will have time for golf, IYKWIMAITYD.
(Now, having refreshed this page and seeing Monkey Faced Liberal show up here after a long hiatus, I’m reluctant to click the Submit Comment button… oh, thanks plentyobailouts… I’d rather my comment follow yours!)
Monkey Faced Liberal: You’re a hopeless, clusterduck of a miserable cynic. Bag it.
As much as I hate to admit it, I have to agree with Monkey Face. It would be morally reprehensible to support any presidential candidate that had ties to big corporations such as Solyndra, Solexel, or GE just because they bundle a potfull of money for your campaign. Or one that is so pro-gun that their policies would make automatic weapons easily available for Mexican drug-cartels. Or one that is so anti-science that he’d shut down NASA or claim that once science is settled then no more questions may be asked! Or one that was so concerned with his own ego that he’d punt hard decisions to his cabal in Congress rather than have to make potentially unpopular decisions. Or one that would get us into two more needless
kinetic military actionswars in as many years of their disasterous term.Oh good, Monkey Faced Troll is back!!! Fun!
You’re right MFL, the debate was embarrassing. One candidate is having an affair with a woman who had his child while still married to his wife who is dieing of cancer and made millions of dollars with phony lawsuits.
The next candidate was a woman with a disapproval rate of over 50 percent, who is constantly surrounded by scandals, never accomplished a thing in the private or public sector, and is married to the most scandalous president in history.
And, the last candidate is a full-blown socialist, backed by George Soros, who never held any job whatsoever in his 47 years and may not even be eligible to legally be president, and who never says what he’s going to do other than “fundamentally transform” the greatest country on the planet using “Hope” and “Change.”
You’re right, what a pathetic field of candidates for president…none of which are qualified to be hired to work in McDonalds, let alone be president.
…oh, wait…you mean last night’s debate? Well, in that case, other than Ron Paul and Jon Huntsman, any of those candidates would be excellent alternative to what we’ve got now.
MFL needs to get an avatar. Maybe a barrel of fish?
Ron Paul is a monkey wrench. He’ll tighten the nuts and widely screech excessive government to a halt if it is within his power. Combining Frank’s above post with his explicit preference for a bag of wrenches for president, I think he’s leaning Ron Paul. Prove me wrong, Frank! Me thinks crazy’s your cup o’ noodles.
Ya know what Frank…I’m sick of this. if you want to endorse your candidate, that’s fine. You pay the bandwidth on your site, it’s your dime. But I think it’s about time for this longtime loyal reader to mosey on out of here. Every time, I’m on here looking for a good laugh against or Obama, or clever witty one-liners, you’re just bashing Romney. Frankly, I don’t see what all the fuss is about. I don’t see a better candidate. You want to pick Perry fine. But I ask you this honest question. Why?
There’s no doubt that they have different positions on specific issues. While Perry seems more conservative (though I think less prudent) on social security, Mitt is more conservative on immigration. Regarding health care, their Obamacare position is virtually identical, and they both advanced state-level programs that are problematic to many conservatives. At least Mitt’s health care plan passed with bipartisan support after extensive consultations with leading conservative think tanks. Perry’s HPV mandate was an exercise of pure executive power, then he went on to demonize his opponents when they reacted against a decision that was, frankly, authoritarian. Not to mention the frightening implications of Merck’s financial gains.
Even their pasts are similar. Yes, Mitt has the YouTubes from his debates with Ted Kennedy, but Perry campaigned for Al Gore. Mitt is a pro-life convert, but Perry endorsed a pro-choice candidate for president in 2008.
On foreign policy, I’m having trouble determining where Perry stands. His answer on Afghanistan was incoherent (how do you pull out and maintain a presence at the same time?), but I’m not sure that there’s a huge difference between the governors. It’s hard to imagine either of them doing what Obama is doing now in Iraq and Afghanistan — defying the generals to rush a drawdown in time for 2012.
Or is it style over substance? Texans just seem more conservative, don’t they? But y’all, an accent doesn’t make you conservative.
Mitt Romney and Rick Perry are both conservative, both would give Barack Obama the run of his life, and both are capable of pulling America back from the brink. But it’s simply not the case that conservatives are compromising if they choose the former governor of Massachusetts over the current governor of Texas.
So I’m out of here Frank. I’m just tired of seeing my fellow Republicans bashed on a supposedly conservative blog.
Maybe the reason Monkey Faced Liberal lurks here is a secret desire to be a Clean Shaven Conservative!
@seanmahair # 12: Hurling Day! Anybody else here old enough to remember the Muppet “Dinosaurs” show? The dinos had the rule you suggest: When older dinos reached a certain age, they were hurled off a cliff to their deaths. The Dad of the dino family, Earl, was filled with unholy glee when his mother-in-law’s Hurling Day came around. As he explained to his wife, “I married YOU so that I could hurl HER.” In an uncharacteristically conservative outcome for this otherwise preachily liberal show (Earl worked for an environmentally incorrect redwood logging company called “Wesayso,” and his hateful boss was named B.P. Richfield), individual lives were agreed to have intrinsic worth, and Grandma Ethyl (hee!) was spared, despite being wheelchair-bound and completely nonproductive.
I don’t think the libs will need anything as direct as Hurling Day – they will rely on social pressure. It is only a matter of time before the Right to Die with dignity becomes the Obligation to Die before you become a “burden.” Survival is politically incorrect. (Personally, my goal in life is to become a burden on society. Women in my family live into their nineties if they smoke, their hundreds if they don’t smoke. I don’t smoke.)
how do you pull out and maintain a presence at the same time?
hehe – it’s tricky, but all about the timing
Trivia: In Boston, St. Patrick’s Day is also known as Hurling Day.
If Frank is in Boston he better watch for drunk democrats driving around, especailly near bridges.
@PoliticalDan – Lighten up, Francis.
WOW!!! Frank must have hit the big tiime!!! Troll city today!!! Fun times!!! Romney is a mormon and should be disqualified for that reason alone! Perry was a cheer leader and should not be able to run because of that. Ron Paul is insane…well, so is everyone else in congress so I guess he get’s to stay. Michelle Bachmann is a total Conservative Babe…she’s in!!!
Oh, ussjimmycarter, you ignorant slüt.
Mormonism doesn’t disqualify someone from being fully qualified to be elected President.
I’m gonna turn seanmahair loose on you!!
Magic Underwear does in my book! Every time!!!
While in Boston, you may wish to walk the Hippie Punching Trail in Cambridge. Don’t worry about actually finding the trail; any sidewalk will do.
And I see that you added “super” before “genius.”
“Magic Underwear??” I haven’t got a clue what that means. Are they like magic beans, ussjc?
It sounds like what you get when you smoke those giant, Minnesota mosquito horns.
Oh I know. Maybe I need to go to the 99¢ store and by a bag of Righteous Indignation. Then I would understand, I bet.
But there are some religions I will not entertain in a candidate, however:
1.) Islam *
2.) The Church of Anthropomorphic Global Warming *
3.) The Church of Lord Keynes *
4.) The Church of Progressivism or any of its Liberal sects *
* Not a religion but included for the sake of argument.
The Boston Common was the site of many public executions and musket-junkings. And you have got to do the freedom trail, and check out the aquarium. It’s not the biggest in the world, but it is the awesomest. Gotta admit, Massachusetts has a glorious past, if you ignore the present.
While magic underwear does disqualify you from being President, it’s good for some great pick-up lines.
If everybody is so damned unhappy with the current slate of candidates, why not start a groundswell to get Gary Johnson and Thaddeus McCotter in the debates. Perhaps they can alternate with nowhere men like Huntsman & Santorum.
Why McCotter?
* He has no baggage.
* He is a conservative, but not a nutjob and not establishment.
* He is a serving Congressman.
* He is Lincolnesque.
* Instead of jawing about Social Security, he just submitted an actual bill (endorsed by Peter Ferrara).
* He is witty.
* He plays rock guitar.
Why not McCotter?
* He has almost no hair – hard to compete with great hair.
* Unlike Sarah Palin, he is not all that much to look at.
McCotter should go on Jay Leno and jam with the band.
It did wonders for Bill Clinton’s campaign back in the day, and guitars are way cooler than saxophones.