While talking with Univision, Obama said, “The most important lesson I’ve learned is you can’t change Washington from the inside.” So the most important lesson he learned is that is whole “Change!” slogan was naive malarkey? I guess that’s something worth learning.

Anyway, I don’t want to take him out of context, so here’s the transcript of the entire exchange:

The most important lesson I’ve learned is you can’t change Washington from the inside. I mean, I’ve tried to do stuff, but it’s like super hard and really tiring and people yell at me and I’m like, “Oh man; I don’t know what I’m doing.” Like I tried to make jobs — sort of — but I don’t really get how you do that from government. Like, I suggested maybe we hire another janitor at the White House, but that’s only like one job. I guess to make lots of jobs, you need to like make a business, but that involves numbers and stuff and I hate those. So, it’s like I can’t do anything as president but play golf — which I really like because it’s quiet out there and people don’t yell at me. I think I’m just going to play golf in my next term and stop trying to do stuff, because stuff is hard.

Now don’t misunderstand me; I don’t want this to be like when people didn’t understand my “you didn’t build that” statement. What I was trying to say there is that you can’t build things and if you said so you’re a liar. What builds things is a giant with a fish head that has magical iron hands. You understand? You don’t look like you understand. Sorry, I’ve been hitting the choom a bit lately and I might be a bit confused. I think I need to lay down.

[Obama gets down from chair and lies on ground]

Presidenting is hard. It’s makes me sleepy. And hungry. Can someone make a burrito run? You’re like all Latino; someone has to know where to get a good burrito. Taco Bell is fine, though. I’m so tired, though. I’m going to take a nap. Can someone tell me how smart I am? It helps me go to sleep.

Man, he needs to stick to a teleprompter.