How Much Money Americans Have in Their Savings Accounts—Nearly Half Have Less Than $500
CNBC | 1/24/2024
Have they checked the value of their bottle returns?
Nearly half of Americans have $500 or less in their savings accounts, an amount that leaves them vulnerable to unexpected expenses, . . .
. . . like buying a McDonald’s meal for three . . .
. . . according to a GOBankingRates survey of 1,063 U.S. adults conducted in November 2023.
About 29% of respondents have between $501 and $5,000 in their savings accounts, while the remaining 21% of Americans have $5,001 or more.
21%? Are you pulling my leg? They’ll never be able to support the rest.
Few hold much cash in their checking accounts as well. Of those surveyed, 60% report having $500 or less in their checking accounts, while only about 12% have $2,001 or more.
So how do they pay their monthly bills?
The lack of cash in either savings or checking accounts suggests that many Americans are living paycheck to paycheck. This leaves them vulnerable to unexpected expenses, underscoring the importance of having an emergency fund, if they’re able to build one.
Just emu [sic] -lating the president and Congress, I guess.
I pick up each penny I come across – you’ve got to have a solid retirement plan…
Biden: “Once we put garage sales under the capital gains umbrella we will be able to assist Ukraine indefinitely man”.
“No joke: I made millions from foreign governments for what I had in my garage next to my ‘Vette!”
Since You’re Obviously a Financial Genius Compared to These People, How Are You Going To Spread Your Expertise?
And don’t just selfishly think of yourself. What if Hunter wants nose candy? You know the Big Guy gets ten percent.
Since You’re Obviously a Financial Genius Compared to These People, How Are You Going To Spread Your Expertise?
I need a battery powered Sawzall to free catalytic converters.
Since You’re Obviously a Financial Genius Compared to These People, How Are You Going To Spread Your Expertise?
As an hedge against inflation, I need to win the Powerball jackpot
My savings account has over $500 in it, so I made a penny in interest last month. Due to the magic of compound interest, that will accelerate to two cents in just 50 years. I will be a millionaire in another 4 trillion years or so.
If you have more than 5 grand in your savings account you are not investing wisely.
“I’m talking government bonds, Striker. Triple-A rating…”
Plastics!
In these challenging financial times may I suggest…Malt Liquor…
We’re supposed to be spreading our expertise to those who make poor choices, not the other way around.
Since You’re Obviously a Financial Genius Compared to These People, How Are You Going To Spread Your Expertise?
Venmo me $19.95 and I will tell you.
Y’all send me your dollar, soon now.
Since You’re Obviously a Financial Genius Compared to These People, How Are You Going To Spread Your Expertise?
Invest in precious metals. Specifically, lead and brass.
Get a girlfriend with an Only Fans, try not to bleed out from deals gone bad, grow your own hormonally induced boobs, add music to Biden’s gibberish like REM, be uniquely unqualified, not your typical Democrat moron, put all your begs in one basket and get an English to Ukrainian dictionary.
You are a fluke
Of the universe.
You have no right to be here…..
Deteriorata! Deteriorata!
Go placidly
Amid the noise and waste.
And remember what comfort there may be
In owning a piece thereof.
Avoid quiet and passive persons
Unless you are in need of sleep.
Rotate your tires.
Speak glowingly of those greater than yourself
And heed well their advice,
Even though they be turkeys.
Know what to kiss… and when!
Consider that two wrongs never make a right
But that three… do.
Wherever possible, put people on hold.
Be comforted that in the face of all aridity and disillusionment
And despite the changing fortunes of time,
There is always a big future in computer maintenance.
[Chorus]
You are a fluke
Of the universe.
You have no right to be here.
And whether you can hear it or not
The universe is laughing behind your back.
Remember the Pueblo.
Strive at all times to bend, fold, spindle and mutilate.
Know yourself.
If you need help, call the FBI.
Exercise caution in your daily affairs,
Especially with those persons closest to you.
That lemon on your left, for instance.
Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most souls
Would scarcely get your feet wet.
Fall not in love therefore;
It will stick to your face.
Gracefully surrender the things of youth:
The birds, clean air, tuna, Taiwan
And let not the sands of time
Get in your lunch.
Hire people with hooks.
For a good time call 606-4311;
Ask for “Ken.”
Take heart amid the deepening gloom
That your dog is finally getting enough cheese.
And reflect that whatever misfortune may be your lot
It could only be worse in Milwaukee.
[Chorus]
Therefore, make peace with your god
Whatever you conceive him to be-
Hairy thunderer, or cosmic muffin.
With all its hopes, dreams, promises and urban renewal
The world continues to deteriorate.
GIVE UP!
[Chorus]
Nice, but let’s hear the [Chorus], please.
You are a fluke
Of the universe.
You have no right to be here.
And whether you can hear it or not
The universe is laughing behind your back.
Blue Horseshoe likes Anacott Steel