42 Comments

  1. a shower curtain.

    a t-shirt (size XXXL) saying “I’m with stupid.”

    a muumuumuumuu, which is a muumuu squared

    a device around her neck with a button to summon somebody with a bottle of whisky

    a semen-encrusted blue dress – oh, wait, that’s Monica

  2. Hillary showed up to a speaking gig wearing…

    A revamped exoskeleton from a Jeep Wrangler chassis

    Huma’s favorite strap-on

    Designer colostomy bag w/ notification alert

    Cloven hoof FM boots

    The usual cottage cheese thighs

  3. ♩
    … a YOLO ribbon
    She wore it in a tintype that she posed for one day
    And if you asked her why the heck she wore it
    She wore it for her love of power far, far away
    Far away (far away!)
    Far away (far away!)
    She wore it for her cover in Times far, far away.
    ♩

  4. Hillary showed up to a speaking gig
    Wearing
    Lipstick, but still . . . quite big.

    Swaggering, staggering, with a cough
    Coldly, oldly, to the trough
    As real and as red-nosed as Rudolph
    Yelling at Security to just ______ off.

    Another event she had to rig.
    Nobody
    Gives a flying . . . pig.

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