12 pollsters spinning, eleven Panthers scowling, ten reporters lying, nine judges fighting, eight taxman milking (us), seven friends a’stealing, six guns a’walking, FIVE GOLDEN PHONES! Four new excuses, three fund raisers, two lying memoirs, and an economy crushed by a tree.
To get people to vote for him, Obama gave out free hits of crack. He also promised that if elected he will fully implement his new ‘Crack the Rich’ campaign.
…their names to a local ACORN office because, let’s face it, if you’re stupid enough to vote for Obama you’re too stupid or lazy to actually get to the polling place to cast your own vote.
. . . a standing ovation to himself in front of a mirror.
. . . free teleprompters for everyone.
. . . golf lessons to Tiger Woods.
. . . Justin Bieber a breath mint.
. . . a speech in Boston and says he supports the Red Sox, a speech in New York and says he supports the Yankees, a speech in Baltimore and says he supports the Orioles, a speech in . . .
Bacon for Stephen M. St. Onge!
To get people to vote for him, Obama gave… everyone a free quart of unobtanium, which he personally refined from his personal stash of balonium and the gasses he found in the bozone layer of the atmosphere.
…everyone a free cell phone and a two-for-1 coupon from Taco De Perro.
…Frank J a hundred thous… err, a mill… errrrr TEN MILLION DOLLARS!!!!
…each person three puppies but took them back as it was time for the annual white house barbecue.
…..free knee pads and mats for the Morning Calls To Prayer.
To get people to vote for him, Obama gave…himself a BJ
A sharp blow to the head and passed their names on to his “get out the vote” volunteers.
12 pollsters spinning, eleven Panthers scowling, ten reporters lying, nine judges fighting, eight taxman milking (us), seven friends a’stealing, six guns a’walking, FIVE GOLDEN PHONES! Four new excuses, three fund raisers, two lying memoirs, and an economy crushed by a tree.
. . . thirty pieces of silver taken from rich white Rethuglicans.
…Nancy Pelosi a spanking.
. . . out Obamacare waivers.
. . . a free fire extinguisher for each Vote, I mean Volt, purchased.
. . . Democrats outside of Chicago maps to cemeteries.
… dead and imaginary people the right to vote.
…empty promises.
…all the voting Cats free TUNA!
Obama gave… Everyone the day off, a union card, and an “I’m a 47%er” t-shirt.
…interviews to “The View”, “David Letterman”, “Ladies Home Journal”, “TV Guide”, “Highlights” and “The Pennysaver.”
…pot to every chicken.
…his word that he’d pull out.
… everyone a new definition of millionaire: $250,000.
To get people to vote for him, Obama gave… up eating dogs until after the election.
a plastic key to paradise.
“Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring Obamaphone!”
Once heard, it will be stuck in your head like a mouse on a glue trap.
To get people to vote for him, Obama gave out free hits of crack. He also promised that if elected he will fully implement his new ‘Crack the Rich’ campaign.
To get people to vote for him, Obama gave… billions, if not trillions.
To get people to vote for him, Obama gave…everyone free nutrition advice from moochele.
To get people to vote for him, Obama gave…every parasite a department of homeland security credit card and a hooker that was secret service approved.
….out free complimentary day passes to Man’s Country bath house in Chicago.
…your address to a local New Black Panthers chapter.
…people an honest, reasoned discussion of his plans with detailed analysis of actions and results….naahhhh! He gave ’em money!
…their names to a local ACORN office because, let’s face it, if you’re stupid enough to vote for Obama you’re too stupid or lazy to actually get to the polling place to cast your own vote.
…vouchers exempting their children from having to eat Michelle approved school lunches.
To get people to vote for him, Obama gave all of the military ballots to the DNC to fill out.
…Biden a lobotomy. In 2008.
. . . out dog biscuits.
. . . your money to his supporters.
. . . a standing ovation to himself in front of a mirror.
. . . free teleprompters for everyone.
. . . golf lessons to Tiger Woods.
. . . Justin Bieber a breath mint.
. . . a speech in Boston and says he supports the Red Sox, a speech in New York and says he supports the Yankees, a speech in Baltimore and says he supports the Orioles, a speech in . . .
Gave everyone a get out of country free card.
. . . in to his dark side. He now prefers to be called Darth Obama.
A hug from Jim Messina .
Tin foil anti Romney cancer armour.
Dog cookbook.
A copy of his birth certificate.
A prophet Muhammad bobble head.
A hugbox.
An email encouraging people to give him donations from profits weddings/funerals/yard sales/ brothels.
Half of their Social Security because the other half will be used to balance the budget. Besides, they didn’t earn it themselves.
What? I’m the first to say he gave a ‘happy ending’?
Bacon for Stephen M. St. Onge!
To get people to vote for him, Obama gave… everyone a free quart of unobtanium, which he personally refined from his personal stash of balonium and the gasses he found in the bozone layer of the atmosphere.
…free bullets to everyone who refuses vote for him… traveling at 1100 fps.
…up on reality and promised in his second term there really will be unicorns.
…a… Oh look! Shiny!
…retroactive abortions to people who don’t look like Treyvon Martin.
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