If you thought the Iran Deal was bad, well, it seems more like a betrayal. My man in State slipped me some of the details that aren’t being reported in the media:
- President Rouhani has openly begun referring to Obama’s negotiating style as “The Monica.”
- President Rouhani was granted carte blanche use of Obama’s veto power and given the master remote to all the drones.
- John Kerry will now be referred to as Caitlyn and must always wear a hijab in public.
- Reagan’s grave will be moved to Tehran where Ahmedinejad may spit upon it with impunity.
- Iranian officials will be allowed to make anytime/anywhere inspections of US nuclear facilities.
- Israel was declared a nuclear-free zone.
- On college campuses, women may not level charges of date rape without three additional witnesses.
- Progressive restaurant owners will not be allowed to refuse to cater gay hangings.
- The south wall frieze of Mohammad at the Supreme Court will be sandblasted and replaced with a carving of Obama prostrate before the Ayatollah.
- Iran gets first dibs on all Planned Parenthood fetal parts.
- The IRS will now be collecting a flat jizya tax from all non-Muslims on behalf of our Iranian overlords.
- The hostages from the Iranian Hostage Crisis will be returned to Iran.
Israel has need declared a nuclear free zone…until Iran delivers one of its nukes to Israel.
Maybe all that is true, but don’t you just feel safer already?
President Obama handed over his pen and cell phone to President Rouhani.
A mosque will be built under the dome of the capitol building. (Scaffolding is already in place and the project was scheduled o be completed by the end of Ramadan, but being a government project it is late ad over budget.)
On college campuses, women may not level charges of date rape without three additional witnesses.
That would be an improvement over what seems to be the policy on many campuses that the accused is guilty even in the face of convincing exculpatory evidence, such as being in another place at the time.