Voting is the state trying to get your fingerprints on the murder weapon.

According to Exit Polls, people prefer a glowing red sign flush to the wall.

Make sure to UV scan people’s “I Voted” stickers to confirm they’re not counterfeit.

No matter who you vote for, I won’t get angry. I know how horrible the person is you’re voting against.

So we’re all just waiting to see how Bill Mitchell responds when it becomes clear Trump lost? [Ed. Note: Bill Mitchell was right about everything I was very wrong]

I hope the Trump concession speech is epic. No reason to hold back. [Ed. Note: Trump gave a very nice victory speech]

I hope in Hillary’s victory speech she thanks all the people who voted for Trump in the primary since that will be the only reason she won. [Ed. Note: I am an out of touch elitist]

No where in the Constitution does it give the government the right to spend our tax dollars on “I Voted” stickers.

I don’t think any of us are mentally prepared for a Trump win. Like a meteor hitting – possible but don’t think it will actually happen.

As much as I always dreamed of Hillary losing the presidency, I’m scared.

The only winner in all this is Nate Silver.

Apparently there are hidden Trump voters. Some could be in your house right now. Maybe standing right behind you.

You encourage people to go out and vote and this is what happens.

People thought Trump was a plant to get Hillary elected, but what if it’s the other way around?

If Hillary loses, it’s not because of the emails. That’s just a symptom of her huge problems.

The only surviving pundits will be Nate Silver and the Dilbert guy.

What if Bill Mitchell is the only sane one among us?
The ground game was in their hearts! It was!

Can Mexico even afford the wall?

So we’re looking at a Trump presidency with really confused Republican majorities in House and Senate.

What’s gong to happen to the taco trucks?

You Dems weren’t listening much on limiting executive power the past 8 years; want to revisit that?

Let this be a lesson: Whatever power you give the government, remember that one day it will be wielded by a Trump.

“We just weren’t patronizing and smug enough!” -left-wingers right now

It seemed like Trump was about as awful as possible. He just wasn’t more awful than what’s considered normal for D.C.

We had already explained to the kids an awful lady was going to be our next president. I don’t even know how to explain this to them.

Left, right, all skin colors and religions – we’re just going to have to hug it out and get through this, okay?

“One in three of my simulations had this happening.” -Nate Silver to whoever is near him at the sports bar

Trump is the worst man to have ever run for our presidency. He’s apparently not the worst person, though.

I so wanted to gloat on a Hillary loss, but I’m too much in shock. I can’t even imagine what this all means.

I guess we’re not going to get our historic first president who is a spouse of a previous president.

I hope the left is ready for the soul-searching that the GOP is apparently avoiding.

I still don’t even understand how it’s physically possible to take Trump seriously. He’s this 90s novelty act.

Hillary was taking what everyone hates about politicians and then rubbing everyone’s faces in it. Bad gamble.

A lot of talk on what GOP has done wrong to lose all minorities but not a lot of talk on what Dems have done wrong to lose all whites.

We have 4 years ahead of us of talking about Trump and over analyzing the dumb things he says. FOUR YEARS!

The only one who will be able to beat Trump in 2020 will be Kanye West.

We thought Obama would be great for race relations and things got worse. Seems like Trump will be horrible for race relations so maybe…

Despite my best attempts, I’m apparently one of the elites with no idea what’s going on.

An important lesson is that yelling “Bigot!” doesn’t cause white people to magically disappear.

Nate Silver wins the Price Is Right for guessing the closest to Trump’s chances without going over.

Looking at how Trump changed the voting patterns, it’s not clear now that Rubio would have done better or even that he’d have won.

The Dems soul-searching needs to start with figuring out what they’ve done to completely chase away white voters.
A big part of their election strategy has been to put everyone in racial groups with one bad racial group to be the enemy. That can’t stand.

So I’m unemployed as of this week and now Trump is going to be president. I’m in a weird place right now.
BTW, if you some companies in the Austin area who need a software/firmware engineer (with mobile experience) hit me up.

Hopefully Trump can put Nate Silver in his cabinet as his math sorcerer.

Political correctness bullies people into not saying what they think, but it never changes what they think.
Political correctness has become a way to avoid addressing differences, and has thus made us weaker as a united people.

So what’s happening to Trump TV?

The president is terrible. Wait, is Trump president yet? Well, whoever it is, the statement stands.

Every time I’ve checked Twitter today, I’m like “Wait, did that really happen last night?” Hasn’t really sunk in.

In understanding Trump, can we finally all admit that Obama is a mediocre person who was elected for shallow reasons? Yes we can!

The false assumption of leftists is that they’re morally better than the supposed racists and misogynists they sneer at.

Bigots dismissing the concerns of large groups of people – that’s what unites racists and much of the left.

Who knows? Maybe really good things will come of the Trump presidency. We were wrong about everything else so far.