(A Precision Guided Humor Assignment)
Ya just GOTTA figure that – sooner or later – that corrupt, embezzling weasel Kofi Annan will get perp-walked out of the UN building.
Which means they’ll have to pick a new Secretary General.
Never hurts to start planning ahead. Bush didn’t, and now he’s got…. what… seven Supreme Court vacancies to fill?… and he’s nominated John Roberts for all of them.
Lack of planning, man… just sad.
Fortunately, I’m on top of things with the UNSG. Here’s my short list:

• Bambi! He will save us from Godzilla! He… aw CRAP!
• The SON of Bambi! HE will save us from Godzilla!
• Jesse Jackson – He knows how to unite the many-colored peoples of the world into one happy rainbow. Just like Skittles!
• Mmmm… Skittles…
• Bill Gates – If anyone opposes his mighty will, he can make their computer cr
• Hmmm… must’ve accidentally opposed Bill Gates.
• An Inanimate Carbon Rod – He’s already proved his worth by thwarting the plans of the evil insect overlords.
• Frank J. – The moon will finally get the nuking it so richly deserves.
• Jacques Chirac – Then we’d be able to ignore the UN and the French at the same time, thus increasing America’s disdainfulness quotient.
• SarahK – She’ll make the UN pretty by riddling it with bullets.

All have their virtues, but you KNOW who I just have to give the nod to:
* John Bolton