Puerto Rico does not want a new monkey breeding facility. Apparently, in the ’60s and ’70s monkeys escaped from a facility and now plague a whole town there.
I had never heard of this.
In school I was taught about how America slaughtered Indians, enslaved people, and interred the Japanese, but I guess they decided to keep hidden America’s worst crime of all: plaguing the Puerto Ricans with monkeys.
And now it could happen again.
Yes, they claim the monkey breeding facility is “inescapable”, but anyone evil enough to actually breed monkeys will probably one day just release them on an unsuspecting populace just for laughs.
Call your congressman and tell them to say no to monkey breeding in Puerto Rico. This world has enough horrors already; it doesn’t need more monkeys.
(hat top to Michael J. Nelson)
You know that once they escape, it’s only a matter of time before they become politicians.
‘Cuz everyone knows monkeys need help reproducing! Heck, I bet India has some surplus monkey population, what with reincarnation, sacred monkeys and all. Medical/Pharmaceutical Companies should just move there, experiment on the sacred monkeys in the name of Science!,and under the guise of helping Uncle Haji to the next life.
ha ha monkeys…..
No, no, no, not God bless Jane Goodall. God damn Jane Goodall!
Call your congressman and tell him to cut loose Puerto Rico from our apron strings and force them to take independence before the Democrats make it a state with two more Negro Party Senators.
I am pleased that the people of Guayama cower before the thought of a monkey army terrorizing their town. It is just the sort of effect one wants his monkey army to have.
The U.S. military is no longer allow to practice bombing the hell out of the Puerto Rico because Bush put a stop to it when he was in office. Now we can no longer have crazy monkeys there? They get all these rights but don’t want statehood. Personally I would think Obama would be the greatest President ever if he allowed our military to bomb Puerto Rico with crazy monkeys.
I’d attempt to write something clever here, but how could I top Marko.
Instead of not breeding sweet lil’ Curious-George-type monkeys, why can’t we just stop breeding monkey-faced Liberals & RINOs? Less of the latter means less punching, more earning, more keeping what we earned.
I miss the America that used to wipe out whole species and then move on to another one. Well folks, we can be great again, say it with me! Monkey stew!
Except in Minnesota where they are now the proud constituents of Bozo the Senator. The Senate now has an official “Congressional Clown”. The fact that he is an angry, evil tempered, unattractive (mentally, physically, emotionally and is dead spiritually) means that there should be plenty of fun, foul, furious and freaky to enjoy.
I hope the people in Minnesota are finally so embarrassed by this 2 year old in a 60 year old body that they decide never to elect another Senator, ever. As a matter of fact maybe they should just say no to voting all together. After all they seem to be fine with the ideal of socialism (especially up there in the rarified air at Madison) so I think they should have it. We decide who will represent them as it is blindingly apparent they can’t decide this important issue for themselves. That’s socialism boys and girls………the elites (me and my homies) get to decide for the rabble (that’s all of you who voted for the new ChimpyMcSenator.
The sad part is I bet the angery rabid escaped monkeys could do a better job running the country then the current congress and president. God America is so F@#$ed.
Give it back to Spain.
Is Latina a code word for Monkey ?
Americas greatest crime —Puting a Kenyan in the oval office
Isnt like the whole place a monkey breeding facility? I mean like climate wise?
heh heh heh, Frank said monkey.
I thought that what mexicans did, have babies.
How can you tell the difference between a pueto rican and a monkey? Seriously! how?
We have them in the white house, why shouldn’t they have them terrorizing their towns?
#15 wins.
RE #11: Not holding my breath, but maybe if we’re lucky he’ll be good enough, smart enough, and doggone it, people will like him! 😉 (Seriously though, I’m sick about it too but glad I don’t live in MN)
Holy Howling Monkeys! Now it all makes sense…did you read the part about sending these evil monkies to a zoo in Iraq? Sure….right.
Here’s the real scenario:
We are forced to stop practice bombing in Puerto Rico, which secretly was an attempt by Cheney to keep the evil monkey terrorists in line.
Once the bombing stops, the monkies breed like San Francisco liberals, and overrun the place.
Obama and his ilk see it as a siminan Gitmo, and ship all the evil terrorist monkies to Iraq to destabilize the place and undue Bush’s good work in liberating Iraq. The increase in violence is directly related to this monkey debacle.
Our only hope: airdropping millions of treated bannanas to sterilize the monkies, and addict them to poppy based opiates. This will cause the monkies to invade Afghanistan, forgage and devour every stem of poppy plants, and then in a drug induced rage kill all of the Taliban.
I’m a genius.
NunyaB,
We don’t need to be in MN to be screwed over by that cross-eyed, drooling idiot. The fraudulent elevation of that embezzler of children’s cash helps create a Super Majority in the Senate and can stop the only weapon that the Republicans have: Filibuster. Well, that is, if they had testicles, a spine and any principles to speak of. Republicrat and Demican are the major parties now, right? Man, I am not registering with any party until one arises again that is strict Constructionist when it comes to the Constitution and the dismantling of Fedzilla.
I’m an Independent, not because I have wishy-washy principles, but because I have principles so strongly that I couldn’t sully them any longer by being registered Republican. The GOP makes me sick right now.
I hear ya #20, I was just saying (poorly) that with the Liberal & RINOs already as majority in Congress, we were already screwed (see Jan-Jun 2009). Franken just cements it.
But look at the one bright side: now that they control everything, they have no one else to blame for seriously effing things up/not “fixing” what’s wrong.
They will try to blame anyone else too, and I hope none of us will let them.
P.S. I too registered as NP 3 yrs ago, for pretty much the same reason you did
Pingback: blogwhoring 7-04-09 and 4th of July tribute to our soldiers - rightofcourse.com