The president is looking for a new ghost twitterer. I humble submit myself. I think I could do a good job and be very presidential. Here some examples of tweets I could do perfectly capturing Obama’s voice on Twitter:
SHUT UP!!! I”M VERY SMART!!!!1111!!!
RT link 2 my speech and win free pardon.
i am not just transcribing tweets from my teleprompter! shut up!!!
let me b clear: afm234k$%2@fjJA#$$
today i bought sum arugula. nom nom nom
WE HALF TO PASS HELTHCARE NOW!!! Y U ALL SO STOOPID?!!!
i worry about global warming. and rathni, a disease that only affect unicorns.
reply 2 this if u dem that need me campaign for u.
why no replies? i good campaignor!
I DO NOT HAVE DUMBO EARS!!!! YOU ARE MEEN!!!!111!!!
foreign dignitaries often wear funny hats. so hard not 2 laff!
i have all ur monies which i will spend on arugulas. lol!
What do i have in common with Prius? We both dont stop when we are supposed to!!!11!11one!11
what am i spozed to type here? No one told me.
rush iz a dudu-hed
I downloaded funny screen saver of bush eating bannana but it had virus now those army guys are yelling about misseling codes or sumthin. I told them try contra codes and called them honkeys then hid under my desk. lol, ps do you guys still like me?
OH HELL .. YOU FORGOT… “………(anything good about) My Muslim Friends….. and…. please be sure to include apologies…. Maybe he should apologize for Rwanda…. or Mt. St. Helens …. I am sure America has done something else he can apologize for………ohhhhhhhhh
yes…. and be sure to blame BUSH….(ps…. i will be late on my car payment today…. damn that george bush!)
I’m gay. But not as gay as Frank.
“Michelle’s butt’s too big. Can’t do it.” (01:02 a.m., about 2 Hrs ago)
“Snacking on ice cream and smoking.” (01:48 a.m., about 1 Hrs. ago)
“White House kitchen smoke alarm went off.” (02:05 a.m., about 1 Hr. ago)
“Michelle growling in Klingon? Returning to bed.” (02:15 a.m., 45 min. ago)
“Phone rings. Crisis. Hold on….” (thud) (03:00 a.m., 1 minute ago)
My poo don’t stink even more than when I wuz just organizer.
AMERIKKKA iz blongz to poo flingin commies noz
i haz yus helthcare and momies acorn paid off
remind teleprompter foneticly spelz corpseman
DONT BLAME ME, IZ BUSHZ FALT!
WILL BOW 2 U 4 WAFFLS…
CANT TWEET NOW, BUCKIT ON HED!!!