…and he financed it with a green energy loan from the Dept. of Energy! (However, there was no kickback to his own campaign first. Hey, he’s the P R E S I D E N T.)
…Choom Dog! The finest distilled canine essence to give you the energy of a hyper terrior, whith just an hint of herbal Choom to take off the rough edges. Guaranteed to make you fetch for the Master like The Big Dogs.
Remember, when you need to keep your cool yet stay on your toes running from the law for insurance evasion, the choice is clear… Choom Dog!
marketing??? MARKETING???!?!!??! That’s capitalist talk! in Obama’s world, one does not simply “market” an energy drink!
First one appoints a committee to study the impact of marketing an energy drink
Then, one appoints a committee to stud the impact of the first committee on the endangered snow otter
Then, a budget is proposed and a tax plan is drawn up for funding this alleged energy drink
This budget is then passed through Congress using technicalities and Parliamentary loopholes to avoid actual voting by anyone who might be opposed
The energy drink budget is then given to the Supreme Court to be rubber stamped and rationalized by having the authority to create an energy drink is found in the language of the Constitution by some of the best Nostradamus scholars money can buy
At this point, one of Obama’s top lieutenants is found in criminal contempt of Congress…but this is totally ignored.
Then, the IRS is given broad powers to enforce this new tax to find Obama’s energy drink.
Two years later, someone realizes that “the people” are going to start demanding this energy drink they’re being taxed for and someone better get off their communist ass and make one.
A private firm is now hired to actually develop the energy drink…of course this was never budgeted for in the original “energy drink tax”, of which the money has already been spent so another tax must be levied to fund the development of the energy drink
After billions spent on research on the most environmentally friendly and least likely method to turn a profit, the private firm, billions over budget and years behind schedule files for bankruptcy.
. . . funded by the government, manufactured by Solyndra, powered by solar energy, and with a tendency to combust spontaneously when left sitting in the refrigerator in your garage. If you don’t buy at least a six-pack per week, you pay a penaltytaxcommerce participation fee bunch of money to the government, for reasons that are not clear to you, to support programs you abhor.
…Poochi Cola!
and if it works like his economic stimulus it should put you right to sleep.
…called Monster Government.
Green Algae
Made with the finest stagnant water.
…because nobody gets anywhere all by themselves.
Drink one then wait for the effects in the NEXT term.
He’s only marketing it because he didn’t get there on his own.
… called Red Bullsh!t.
Hair of the Dog tonic
…but, most people will probably just pay the penalty instead of buying one.
…and he financed it with a green energy loan from the Dept. of Energy! (However, there was no kickback to his own campaign first. Hey, he’s the P R E S I D E N T.)
(I like #7’s better. CarolyntheMommy FTW!)
…. only $800 billion a can.
after Carolyn there’s no point in even trying….
that’s the one right there.
It’ called Bonk!, because it avoids actual stimulus and goes straight for the insulin crash. And it’s free (because your grandchildren pay for it).
It’s for Michelle.
made from the finest puppies from your local pound. MMMM, good, just like those ones i had in indonesia.
…you have to buy it or pay a
taxpenalty.You don’t get anything done, but you can blame someone else.
…the bottles have little solar panels and windmills, FREE Energy Drinks!!1!1!!
It’s called “US OPEN”.
A play on words as it’s not named for the tournament but an invitation to illegals everywhere!
Red Bullsh!t –
It gives you Bolshevik ideals at a Menchevik
pricefeetax ratepenalty…it gives you wiiings…cause you’ll need them to work in the collective farms
…Choom Dog! The finest distilled canine essence to give you the energy of a hyper terrior, whith just an hint of herbal Choom to take off the rough edges. Guaranteed to make you fetch for the Master like The Big Dogs.
Remember, when you need to keep your cool yet stay on your toes running from the law for insurance evasion, the choice is clear… Choom Dog!
…called Red Fool. It doesn’t actually produce any energy, but you turn green and lose $500 million of other people’s money.
…and Instapundit takes a second look at Obama.
Heh. Indeed.
It will cost $100 a can, and if you don’t buy two a week, you will have to pay a $185 penalty.
it stabilizes you at zero
…available in both flavors: watermelon AND fried chicken. yeah, i said it.
…and IT’S PEOPLE!!!
…and Biden’s trying to figure out how to hook it up to recharge his BlackBerry.
…made from the tears of the bourgeois!
Obama’s marketing a new energy drink, but it’s really just more kool-aid.
…Specifically made for those who will follow him and help shred the Constitution!
Buy a 6 pack of TRAITOR-ADE
@CarolyntheMommy – perfection.
It gives you enough energy to play as much golf as Tiger Woods and run a country* at the same time.
*run a country into the ground
marketing??? MARKETING???!?!!??! That’s capitalist talk! in Obama’s world, one does not simply “market” an energy drink!
First one appoints a committee to study the impact of marketing an energy drink
Then, one appoints a committee to stud the impact of the first committee on the endangered snow otter
Then, a budget is proposed and a tax plan is drawn up for funding this alleged energy drink
This budget is then passed through Congress using technicalities and Parliamentary loopholes to avoid actual voting by anyone who might be opposed
The energy drink budget is then given to the Supreme Court to be rubber stamped and rationalized by having the authority to create an energy drink is found in the language of the Constitution by some of the best Nostradamus scholars money can buy
At this point, one of Obama’s top lieutenants is found in criminal contempt of Congress…but this is totally ignored.
Then, the IRS is given broad powers to enforce this new tax to find Obama’s energy drink.
Two years later, someone realizes that “the people” are going to start demanding this energy drink they’re being taxed for and someone better get off their communist ass and make one.
A private firm is now hired to actually develop the energy drink…of course this was never budgeted for in the original “energy drink tax”, of which the money has already been spent so another tax must be levied to fund the development of the energy drink
After billions spent on research on the most environmentally friendly and least likely method to turn a profit, the private firm, billions over budget and years behind schedule files for bankruptcy.
wait…what was the point of this exercise again?
. . . funded by the government, manufactured by Solyndra, powered by solar energy, and with a tendency to combust spontaneously when left sitting in the refrigerator in your garage. If you don’t buy at least a six-pack per week, you pay a
penaltytaxcommerce participation feebunch of money to the government, for reasons that are not clear to you, to support programs you abhor.If you still feel malaise after drinking it, it’s Bush’s fault
…but the Republicans in Congress won’t give you a chance to buy it
…and he’s invoking Executive Privilege to keep you from seeing the long-form nutrition information
He’s not advertising how great it is. He’s just trying to convince you the other energy drinks are worse
You have to pass it to see what’s in it.
It’s now covered as a pre-existing condition.
… it’s solar and wind in a cup and will be available in 10 years after a $100 billion government loan “investment”.
It’s a lot like his energy policy; you open the can and find that there’s nothing there but hot air.
It’s called the Volt.
Gatorade (What, you thought it belonged to the Gatorade company itself? It’s not their business.)