[High Praise! to DamnCat]

Nutjob Islamist – sees cross in tomato:

Nutjob Liberal – sees Obama “O” in beer:

Liberals are like Islamists – no matter how you try to reason with them, they’ll only see what they want to see.

From Jim Geraghty:

If you want less government corruption, you need less government.

From Dana Gould:

“I’ll need a leotard!” – One of Peter Parker’s first thoughts after gaining special powers.

From David Burge:

Give a man a fish, he’ll eat for a day. Promise a man free government fishcare, he’ll vote for you forever.

The message of the story is supposed to be “dang, we’ll miss having Obama come to Martha’s Vineyard!”, but pay attention to the words I put in bold:

Nancy Gardella, executive director of the Martha’s Vineyard Chamber of Commerce, is disappointed about the Obamas’ withdrawn visit, “I think the fun and the curiosity and the buzz that comes with this will be missed, quite frankly.”

Gardella said the White House had booked lodgings for the famous family for August but canceled those plans in May. She said not having the Obamas on the island will add a little flexibility to their end-of-summer economy, including the number of rooms available and additional income they can generate.

Translation: being visited by Obama will kill your local economy.

Anyone else reminded of those prisoners in Vietnam forced to make propaganda videos who blinked “torture” in Morse Code?

The new job numbers have come out. They are not good. Only 80,000 jobs were added, and unemployment remains unchanged at 8.2% – 10.9% if the labor force were the same size as when Obama took office.

Three and half years later, this apparently is still all Bush’s fault as Obama is completely impotent as president. I mean, he’s just a useless slug. We should have just elected a sack of potatoes for all the good that Obama could do for the economy. At least that’s Obama’s argument as he still doesn’t think it’s right to judge him on the economy. If I really sucked at something, I wouldn’t want to be judged on it either. Anyway, it’s time for some new slogans for the Obama campaign knowing that we’re going to continue to have a bad economy:

“You want jobs. I taxed people who don’t have insurance. That’s similar.”

“Maybe jobs are doing bad, but hobbies are doing okay.”

“You don’t deserve a good economy.”

“For those of you who hate having an overbearing boss, you’re welcome.”

“Why are you all so obsessed with money?”

“Gas is too high for you to afford to drive to work anyway.”

“Did you like Avengers? I liked the movie Avengers just like you did.”

“Well, I’m doing pretty well financially, so I don’t know what you’re all doing wrong.”