…is listening to him extoll over and over to ‘…stay away from that cliff…!’ and you’re on Pennsylvania Blvd.
You then discover he’s talking to Valerie, Dave and Ben, on Skype.
…is, in a twisted Parallax View scenario, having been told to fly to Las Vegas, pick up the keys to an up-armored Dodge Durango and slam it into Harry “Homeless Drifter” Reid’s SUV as it sped up I-15 earlier today because Obama wants to get the coup started ahead of schedule.
…is intentionally hitting the dogs then stopping for the roadkill
…not being allowed to make right turns.
…is knowing you can’t get there from here.
…is not knowing how many people are being dragged under your car.
…: choom smoke gets in your eyes.
…is knowing that your limo’s license and registration have not been released.
…is installing bidens car seat
…is REMOVING biden’s car seat. 😀
is the MILLIONS of adoring fans getting in the way-no really!!
…is Obama’s wearing a fedora and mask, and constantly referring to you as Kato.
…is living through the paranoia of the possibility that Barak would again have gay shagging episodes with one of his boyfriends
…is the Hula Michelle doll he makes you keep on the dashboard.
…having to check the blind spots and reset the GPS when Obama says “let me be clear”
…are all the Dog’n’Suds wrappers he keeps throwing into the front seat.
Whenever Obama says go ‘Forward’ the GPS says ‘Recalculating’….
Dean Winters keeps falling onto the hood or windshield.
…is Moochelle’s smell when it is Sasquatch mating season.
…is the backseat driver.
…is Barack in the back with a pinwheel screaming “Weeee. Wee. Weeeee”
. . . is he used to be the CEO of a green energy company that got stimulus money and went bankrupt.
. . . he can see Barack in the rearview mirror, but it’s odd he can never see Michelle.
. . . filling up the tank costs more than his paycheck.
getting the stink of failure out of the upholstery.
Cleaning up the dog mess . . . BBQ sauce stains the upholstery.
Being called a racist every time he turns right.
The teleprompter blocks the rear-view and hogs the power adapter.
Is knowing that Obama has to do a Shout Out or Phone a Friend whenever he’s asked about economics.
is that he really thought he would be able to land the toilet cleaning job, but alas, no.
#4 Bacon!
…is having to tell Biden EVERY SINGLE DAY to STOP playing with the windows.
…fighting the urge to say “yes” when the state border guard asks if you have any fruits or vegetables to claim.
. . . Obama is constantly changing the destination but keeps blaming in on the previous passenger.
He keeps saying “It’s 106 miles to Chicago. We’ve got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses.”
. . . Obama has forbidden him from singing “Baba Yetu”.
. . . he was demoted from being Valerie Jarret’s driver.
. . . that eerie feeling he gets when Obama tells him to ignore the bumps in the road.
…is listening to him extoll over and over to ‘…stay away from that cliff…!’ and you’re on Pennsylvania Blvd.
You then discover he’s talking to Valerie, Dave and Ben, on Skype.
…while Obama is always having you avoid ditches, he doesn’t seem to notice the cliff his directions has you driving over.
The worst part about being Obama’s limo driver…having to bow to HIM.
The worst part about being Obama’s limo driver…resisting the urge to call Michelle “Miss Daisy”.
The worst part about being Obama’s limo driver…is that you can’t see traffic in the rearview mirror..just ears.
The worst part about being Obama’s limo driver…is that you are the freakin’ Vice President for Pete’s sake !!!!
The worst part about being Obama’s limo driver…is that you didn’t “make the cut” to be Oprah’s limo driver.
The worst part about being Obama’s limo driver…is having to tell Michelle that all the fast food wrappers are yours.
…is you witness a crack-up and then realize it’s in the backseat.
…is you’re safe if t-boned, dog boned…not so much.
…GPS never has enough information for Obama to know where to go, how to get there or where he is starting from.
…is not the plastic Jesus on the dash, it’s the plasic Jesus you have to drive around.
… is taking the fall for not sending security to Benghazi.
The worst part about being Obama’s limo driver… is that the glass divider prevents a contact high…
CarolyntheMommy is biased!
…being asked to pick up his ‘Mom Jeans” from the cleaners.
……..is having to drag his punk “^%*^” around day and night watching people fawn all over him like he’s done something important or even relevant.
plumping the car seats after Moochelle has flattened them to the floor. Again.
Cleaning up the Doggy Bags after Obama leaves.
… All the bumps in the road
… Knowing he’s out of a job in like 2 months
…is, in a twisted Parallax View scenario, having been told to fly to Las Vegas, pick up the keys to an up-armored Dodge Durango and slam it into Harry “Homeless Drifter” Reid’s SUV as it sped up I-15 earlier today because Obama wants to get the coup started ahead of schedule.
Obama
he keeps wanting you to play ‘Cash Cab’ with members of congress.
…is realizing that now, in addition to fleas, there are bedbugs in YOUR limo.
is wearing out the brakes from having to stop and scrape up every dead dog from along the motorcade route.
is the de facto duty of constantly reminding your passenger “sir, you really need to get to the office and get some actual work done.”
…is constantly having to get body work done on the limo where the One bangs into it with the bucket on his head.
is continually defending the fact that just because your limo is black, you’re not a racist.
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