Archive of entries posted on February 2014

Wisdom of the Day: Cologne Batman Bitcoin Dog Funny

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Obama Warned Us – What Government Does

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We hear all the time about how government is the problem. Well, it turns out we rely on it in a whole lot of ways. Not only does it keep us strong through our military and our law enforcement, it plays a vital role in caring for our seniors and our veterans, educating our kids, making sure our workers are trained for the jobs that are being created, arming our businesses with the best science and technology so they can compete with companies from other countries. It plays a key role in keeping our food and our toys and our workplaces safe. It helps folks rebuild after a storm. It conserves our natural resources. It finances startups. It helps to sell our products overseas. It provides security to our diplomats abroad.

BARACK OBAMA, remarks on the reopening of the government, Oct. 17, 2013

“Oh, wait… not that last one.”

What if a liberal had to actually think?

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CanadaFlagLeafLiberals (or “progressives” for those that think that moniker disguises their ill-thought philosophy) in America must really be thankful that this next item is happening in Canada, and not here in the U.S.

Liberals have a way of supporting certain people for specific reasons without having to put any thought into it. For instance, if someone is gay, then they’re automatically worthy of praise. If someone is a Moslem, that person is in the right all the time. And, of course, if someone is a liberal politician, they can drive an Oldsmobile off a bridge and leave a woman underwater to die and be a hero. There’s no thought involved. If they are one of you, or one of your pet causes — maybe they think of them as pets? — you automatically support them, damn the facts of the situation. No thought necessary.

There’s a situation the Canadians are having to deal with up in Toronto that would drive a liberal nuts. Well, liberals are already nuts, so, more nuts. Seems a lesbian walked into a Moslem barber shop and asked for a haircut:

Shop co-owner Omar Mahrouk told her his Muslim faith prohibits him from touching a woman who is not a member of his family. All the other barbers said the same thing.

Now, she’s filed a complaint with some rights commission or whatever it is the Canadians have up there in Canadia. They’ll end up doing some Canadian thing, and it will probably be stupid unless it involves hockey, beer, and a moose. If they resolved it with hockey, beer, and a moose, that would be awesome.

I’m just waiting on something like this to happen here in the U.S. Imagine the situation liberals would be in. They’d have to pick a side. They’d have to think about it. And, goodness knows, liberals don’t have the capacity to think.

Then, again, maybe we could go one better than the Canadians. What do you think would be an even better situation to happen here in the U.S.? One that would involve two of liberals’ pets going at each other? What story would you like to see happen?

Random Thoughts: Oppressors, Coffee, and Atheists

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In a free country, there should be a stigma as bad as racism for people who try to use government force to solve every problem.

Last year Downton Abbey season finale was nothing happening for hour and a half and then boom. This one was just nothing happening.

Hit Bowser with a bunch of fireballs but he was just a goomba in disguise. #FirstWorldProblems

Flavored coffee? I thought coffee was a flavor.

Did police ever figure out who the Rumsfeld Strangler was?

We can’t have a free society unless we can force people to bake cakes.

Good rule of thumb on figuring out who is the oppressor: Look for who is using government force to make someone else do something.

A hundred years from now, people will look back on those who fought for gay marriage and say, “What a bunch of smug a-holes.”

You get the same nicotine fix from a vapor cigarette, but does it make you look as cool as you do smoking a real cigarette?

Anything you do is okay if you’re really really sure history will vindicate you.

“If you like your poison-free water supply, you can keep it! HAHAHAHAHA!” -Obama as a Batman villain

Ooh. I have a free Starbucks drink. What insane concoction shall I come up with?

I mean, I usually just get black coffee at Starbucks, or if I’m feeling exotic, an Americano, but seems a waste to use free drink on that.

BTW, Starbucks needs a place to report baristas who give you Pike’s Place when you clearly asked for the dark roast.

Why doesn’t Starbucks keep dark roast coffee brewed all day long? Who are these people who actually like Pike’s Place?

Bigots who didn’t want black people in their neighborhood would’ve seemed less awful if they came up with a fancy term like “gentrification.”

Harry Reid saying something stupid is too expected to register on my outrage meter. He once claimed taxes were voluntary.

The upper class’s attitude toward servants in Downton Abbey is a good example we should emulate for our attitude toward politicians.

“You won’t bake me a cake so I’m going to come back with the government and its guns to shut down your bakery.” -oppressed person

Religious objections to gay marriage aren’t going to go away and you will need to learn to live with them.

I don’t want my kids to be bullied; how hard is it to teach them to be the bullies?

I wish I got as much joy out of anything as my nine month old son does out of everything.

What about the people denied the right of marriage because no one likes them?

The reason atheists need to proselytize is so people will go to the good oblivion and not the bad oblivion reserved for religious people.

“I think everyone who believe in Jesus is an idiot and that Jesus would condemn everyone I don’t like.” -lots and lots of people, apparently

Legally, do we distinguish between “religious beliefs” and “beliefs”? Because, practically, I don’t think there is one.

The one thing I don’t get about the movie The Usual Suspects is how that detective didn’t recognize the vice president.

Wisdom of the Day: Gallon Religious Supplies Gluten Batman Bombs Teen Stanley Netflix Invisibility

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