(Submitted by The Looking Spoon via Independent Journal Review [High Praise!])
*sigh*
Yes, someone on the left actually thought this was a good idea:
Oh, and just to put a cherry on this scummy sundae, I made this:
UPDATE:
Les of Nuking Politics [High Praise!] does it better:
[High Praise! to MightyMega]
It’s as good a job of condensing the story that much as you’ll see, and it cuts out a LOT of tedious walking & running scenes.
Plus, it’s stop-motion-animated Legos, so it’s awesome.
[LEGO Lord of the Rings: Two Towers in Two Minutes] (Viewer #207,463)
A new study shows that texting while walking throws off balance and posture, increasing the risk of injury.
Even worse, text-related injuries are only covered under Obamacare Platinum.
[High Praise! to (I think someone in the comments, but I lost the link and can’t remember the name, so pipe up if it was you)]
Yeah, it’s a real thing. Generally available for $2 at various places around the internet. Google the title.
Sample page:
[High Praise! to MightyMega]
Star Wars NFL Football Team Franchises
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]
i believe in a higher power (airwolf)
— jon hendren (@fart) February 5, 2014
"You're gonna like the way you look, or you're gonna have to drink this year-old milk." ~ Men's Darehouse
— Michael (@Home_Halfway) February 5, 2014
Job-lock prevents funemployment, I guess.
— Nathan Wurtzel (@NathanWurtzel) February 5, 2014
I don't care how I end up as long as my Wikipedia page has a section marked "Tank Rampage".
— Patrick Brennan (@Pat_Bren) February 5, 2014
The Sochi Olympics have accomplished what Stalin couldn't – the American press is reporting unfavorably on Russia.
— Leon Wolf (@LeonHWolf) February 5, 2014
Mark Zuckerberg makes me long for the era of billionaires wearing top hats and monocles.
— Anthony Bialy (@AnthonyBialy) February 5, 2014
"the lego movie" opens on friday and will remain in theaters until dad steps on one in bare feet and gets so mad he throws them all away
— john freiler (@johnfreiler) February 5, 2014
That lady's pretty but she's no spring chicken. Certainly no barn owl. My birdlust clouds my vision to be honest.
— Ceej (@ceejoyner) February 5, 2014
Now if we could just get CVS to stop carrying Axe Body Spray.
— Sammy Rhodes (@sammyrhodes) February 6, 2014
I don't want to alarm you but WOO WOO WOO WOO WOO BEEP BEEP BEEP HONK HONK HONK WOO WOO WOO
— inmynewskin (@inmynewskin) February 6, 2014
The bank robber points his gun and says, "I'm offering you a new option. Put the money in the bag."
— David Freddoso (@freddoso) February 6, 2014
To avoid onerous regulations, Smith & Wesson announced that it will no longer sell its handguns in California.
If only California were as successful at chasing criminals out of the state.
So instead of competing to offer confusing products, companies will compete the old-fashioned way, by offering better products. And that will mean more choices for consumers, more opportunities for businesses, and more stability in our financial system. And unless your business model depends on bilking people, there is little to fear from these new rules.
BARACK OBAMA, speech, Apr. 22, 2010
“Fortunately, these rules don’t apply to government agencies (whose business IS bilking people), so, again – no fear.”
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
The US is developing the world’s most powerful laser. It will be used…
When you go to Heaven and tell Jesus all about the cool science behind evolution, He’ll act interested but He doesn’t really care that much.
President Obama vows not to rest until he finds the real jobs killer.
“It’s vigilante justice! No one really wanted that job — they wanted to be FREEEE!” -serial-killer Obama standing over the corpse of a job
A much more interesting debate would be two Christians theologically debating creationism.
This Clay Aiken bid for Congress will end like it did with him and American Idol – someone else will win who we’ll never hear about again.
I’m job-locked to support all the deadbeats in this country.
PRO TIP: You can conceal carry with no consequence in any place that doesn’t make you pass through a metal detector. Because it’s concealed.
Kinda confusing to say Pluto isn’t a planet and then say it’s a dwarf planet which just sounds like a specific type of planet.
I need to teach these things to my three-year-old daughter, so get your crap together, science.
So did Russia hose off all the Communism before people started arriving for the Olympics?
It’s great how Obama is rescuing people from jobs like how Godzilla rescues people from being trapped in buildings.
“We will now call the unemployment number the ‘freedom number.'”
NBC should make one of their Sochi correspondents Yakov Smirnoff… or does the KGB still have a kill order on him?
Fistful of Dollars is actually by far my least favorite of the Man with No Name trilogy. Really like Yojimbo, though.
I feel so much better now that I know I can hover over the rounded Twitter follower count to see the real count.
“This could be a least favorite jelly bean flavor.” -first person to taste a coconut
Where did the expression “pitter-patter of little feet” come from? From my experience with toddlers, it’s more of a THOMP! THOMP! THOMP!
Should the tag for all these complaints about Sochi be #SecondWorldProblems?
“You like guns? I like guns! What is abortion?” -Wendy Davis
My Facebook movie was pretty touching, but I think it helps that I don’t post much to Facebook except about big events.
The best way to celebrate Reagan’s birthday is to strangle a Communist.
I know it sounds like I’m joking around and making fun of it, but seriously, watch curling.
Did you know Barack HUSSEIN Obama signed executive order making it illegal to strangle Communists because he hates America and being awesome?
If Woody Allen goes to jail, how is Hollywood going to survive without all the income from his blockbusters?
I like Reagan, but I’d rather people not subscribe to the belief that one day the right politicians will swoop in and save the day.
The right should claim “liberal,” not those promoting the same failed big government ideas from 100 years ago.
Individual freedom is still a very liberal idea which defenders of the status quo – the left – are opposed to.
A while back, my daughter decided to crochet. That was around the time she was pregnant. So, close to two years ago, or thereabouts. She’s done a little bit with it, but has found out that raising a child can be pretty time-consuming. I mean, who knew?
Heh.
Now that my youngest grandson is getting into everything, learning to talk, hiding the TV remote, and all the other things year-and-a-half old boys get into, she needs something to help her relax. Add to that, a husband attending business school, she has her hands full. Oh, and starting her own business. Yeah, that takes time, too. But, maybe, just maybe, she’ll be able to find something to help her relax. Something productive.
I don’t know if she’ll have time. And, it’s okay if she doesn’t. But, if she does decide to pick up the hooks and create a crochet masterpiece, I want one of these (Harvey led me to them):
[Source: Harvey > TechnaBob > Neatorama > DeviantART]
Yes, that’s a cross between the Doctor Who villains, the Daleks, and My Little Pony.
With everything my daughter has going on, she won’t get to this any time soon. Or, maybe, ever. But perhaps you’ve been wanting a project.
You’re welcome.
A new report shows that Canada is now rated as being more business-friendly than the US.
Wonder if they’ll end up having to build a fence on their southern border to keep out the flood of illegal entrepreneurs?
