(Submitted by Slapout [High Praise!])

A new report shows that 80% of illegals captured at the border get set free in the US.
So… basically just an international game of Red Light/Green Light, except with fewer lasting consequences.
[High Praise! to Mental Floss]
Why Are There Crushed Stones Alongside Railroad Tracks?
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)
Donald Trump said he’d consider using assets seized from Mexican drug lords to pay for a border wall.
Also, how about an amnesty deal where illegals who help build it get to stay in America?
When Americans stand together, there’s no challenge too great to solve — not even climate change. #ActOnClimate today
@BarackObama
Still can’t beat the challenge of keeping Obamacare from bankrupting, though. Go figure.
I’m sure Hillary is as healthy as she is competent.
Probably the easiest place to get Apple’s new AirPods will be a lost and found.
I’m kinda offended by the Spanish word for the color black whenever I see it. They need to change it.
Always wondered what Scrooge McDuck’s accountant thought of his plan to put his money in a vault he could swim in instead of mutual funds.
Trump vs. Hillary makes me think of at least two people who deserve to be placed in a basket of deplorables.
Hillary holds half of all Trump voters in complete contempt. And the other half. And most of her own supporters. She’s not a people person.
Anyone really enthusiastic for either Trump or Hillary is deplorable.
“OWN IT!” -Sean Hannity selling mattresses
Trump versus Hillary’s running mate what’s his face would probably be a landslide for bland.
All these Hillary health questions are nonsense. For a good-sized portion of each day, she’s able to walk under her own power.
My suggestion for the Hillary campaign: Start making the font for “Kaine” a bit bigger.
We’ll all believe whatever explanation Hillary gives for that clip of her collapsing because of her notorious honesty.
When Hillary left Chelsea’s apartment supposedly walking under her own power, I could see wires.
The human response would be sympathy for Hillary, but it’s hard with all the dishonesty and opaqueness.
Can’t believe sexist coverage of Hillary. Anyone who’s been around women know they’re frail creatures who collapse constantly for no reason.
So first she was “overheated” and now she has pneumonia. Look at all the trust Clinton engenders.
“She just overheated, that’s all. And… she has pneumonia! Yeah, that’s the ticket! Now I need to go home to my wife… Morgan Fairchild.”
If Hillary has pneumonia, does that mean she was trying to kill that kid she hugged?
Don’t carry water for Trump or Hillary. That takes away as much of your soul as a horcrux.
Not to cry racism, but how come no one had a problem with the national anthem before we had a black president?
Bill Clinton: “This is nothing new. She collapses all the time. Doctors say we should be concerned, but I don’t care.”
Sounds like Mike Pence is deplore-unable.
Hillary is going to hug deplorable racists and kill them with her pneumonia like she did that child.
Sony is planning to create a robot that will build an “emotional connection” with humans.
Brilliant… has no one ever seen the Twilight Zone episode “From Agnes – With Love“?