Harvey posted this in 2009. — The Editors

[conceptual hat tip: Dylan]
I know Obama prefers burgers, but I’m guessing that he ate a lot of Chinese food on his recent trip.

I also assume that Chinese Chinese food comes with a fortune cookie, just like American Chinese food.

Which leads to the obvious speculative query: what fortunes did Obama get in his fortune cookies?

I speculate thusly:

• You do good job! Take a bow!
• If you have bad news to break, leave town and let Holder guy do it.
• You look better wearing Mao jacket. Everyone look better wearing Mao jacket. Whole world wear Mao jacket soon!
• You will try something new – a terrorist in New York City.
• China cold like Chicago. Bring heavy coat.
• Save lives. Make Biden walk.
• Prosperity is coming. Just tax it until it go away.
• Why you let wife go out in public dressed like that?
• Today you meet friend from long ago. Tomorrow you throw him under bus.
• Seriously, where birth certificate?

If you’ve gone through Obama’s trash recently and found any of his old fortune cookie fortunes, feel free to share in the comments.