“My vote is much more consequential than yours, plebeian, consequently my vote has more consequences in terms of voting, except perhaps for those votes cast by plot 17 of the Valhalla Memorial cemetery, which votes, consequently, have certain eternal consequences…”
“Well, seriously, I’m an alpha-male when I need to be. Mostly, I’m a prevaricating, nancing, alpha-beta hybrid metrosexual dipsh*t so I blend in however needed. But in this case, Trump is too alpha for my alpha and I think I’m manly enough (it’s gotten bigger lately!) to vote for a woman like Kamala. Especially like Kamala! So, it’s either Kamala (who some say sucks too much), or, my distant cousin, the lovely Emma Kameltoe, a saucy Sasquatch living in North Carolina! She’d be really good at the job and has a firm grasp on her members!”
Sasquatch:
“I’m sooo sick of all you Deplorables and Garbage People comparing Michelle Obama to me. Stop it! Or prepare to go to court.”
I’m voting for Kamala but my vote actually identifies as Trump.
“My vote is much more consequential than yours, plebeian, consequently my vote has more consequences in terms of voting, except perhaps for those votes cast by plot 17 of the Valhalla Memorial cemetery, which votes, consequently, have certain eternal consequences…”
A sentiment I’ve heard from the old hippy war protest days seems to apply here:
Girls say Yes to guys who say No.
“Well, seriously, I’m an alpha-male when I need to be. Mostly, I’m a prevaricating, nancing, alpha-beta hybrid metrosexual dipsh*t so I blend in however needed. But in this case, Trump is too alpha for my alpha and I think I’m manly enough (it’s gotten bigger lately!) to vote for a woman like Kamala. Especially like Kamala! So, it’s either Kamala (who some say sucks too much), or, my distant cousin, the lovely Emma Kameltoe, a saucy Sasquatch living in North Carolina! She’d be really good at the job and has a firm grasp on her members!”