"hey, we caught Bin Laden" oh wow *looks around* where is he then? "oh um, we uhh.. threw him in the sea.. it was definitely him though"
— k e e t (@KeetPotato) January 6, 2014
Job interview tip: Let the interviewer know that if you wanted them dead, you'd have done so before you even entered the room.
— Michael (@Home_Halfway) January 6, 2014
Nice try, climate deniers. Just imagine how much worse it would be right now if the Earth WASN'T getting warmer!
— Jim Treacher (@jtLOL) January 6, 2014
Santa Fe means Saint Iron
— michael (@michaeljhudson) January 6, 2014
Can you imagine if MacGyver wanted to kill himself no one would have been able to stop him.
— Sean Gabay (@ixSEANxi) January 6, 2014
People who write obsessively about politics don't care about you; they care about other people who write obsessively about politics.
— Dave Barry (@rayadverb) January 6, 2014