[High Praise! to The Looking Spoon]
Archive of entries posted on 28th January 2014
Spherical Mirror and Parody
[YouTube direct link] (Viewer #3,121,580)
That was kinda awesome, but mostly I posted that so you’d enjoy this, which is also kinda awesome:
[YouTube direct link] (Viewer #737,814)
It’s the Obvious Solution, Right?
Democrat Congressman Gerry Connolly plans to introduce a bill requiring the Transportation Security Administration to be more polite to airline passengers.
Yes, because a good “please & thank you” would make getting groped perfectly palatable.
Because America
Link of the Day: Creepy Ducks and Whatever the Opposite of Bulgyness Is.
[High Praise! to 4of7 of Little Worlds]
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Wisdom of the Day: Jerk Drunk Horse Issues Nunchucks
The Jerk Store called. They said there was a massive security breach and hackers stole your credit card information
— Froghammer (@froghammer) January 27, 2014
"I'm drunk!" – Kool Aid man's last words
— Mary Charlene (@IamEnidColeslaw) January 27, 2014
A good way to demoralize a horse would be to make it pull a wagon carrying a bunch of better dressed horses.
— Matt Roller (@rolldiggity) January 27, 2014
Style guide: "Talking about issues" is good. "Looking for a chance to dialogue" is worse than whatever you're offended about.
— Sean Thomason (@TheThomason) January 27, 2014
I thought buying a pair of nunchucks in high school was going to change everything.
— Will Kane (@3rdand10) January 27, 2014
Just Routine. Nothing to See Here
The National Security Agency has implanted software in nearly 100,000 computers around the world that allows them to conduct surveillance on those machines.
Which raises the question: if they found anything, would Eric Holder let them use it?
Obama Warned Us – Campaigning
What frustrates the American people is a Washington where every day is Election Day. We can’t wage a perpetual campaign where the only goal is to see who can get the most embarrassing headlines about the other side -– a belief that if you lose, I win.
BARACK OBAMA, State of the Union Address, Jan. 27, 2010
“Oh, wait… I’m winning the embarrassing headline battle… nevermind.”
Straight Line of the Day: The Weirdest Moment at the Grammy Awards…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
The weirdest moment at the Grammy Awards…
Attack Cows
A report from Germany says that cows blew up a shed at a farm in Rasdorf.
Methane gas from 90 flatulent cows exploded in a German farm shed on Monday, damaging the roof and injuring one of the animals, police said.
Why were cows collecting the gas? What do they have in mind? Are they plotting against us? Did we dodge a bullet here, and the cows tip their hand by accidentally blowing themselves up?
Here in the US, cows are best known as advertising icons for a chicken restaurant. Well, that and giving milk. And…
Oh. Yeah. Hamburgers.
Maybe that’s it. Maybe they don’t like being in sammiches. So, why are they collecting their farts to blow things up in Germany? Well, what’s the most famous sammich in which you’ll find cow parts? That’s right. Hamburgers. And where is Hamburg? Yep, in Germany.
So, what do we do? Nothing. The hamburger was actually invented in the US, not in Germany. Stupid cows don’t have any idea what they’re doing.
I’m not saying it’s okay that cows are blowing things up in Germany. I’m saying that the Germans got it under control. They don’t need out help. If any country knows how to wage war on a group, it’s Germany. That’s why the terrorists don’t attack them.
Random Thoughts: Axes, Macklemore, and the Rich
My daughter gave my mom a Grammy award.
Can you use a battle axe to cut firewood or do I need two separate axes?
Macklemore sounds like a good name for schlubby, plainclothes detective who doesn’t always play by the rules.
Don’t know about Nazi references, but many see the rich as these infinite pinatas they can constantly whack and will always drop more candy.
October 21, 2015 is the date when hopefully we should stop seeing photoshopped images claiming today is the day Marty McFly arrives in the future.
But at Least His Talk Is Still Cheap
The budget recently signed by President Obama will cost taxpayers nearly $3 million per word.
Probably did that on purpose so his $10.10/hr minimum wage proposal seems less extravagant.