Iraq has decided to let in weapon inspectors. Dammit. This isn’t going to ruin our plans to kick the crap out of them, is it? Can’t we just bomb them anyway and call it inspections? After we hit their buildings, we observe the color of the resultant flame to find out what chemicals were inside; sounds more efficent than walking through the buildings. We could also inspect much of their ground troops and military hardware. Finally, we should inspect Saddam with a sniper rifle.

And if any of you U.N. members complain, then we’ll inspect you next. Capisce?