A lot of people are jumping on CBS News and Dan Rather for releasing forged documents, but many people just don’t know how to spot them. Thus, as a service to all, I’ve come up with a list of ways to tell that a document is forged.
TOP TEN WAYS TO TELL A DOCUMENT WASN’T ACTUALLY TYPED IN THE SEVENTIES
10. It Includes clip art to illustrate its points.
9. Instead of typewriter indents at each letter, there’s only a stain from Extra Spicy Nacho Doritos.
8. Signature of well know person is just an ‘X’.
7. ‘X’ is spelled wrong.
6. If you burn it as part of a “test,” the owner just says, “Eh, we can get another.”
5. The document makes frequent references to The Simpsons.
4. The document makes no reference to All in the Family.
3. It’s still warm from the laser printer.
2. The person who gives it you giggles incessantly after you accept it.
And the number one way to tell a document wasn’t actually typed in the seventies…
Half of it is missing because Windows crashed.
first?
yep.
Nice one Frank,
still warm from the laser printer 🙂
‘X’ is spelled wrong?? Heh heh. Stupid liberals.
How do you spell X?
That’s a good question. Those silly muckadoos probably spelled ‘ecks’ or something.
On the topic of “memo-gate”….whoever gave those phony memos to CBS, should be revealed, and paraded through the country so we can jeer them and question their patriotism.
I am watching FOXnews (yay for fair and balanced news!) and they were talking about how the UN announced that the invasion of Iraq was unjust. Well let’s all cry. They think that us invading Iraq was unjust, however the whole oil for food scandal is just dandy with them. They probably think it’s some kind of like fair trade or something. Right. Since when do we even care what they think? Lol.
“Let’s tear down the UN and put up a Starbucks”…that’s one of my favorite thoughts from Mark Smith’s book called “The official handbook of the vast right wing conspiracy”. hehe…Starbucks….I need morning coffee.
LOL. i heart #1, 4, 5, 10.
It’s ok. I have documents from the seventies when the United Nations granted the United States one free invasion. Sure, it looks like the Monopoly “Get Out Of Jail Free” card but my sources tell me it’s legit.
*Half of it is missing because Windows crashed.
Indeed.
Hey, how’s it feel to be a big-time member of the “Pajamahadeen”? Jim Geraghty over at The Kerry Spot has coined a brilliant new term for all youse blogger types. Heh.
Frank, you’re getting some pub from MM today.
Under the new rules of CBS evidence if a faked document is proven to be fake it doesn’t matter as long it is true. Do you have to provide documentation that proves the truth of the fake document and can that document be uh..uh….faked or somethin….oh, as long as Frank J. declares it true with a .45 pointed at Dan Rather’s groin and his other hand on the Klingon version of the Koran.
HA! Clipart! Oh, deary me I liked that one!
Hmm, methinks I ought to investigate those Extra Spicy Nacho Doritos. I smell another award-winning documentary! (No wait, that’s just my triple croissan’wich.)
It was given to you from Dan Rather.
68% of all statistics quoted on the internet are made up. The other 42% are simply wrong.
Who hasn’t had #1 happen to them? There you are, merrily typing away anachronistic lies to further your ambitions, when Windows crashes and erases all your hard work? You have to manually reset Word to the default settings to get those “legit-looking” results you’re after! All these promises of stability in Windows XP and Service Pack 2, my foot. Where’s my forged documents, Microsoft? Huh? HUH!?!?!
Uh, guys, hate to tell you this, but the word you’re looking for is fictition. 68% of all statistics are pure fictition.
“Fictition.” Is that like “strategery?”
Klingon verion of the Koran?
This intrigues me…
On the other hand, maybe we should be thanking the forger/lier for so ablely exposing the utter DNC suckupness of Old Media.
Frank:
The best way to tell if the document was not typed in the seventies; it doesn’t reek of marijuana or there are no bong water stains.
I must say, that in the beginning, I had a moment of suspicision that it COULD have been a conservative looking to frame the liberals, but then I realized that that was loony, because trying to actually prove a connection between John Kerry or the DNC and those documents is a longshot. Don’t get me wrong; I totally believe that the DNC or the John Kerry campaign are responsible for giving those documents to CBS, but proving it would be very difficult sinc the media and the muckadoos like to stick together.
…way to tell a document wasn’t actually typed in the seventies….
It contains some of the following… LOL RGR ROFL WAFFLE 🙂 🙁 :/ Pr0n, or 1337/\355