I have this cool idea. You know how before we attack a place we drop leaflets of propaganda to get them on our side? Well, what if it doesn’t work? What’s the backup plan?
Here’s what I’m thinking: We drop leaflets on our enemies telling them not to be stupid and evil. If one of them reads the leaflet and says, “Bah! I’m not convinced,” the leaflet kills him! That’s because the leaflet is really a paper-think killbot activated by a dismissive attitude.
I know what you’re thinking: Obama is going to be president and he’s never going to go for an idea as kickass as that. That’s why we don’t tell him. We show him the killbot and say, “It’s just a regular leaflet. Nothing more.”
And he’ll just look it over and say, “Bah! I’m not convinced,” and then…
Oh no. That’s not going to work. I can see the headlines now:
“IDEA OF FRANK J. KILLS FIRST BLACK PRESIDENT: Race Relations Back to the Primitive Era of Early 2008”
This is why you don’t encourage me!
Will these paper-thin killbots have a preset kill limit? If so, it could be tough to beat any Zap Brannigan led army.
frank, frank, frank,
my prediction — visit from the secret service within the next 24 hours.
I swear, you’ve gotten much funner since Obama was elected.
We could always build more killbots!
Is there a minimum IQ threshold? I worry that there are people like Biden and Rosie O’Donnel whose brains don’t emit enough energy (dismissive or not) to trigger the ‘bot.
For Rosie we can just put a weight limit and she’ll be taken care of. Now Biden that’s a different story.
Be careful Frank, well funded national civilian security corps will come to pay a visit
“a paper-think killbot activated by a dismissive attitude”
As an engineer, I’d advocate a full sensor suite on that puppy:
* A sniffer to identify Joe “Stinky Dirty Shorts” Biden
* A fag detector to handle Barny Frank
* A calibrated BS sensor to recognize the Clintons
* A terrorist load cell for Bill Ayers
* A universal alcohol probe for Ted Kennedy (hurry up with that one)
* A CO2 sensor for gas bags like Al Gore
* A haven’t-got-a-clue thermistor for the new President
Frankly, I’m not convinced this will work, and may even endanger y —-
WHAM-O! Dismissed!
Actually, there’s no need to be that high-tech. Just drop the the leaflets while they are still tied in bundles or 20# reams of paper, then hire the environmentalist wackos to tote all that paper to the recycle bin.
Terizts gone, and a hippie has a job. Two birds.
Then Biden walks in (IQ threshold lowered to acceptable level) reads leaflet “Bah, I’m not convinced.” Followed by Rahm Emanuel, followed by the rest of the cabinet, followed by Pelosi…
I just don’t see the down-side.
[If we were to kill every political leader we disagree with, we’d be no better than Canadians. -Ed.]
“a paper-think killbot activated by a dismissive attitude”
As an engineer, you could have a full, miniature sensor suite on that puppy, Frank:
* A sniffer to identify Joe Biden
* A f^g (^a/^o) detector to handle Barny Frank
* A calibrated BS sensor to recognize the Clinton’s
* A terrorist load cell for Bill Ayers
* A universal alcohol probe for Ted Kennedy (hurry up with that one)
* An H2S/CO2 sensor for gas bags like Al Gore
* A haven’t-got-a-clue thermistor for the new President
That would be suite.
How can I donate to the printing of more leaflets?
I say we drop teeny tiny rubbers, very cheap ones made by some ChiComm operation. 1″ maximum from the DemocRATs! Then we drop Triple Black MAGS! 16″ers showing all women what conservative men are really like. Blam…we win the female vote 99%…considering the dike, hillary wing…
USSJC: If the women have a dismissive attitude towards your Triple Black MAG, does it explode like Frank’s letterbot?
The Unibomber would be seriously grieved about all this cool technology being packed into what would otherwise be a pretty bland and boring letterbomb.
Keep trying, Frank. Or whatever.
If you haven’t bought a shit load of ammo in the last few weeks you must be unarmed.
Venus, I’m delighted to see you …
Why not microprint it on shrapnel?
[If we were to kill every political leader we disagree with, we’d be no better than Canadians. -Ed.]
Now that comment was filled with awesomeness!
I’ll bet that when “Crazy Joe Biden” leaves Washington and goes back home, the average IQ in both places goes up! I love the Idea of the Kill Bot, but if there’s a BS filter, it might result in the wiping out of our entire Congress. But then, that might not be all bad. Hmmm.
This is quite possibly the single greatest invention since the invention of invention, unless somebody discovered invention and it was there the whole time be discovered… unless of course discovery was invented.
Wiping out all of Congress? I’d be laughing about it like the old lady from Mars Attacks: “THEY BLEW UP CONGRESS! HAHAHAHA!!!”