27 Comments

  1. … both hands, a flashlight, two teleprompters, Barney Frank for close-in support, Nancy Pelosi with stand-by rinsing douche, Harry Reid with Senate oversight (all giving contradictory directions), live media coverage by Chrissy “Tingle” Matthews, ranting analysis by Olbermann, and covered close-up and personal by Katie Couric with Dan Rather hotly breathing down her neck.

  2. >>>Unless he bangs the rim.

    Jimmy, I’ll be laughing at that for a while…

    While Obama would need a Sherpa Guide and a Magellan GPS to find his own ass, he seems to know exactly where mine is. His also seems to think I can pull an indefinite amount of tax money out of it.

  3. Was he trying to sign a bill with the flashlight? You know, invisible ink and all…..

    ON the other hand, if he did find his ass with a flashlight, it might keep him busy for a while and prevent him from doing anything destructive.

  4. BHO thinking to himself: I know it’s around here somewhere. Heh, Michelle always said I was descended from the Whatooshies. Oh wait, is this it? Nah, just the MSNBC web cam. I know it’s near the Presidential prostate, where did Mathews say he saw that? Fish Lips Olbermann’s kiss left a wet spot but that’s a wide search area to cover. Cheney! Yeah, he’s been riding it a lot. Bet it’s down there in Crawford with Bush. This calls for a cover up. Now where are my pants? Note to my own bad self: Schedule a wedgie from Pelosi and Reid. Oooohh look. Is that a bucket? Bet it’s hiding in there.

  5. As a diehard Republican, I hate blacks, Jews, all those of Asian or Hispanic descent and of course them Iraqis.

    I believe that on the third day, God created the Remington semi-automatic rifle: to fight the dinosaurs. And the homosexuals.

    I also believe in the idea of helping those who already have the means to help themselves.

  6. Thanks, Mike. Your ideas intrigue me, and I’d like to subscribe to your newsletter. All this time I’ve been a Republican, and never knew to hate all of those people you do. O’course, I thought God created the dinosaurs and then killed them with a big rock before Mr. Remington ever folded his first sword blade.

    Live and learn.

    Oh, and you guys, don’t respond to trolls. (Just practicing my Republican hypocrisy, which Mike forgot to mention.)

  7. Oh, I get it. Obama’s ass is analogous to his presidency: Full of crap, smells bad, and Barney Frank couldn’t wait to take control of it, while the flashlight is an obvious reference to his wandering around ignorantly in the dark.

    If the analogy somehow involved a chimp it would be better…it would give Al Sharpton something to do.

  8. Obama has no need to hunt. His head being up butt already he forms a human version of Kline bottle where he can contemplate his soul contemplating his soul …..comtemplating his soul.

    Or was that hole?

  9. USSJimmyC – Barney Fag won’t consider any flashlight for the “hide the flashlight” that is anything less than lantern battery capacity. He has plans for green butt energy but the republicans wreck em.

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