I should note that Buttercup is one quarter potato-licking drunkard.
Every time I see the movie title “The Lincoln Lawyer”, I wonder if it’s a sequel to “The Rural Juror.”
I’m confused by this NYT paywall; how much will I get paid to read Krugman?
Saint Patrick wasn’t an actual saint. In fact, most historians believe he was really a monkey.
You have to be careful with Irish history because of the lack of non-drunk observers.
Never paid attention to March Madness, but I always get hyped for April Angriness.
Helen Thomas is in the April issue of Playboy? I do not like the sound of that.
Do people still pay for issues of Playboy? I’ve heard rumors you can find nudie pictures for free on the internets.
What you can’t get for free on the internet: Interviews with Helen Thomas. Wait; yes you can. You just wouldn’t.
Random thought: Thanks, France and Great Britain for actually doing something! We may send some pilots over to help, but we may stand in the corner and cry instead.
Random thought: This morning I saw a Mallard and his mate walking up through the yard. She browsed around for nesting material in the gardens before they both flew away. He did what males are supposed to do: stand around and do nothing while wifey shops.
Fine and good, Mister Mallard, I respect you for that, but if you start foraging for vegetable seeds, it will get ugly here. That’s not a threat, it’s a promise.
“Never paid attention to March Madness, but I always get hyped for April Angriness.”
I’m kinda partial to May Mayhem and June Jauntyness myself.
“I should note that Buttercup is one quarter potato-licking drunkard.”
She is cuter than I am. Then again, an armadillo is cuter than I am. I didn’t wear any green yesterday, but since I’m 0% Irish it’s OK. By the way, I hear Obama is going to wear the very same outfit when he’s carnavalling in Rio. The Wookie will just be herself.
Wow, Heff is finally dating someone his own age.
April angriness? How about April Fool-ishness.
We’ve got a front row seat to Marko’s Mister Mallard watch.
Out here, it’s “Canadian Geese.” I scare ’em off by acting all crazy and stuff – which is normal for me, anyway (even at my age).
This cracked me up. Any time I hear “rural juror”, I always hear it in the voice of Rachel Dratch doing her Barbra Walters impression.
And 100% totally cute.
No, no, Frank. Buttercup doesn’t just lick potatoes. She eats ’em ALL GONE! You just wait.
“You have to be careful with Irish history because of the lack of non-drunk observers.”
My favorite story from Ireland’s glorious history was the one when everyone was having a few beverages at the Pub, when that one guy with the hair said something. And, nobody heard what he said except that other guy. And, they started pushing each other, then we all jumped in and beat him up. Then the police came, so we all ran into the woods behind the Pub. And, the next day we woke up in somebodies shed with a headache. Ahh, Ireland.
Son of Bob –
My favorite story from Ireland’s glorious history is about the bog-trotter who got so drunk that he kissed his wife and beat the Pope’s foot with a shovel.
Helen Thomas in Playboy…must erase from memory…do not picture this…do not let your mind go there…I’m not falling for it…my mind is a steel trap and it has slammed shut to prevent a circuit overload…no way…uh uh…nope…not going to picture that in my brain…stop…stop it now…Must go slam head in door jam several times…must stop image at eyeball and not let past to optical nerve or whatever might cause that picture to develop in my pea brain…stop!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
C’mon, guys, man up. The parts of Helen Thomas that we can’t see cannot possibly be worse than the parts that we can. Maybe you should cruise on over to National Geographic’s website and prepare yourselves mentally by looking at articles on Egyptian mummies (nekkid ones).
Princess Buttercup, don’t let Daddy dress you up in the Alien Antlers ever again.
April Angriness is caused by seeing how much taxes you have to pay on April 15th.
Bye baby bunting,
Daddy’s gone a’hunting
To get a little leprechaun skin
To wrap a baby bunting in!