* I have a new New York Post column. In it, I show that the double standard in the media is actually because the media loves us and thinks little of liberals.

“If there is a whiff of scandal — no matter how flimsy the evidence — the media will work overtime to see if there is anything to the scandal, because the media expect perfection from conservatives. That’s how much they believe in them.”

Actually, I’m just kind of tired about all the whining about the double standard. We get it. It’s been going on for like forever. And we’ve been succeeding despite it.

Hey, look! There’s now a picture of me on the online version (my picture has been accompanying my column in the physical paper for a while). Now you can just look at me and know it’s going to be a super smart column before you even start reading it.

* Things aren’t looking good for Cain. We actually have some specifics now. I’m not sure if it’s anything illegal, but it’s creepy if true. And even if it isn’t true, it looks like the end of Cain-mentum as he just doesn’t have the scandal-handling skills. Politics is for politicians, unfortunately.

Anyway, we know we’re going to nominate Romney and we can’t stop that, but I’m still willing to pretend we can get someone else. All we have left are Perry, who has a good resume but sounds like a drunk idiot in the debates, and Newt Gingrich, who’s smart except for some glaring flubs and has some weird past of his own. Do you know how Newt asked to divorce his wife while she was dying of cancer? Of course you do… even though it didn’t actually happen.

Grr… I hate Romney, but maybe he can have a fun VP pick like McCain did. Yay fun VP pick!

* Even if it means Romney as president, it still will be awesome to see Obama kicked out of the White House, at least. Right now, his administration is on record opposing adding FDR’s prayer to the WWII memorial. Here’s what Obama said about that:

“Prayers are the leading cause of bitterness and clinginess, so I oppose them in all venues. Mmm… waffles.”

Well, I don’t know if he actually said that, but we can safely assume he did at some fundraiser where press wasn’t allowed. One with a waffle bar.

* So what has Occupy Wall Street been up to lately? They’ve been using children as human shields to block traffic. Not great, not great. They’ve had a lice outbreak. Also not optimal. But have they gotten any of their demands met… or figured out what those demands are? That does not appear to be so. But rest assure they’ll stay put until… something.

The whole “We’re the 99%” slogan does seem like a desperate reassurance they’re not fringe weirdos.

* There’s talk that Eric Holder may use the Fast and Furious hearing to push for gun control. Well, here’s my idea to reduce gun deaths: Let’s get rid of this administration and replace it with one that won’t sell gun to Mexican drug cartels. That’s so crazy it just might work!

* Crowder visits Occupy Wall Street. If you’ve always wanted to see Crowder argue for Communism to a bystander, here you go:

* My book, Obama: The Greatest President in the History of Everything, will be out in one more week. Make sure you tell everyone about it. Everyone. And it’s only a $1.99, so no excuses will be accepted for not having bought it. Even if you don’t have a reader, you can read it on your computer screen or even in the in-browser reader Amazon offers. You are going to buy it on November 15th and then read it and then write a glowing review on every website that accepts them and then tell everyone you can find about it. That’s how it’s going to be, so just go ahead and keep November 15th clear.