Human Achievement Week: Cutting Steel With Bacon


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Bacon! There’s nothing it can’t do!

Except maybe get eaten by terrorists.

REMINDER: Alpha Proxima Day starts at midnight. Remember to turn on all your lights so we can make up for all the darkness-worshiping hippies who will kneel in supplication to Earth Hour tomorrow at 8:30pm.

Electric power plants create good-paying American jobs. Especially the filthy coal-fired ones. Keep the economy stimulated.

13 Comments

  1. I’m sure plenty of bacon gets eaten by terrorists if they eat anywhere near people who know about them.

    Now, voluntarily eating bacon, well, that’s not a limitation of bacon’s abilities- in fact you just defined a terrorist detector.

  2. Thanks for the headsup Harvey. I will make sure the air conditioning is working full blast, lights, TVs, Computers and any thing else I can find are on at 8:30. I might get out the deep fryer, the griddle the waffle iron and the mixer as well. I don’t know what we’ll be having but it will be made with good ol’ lectricity.

  3. Next Alpha Proxima Day we need to construct a giant Statue of Liberty made out of coal and crude oil, with an old-growth timber frame, bearing an oxy-methane torch wrapped in pork bellies from spotted owl and Koran-fed hogs, and illuminated by a few dozen industrial spotlights.

    It’ll be like the anti-burning man — the “Statue of No Limitations.”

    Anybody have Ted Nugent’s number?

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