Then I thought about what I’ve done with my dead cats. Usually either bury them in the flower bed or just let the vet send them to the rendering plant after they get put down.
There was also the time when I planted the dearly departed in a secret Micmac Indian burial ground, but I really don’t like to talk about that.
So I realized that turning your late animal companion into a cool toy might not be the worst thing you can do.
Also, Orville made a herd of cows panic and scatter [2:25]. How many cats get to do that?
Normally I don’t use videos as LOTD, but NewsBusters also includes a transcript, so you don’t actually have to listen to Dan Rather’s smug, sanctimonious voice as he speaks oh-so-reverently about the holy profession of journalism, and how incredibly unbiased journalists are.
Thanks to the Freedom of Information Act, we now have a complete list of words that – if found on your web site – will cause your jack-booted overlords to give a jack-boot-based low-five to your door and take you away to live on a small Caribbean island with terrorists and Marines.
On the “this has got to trigger a lot of false-positives” side, the list includes “pork”, “cloud”, and “Mexico”, which seems to imply that Homeland Security’s REAL job is tracking the migration patterns of flying pigs.
Well, gotta keep the snoops snooping, I guess, otherwise they’ll be forced to admit their uselessness and start competing with honest Americans for real jobs.
But what really surprised me were the words that WEREN’T on the list, even though they’re even more worrisome than international porcine aviation. Hopefully DHS will be adding these with all due haste:
______________
“‘Forward’ – Unless they’re reading the Wisconsin flag.”
1) NPR
2) Occupy
3) Patchouli
4) Patriarchal
5) Warming
6) Global
7) Man-Made
8) People’s
9) Discrimination
10) Teabagger
11) Renewable
12) Change
13) Greed
14) Unacceptable
15) Planet
16) Organic
17) Undocumented
18) 99%
19) Profiling
20) Feelings
______________
Also, Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.
What… I just really hate Dick van Dyke’s wretched cockney accent.
