… the convention will be declared a gun free zone, except for all of the bodyguards and security and officers……..But none of the regulars will get guns.
Debbie Wasserman-Schultz will be named Miss Congeniality, Barbara Mikulski will win the swimsuit competition, and Janet Napolitano will win the talent award for her campy performance of “I Enjoy Being a Girl”.
…the Convention will actually open with a mandatory prayer – prayer rugs and a compass so everyone can find Mecca will be provided in the Convention’s swag bags.
– It will open with a drum circle and the ceremonial feces dump on the president’s limo.
– new national anthem, by presidential decree, “Give Me Money” (Supreme court, of course, already ruled before the convention in favor of exemption from paying royalties under the “commerce clause”)
– and Eric Clapton said it best: “EWWWW That smell !!!”
Yeah, President Obama will be the Democratic nominee.
Hillary Clinton will be nominated.
No Democrat running for office other than Obama will be there.
Prominent Hollywood actor asked to make a speech will come out of the closet – as a Republican and say “Vote Romney!”
Michael Moore will serenade everyone as the Presidential organ monkey. They’ll feed him with bananas and socialized medicine.
…ObamaCare waivers for all sponsers!
the msm won’t be in the tank for obama
biden will be coherent
obama will forget to lie
john roberts will give the keynote speech
But nobody will be there to hear it.
You mean, besides riots.
Obama will skip the convention, citing a need to campaign and to distance himself from Biden.
…they’re going to realize how wrong they are, resign, and spend the rest of their lives fighting for smaller government to make amends.
Obama will state no further need for Presidential elections and declare himself King of America for life.
Chihuahua chalupas are back on the menu!
…under each seat, a bag of choom.
Obama to replace Big Sis with George Lopez.
Performing on a stool we’ve a sight to make you drool
Seven virgins and a mule, keep it cool, keep it cool
Actual Democrats will show up!
Hillary Clinton and Michelle Obama will have wardrobe malfunctions.
Obama will appear with a suprise guest, Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin. Together they will address the DNC guests:
Putin: Main Screen Turn on.
Obama: All Your Base are Belong to us. You have no chance to survive. Make your time.
Roseanne Barr will shriek our National Anthem and Tom Brokaw will claim that’s the best rendition he’s ever heard.
…they will not only be flying the American flag this year, but burning it.
…to be fair, they will be redistributing all the delegates votes evenly among all the Presidential candidates.
…Obama won’t be speaking since he feels he needs to distance himself from his own campaign.
… the convention will be declared a gun free zone, except for all of the bodyguards and security and officers……..But none of the regulars will get guns.
… Obama will confess that not only has he not given up his drug use, but he makes all his decisions while high.
… the Convention theme song will be The End bu the Doors, and, yes, that decision was made while he was high.
No knives or forks will be allowed at the convention. And spoons will be closely watched.
…Hillary shows up with her ‘reset’ button.
Michelle comes out as a dude! (cue crying game music) Half the male attendees throw up, the other half get excited.
Debbie Wasserman-Schultz will be named Miss Congeniality, Barbara Mikulski will win the swimsuit competition, and Janet Napolitano will win the talent award for her campy performance of “I Enjoy Being a Girl”.
Wookies will get the right to vote.
Guest speaker George Zimmerman
…John Roberts assured him that having an I.D. can be penalized but not taxed with removal of voting rights. Executive Order will soon follow.
…and Obama administration takes credit for a job saved or created at Cracker Jack. And for excited Joe Biden peeing his pants.
Obama will announce that instead of being half-black and half-white, he’s actually half-white and half-black.
Obama will appear on stage with a jar of cold cream and remove his black-face, revealing Jimmy Earl Carter.
…it turns out Romney bought the center and will evicting everyone during Obama’s speech. Mwah!
The democrats in attendance will all remove their fake humanoid skins to reveal they are, in fact, giant leaches.
The Nominee turned out to be Vladimir Putin.
…after everyone finishes eating their bath salts-laced tofu, Bill Ayers in spectacular fashion will blow up the convention center.
Jimmy Carter will give a speech in Depends that leak.
…the Convention will actually open with a mandatory prayer – prayer rugs and a compass so everyone can find Mecca will be provided in the Convention’s swag bags.
It’ll be *that* kind of party! Hit it! (cue the “Sexy and I Know It” music from the M and M commercial)
President Obama will take accountability for something he actually did wrong
President Obama won’t take credit for something the Bush administration did/made possible
He and Biden will do a “Magic Mike” routine
– It will open with a drum circle and the ceremonial feces dump on the president’s limo.
– new national anthem, by presidential decree, “Give Me Money” (Supreme court, of course, already ruled before the convention in favor of exemption from paying royalties under the “commerce clause”)
– and Eric Clapton said it best: “EWWWW That smell !!!”
…the checks won’t bounce.
…piñatas!
…Joe’s gonna be wearing his “Big Boy” pants.
…Debbie Wasserman Schultz is going to re-enact some of her scenes from “The Wild Thornberrys”
A convention producer will be heard on live television swearing about something a bit more important than the balloons and confetti missing their cue.
Nobody shows up .
Biden’s going to tell us who mouse is…or continue doing the Of Mice and Men Impression that is his life
And of course you will need to reelect Obama to find out what it is.
Obama announces his new running mate is Bernie Sanders.
“… Fellow Delegates, we present to you the next Vice President of teh United States:
Bwarney Fwank ….”
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