Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Why should you buy an internet-connected toothbrush?
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Why should you buy an internet-connected toothbrush?
…cause otherwise how will the NSA know if you brush your teeth?
Why should you buy an internet-connected toothbrush?
So you don’t get bluetooth!
…new HHS regulations will require it so that the government can make sure you’re complying with the new teeth brushing mandate
…so Google can shove ads directly down your throat.
..it’ll help with the NSA’s new terrorist profiling program because no brushing=no teeth=toothless hick clinging bitterly to guns and bible=TERRORIST!!!111!
Why should you buy an internet-connected toothbrush?
I haven’t the faintest idea why.
I hope it’s WiFi.
Cookies?
The Mob connected ones can get expensive.
4 out of 5 iDentists recommend it.
… for the same reason you’d get a wall-climbing lizard robot, I guess.
Why should you buy an internet-connected toothbrush?
Is it covered by Obamacare?
Because the Obama economy is so awesome, you have bushel-loads of cash to spend on pointless things.
…cause internet-connected toothpaste would be just plain silly.
All Previous Standard Toothbrushes Now Dentists Prohibit.
(Homemade butter toffee to anyone who gets that one.)
Of course it would have a direct link to facebook and twitter, and therefore save you a great deal of time, since you would no longer have to post a status update notifying your friends that you just brushed your teeth. Next is the internet-connected toilet…….
@10 OSI model.
@11: Correct. Even among this well-versed crowd, I expected that to be more obscure, though.
For the same reason HHS wants to know if you smoke or are overweight: for adjusting insurance premiums.
…because my floss is already connected, it just makes good sense.
@13 – I’m lost. Can I get a reference link over here?
I already wrap mine in foil to defeat such surveillance…
@16 it’s an acronym for the 7 layers of the networking OSI model.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/OSI_model
… to sync with the tracking chips already in my teeth.
(ref. 1)
So Amazon will know when to ship you more toothpaste.
Why should you buy an internet-connected toothbrush?
Hey, you want to put China out of work?
It is the most cost efficient way for NSA to maintain a current comprehensive DNA database of the citizens.
Because the NSA has already been in your other orifice?
Because dial-up is too slow?
How else are you going to watch cat videos in the morning?
To remove cookie crumbs from between your teeth and along the gum-line.
…Because 4 out of 5 NSA agents surveyed recommend internet-connected toothbrushes for the citizens they surveil.
…Because the alternative is the internet-connected rectal probe.
Because an Apple (TM) a day keeps the dentist away.
To share with all the world the word of Crest.
To double the amount of live streaming you can do in the bathroom.
… @26 might have been better with “applet.” …
Because you keep using that term, “user interface.” I do not think it means what you think it means.
In case you want to post tongue-in-cheek remarks.
Why should you buy an internet-connected toothbrush?
Because it goes well with Crelm Toothpaste. http://youtu.be/SUOJzYtdTKI
Because you’re an idiot?
Blue Teeth
So Nobamacare can have your DNA identity too! No more simple identity thieves for them…..
Because, in the long run, it’s cheaper than renting one.
Because your name is Shane MacGowan.
Because your name sounds feminine and Michael Moore has a tongue fetish.
Because those eyeballs in your mouth belong to your last victim.
You are a SEC fan and want to prove you are the one with a tooth.
… so that Obama can track all of the gold in your teeth.
So it can locate little pieces of food and send it to your phone – “The Storing, Finding & Picking Food App”.
… It can send the analysis of the crumbs in your teeth to the internet. Then, thousands of nerds working together will be able to crack the recipe for anonymiss cookies!
.. The CIA will be embarrassed if cavities end up revealing where they hid the bug in your fake tooth.
@16, 17: Specifically, the Application, Presentation, Session, Transport, Network, Datalink, and Physical layers. Of course, that’s not the acronym I was taught to memorize it by, by I can’t post that one without violating forum rules.
Why should you buy an internet-connected toothbrush?
Because the instructions on a box of toothpicks is too hard to read?
Because without it, I would end up on a ledge somewhere. Then they would bring me a stinking turkey sandwich.
So government can push dental hygene PSAs
So the government has another way of knowing when you are out of town. How often do you go out of town with your toothbrush?