So do you like feeling smarter? Just Ask IMAO Anything and you’ll be smarter for it.
Leave us a question in the comments, or email us at Ask.IMAO.Anything@gmail.com, and we’ll answer your question.
Since the IMAO audience is the smartest on earth, they’ll help answer your questions. For those they don’t answer, we’ll answer next time. Or, we’ll answer if further clarification is needed.
Here are the remaining questions from last edition.
walruskkkch: I’m thinking of a number, what is it?
It’s a unit belonging to an abstract mathematical system and subject to specified laws of succession, addition, and multiplication, but that’s not important right now. Tell the captain I must speak to him.
Oppo: Would a just God allow hipsters to continue to wear fedoras and soul patches?
No. He would allow them to wear Trilbys though. And the Devil would cause them to call the hats Fedoras rather than Trilbys because Trilbys sounds as stupid as they look. But Fedoras — actual Fedoras — rock.
Oppo: My God, what have I done?
Now that you know the difference between Trilbys and Fedoras, you’ll be okay. All is forgiven.
Oppo: Monaco . . . Liechtenstein . . . Burkina Faso . . . The Gambia . . . Seriously?
Nothing is that serious.
Oppo: Why so serious?
We just covered that.
Oppo: What’s Santa Claus doing now?
Planning his retirement.
Harvey: Was there ever a tenth reindeer?
Yes, but he was really the 11th. Nobody mentions the War Reindeer.
A special thanks — and bacon! — to the Moon Nukers who helped answer the questions last time:
- thebrickmoon
- Happy Fun Ball
- zzyzx
- CLIFFY
- walruskkkch
- Oppo
Remember, if you have a question, leave it in the comments and someone will answer it for you, either by replying to it in the comments, or I’ll offer an answer next time. Or, you can email us at Ask.IMAO.Anything@gmail.com and I’ll answer it next time.
That’s it? Are you running out of answers?
No. All the other questions were answered. Even one or two if these had answers, but I offered additional clarification on them.
Some waited until this morning to leave more questions, and I’ll catch those next time; I did the answers last night because in traveling today. Questions the morning if will likely get bumped to next time.
By the way, y’all are great at answering questions. I couldn’t be more proud.
Has anyone every actually danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?
Yo’ Mamma.
Am I the only one who got a chuckle out of that?
I smiled quietly to myself.
I did once. He may play a mean fiddle, but he’s a lousy dancer.
He’s easily beaten by young Georgian fiddlers in any musical duel.
How many cardinals are between countably-infinite and continuum?
If you could ask God a question what would it be?
If God were to ask you a question what would it be?
“If God were to ask you a question what would it be?”
“Are we awake?”
“If you could ask God a question what would it be?”
“I don’t know. Are we black?”
Don’t ask him what he thinks of you he may not give the answer that you want him to.
Oh, well…
“If you could ask God a question what would it be?”
“Why Pintos?”
“If God were to ask you a question what would it be?”
“Why Not?”
God’s actual reply: “The cars, the beans, or the horses?”
… accompanied by lightning, thunder, earthquakes, floods . . . real wrath of God stuff. For stumping him.
Do all mobsters, with the exception of those who spill them, walk around with beans?
{Follow-up question:}
For what purpose?
If you nix your moll getting the heat on the blower to rat but good on a torpedo for a fin, are you officially a mobster?
Only if the year is 1932.
I’m worried that my Garanimals might clash with Underoos. Can you suggest a way to simplify things further?
Grow up?
Does miasma affect my asthma?
Does my grain affect migraine?
Does the cold affect a cold?
Should I strain against eyestrain?
Was Queen Victoria the oldest menarche?
(I guess that isn’t true)
If my catarrh gently weeps
What’s a body to do?
Yes, no, maybe, but not necessarily in that order. Okay, next question. Next question please!
I’m easily confused so I need to know, what question should I ask?
What happens if I find a genie and ask for negative one wishes?
Would you tease a genie?
Are her feets too big for the bed?
Is it a plane? Is it a train? Is it Superman?
When did Gen X end and Gen Y begin?
Not that I care.
I have a question for you if ye be a man of valor.
Boxers or Lhasa Apsos?
Just a note to let you know that any questions after this point will be answered later in the week.
How much later my Lord?
Dammit!