[1976, working on Life of Brian]

High standard from John and Graham, Eric average and Terry’s and my first offering frankly bad. A poor rewrite of a poorly written original is never going to stand much chance before this audience — and it bombs embarrassingly.

A second very encouraging piece from John and Graham — about the crowd outside Brian’s home being talked to sharply by Brian’s mother.

My personal gloom finally lifted by the reading of our piece about Brian and Ben in the prison and the Centurion who can’t pronounce his ‘r’s. This five- or six-minute piece, read right at the end of the meeting, with both GC and JC poised to leave, really brings the house down. It could be pre-breaking-up hysteria, but it’s a good note to end this six-week writing stint.

— Michael Palin, Diaries 1969 – 1979: The Python Years

Then under whose authorization have I been shooting other countries’ and other planets’ stuff out of the sky all this time?

President Trump Signs Defense Bill Creating Space Force — First New Military Branch Since 1947
Breitbart | Dec 20, 2019 | Kristina Wong

ANDREWS AIR FORCE BASE, MARYLAND — Flanked by two fighter jets and in front of a giant American flag, President Trump on Friday signed the 2020 National Defense Authorization Act that officially created the Space Force, the sixth and first new military branch since 1947.

“For the first time since Truman, we will create a brand new American military service,” Trump said. “You will witness the birth of the Space Force. That’s a big moment and we’re all here for it.”

My #1 rejected submission to the Hallmark Card folks:

“Whatever you celebrate, unless it’s made-up Kwaanzaa or some religion that commands you to slay your neighbors, I invite you not to pound sand and enjoy merriment with those close to you!”

(A picture of holly and egg nog would accompany the text.)

Rejected submissions #2 and #3 were, admittedly, just long strings of curses. I don’t actually blame Hallmark at all for rejecting them.