A side: Get the Max for the Minimum: Steal Suitcase
B side: 76 Hand-Rolled Joints in the Big Charade
A side reprise: Steal Suitcase But This Time Fill It Up With Other Stolen Goods, Duh
Venezuelan Migrant Has Managed To Get Arrested 3 Times in 3 Months
CWB Chicago | January 24, 2024CHICAGO — Franklin Travieso Zerpa, a 31-year-old Venezuelan migrant living at the Standard Club shelter in the Loop, has managed to do something few native Chicagoans have done: get arrested three times in three months.
His local legal troubles began on October 30 after TJ Maxx employees allegedly saw him take a suitcase from a display, stuff it with items, and head for the door, according to a CPD arrest report. Charged with misdemeanor retail theft, he was released from the station a short time later.
Then, on December 21, Standard Club employees summoned police to the shelter after they allegedly saw a “large amount” of marijuana in his bag when he went through a security checkpoint. The staff gave police a box containing 76 hand-rolled cigarettes “suspected to be marijuana” that they seized from him, another CPD report said.
Zerpa allegedly told the officer that he had the 76 joints for “personal use” but conceded that he also sold them for $3 each, according to the report. He was charged with felony manufacture-delivery of cannabis.
With those cases still pending, Zerpa was arrested again Tuesday afternoon at Macy’s, 111 North State. A store security guard told police they saw Zerpa take a suitcase from a display, stuff it with $380 worth of clothing, and walk out the door, a third CPD report said.
He will be detained until he sees the two judges handling his other cases later this week.

You know what this situation calls for? One of those magnetic signs you put on the side of trucks, one that says “Vene” and sized just right to fit over the “Mexi” lettering on the side of the cannon. Well, and maybe a bit hotter load on the powder.
How incompetent can you be to actually get caught 3 times in Chicago? They don’t even arrest you for much of anything there.
Not to be confused with the famous composer – Frank Zappa.
“Venezuelan Stolen Suitcase Ganga” – a bold step in marijuana marketing …
Cue marching band..”.76 rolled joints in my kit today”..Robert Preston saying…”There’s trouble..Big Trouble..right here in every city…”