Straight Line of the Day: A Just-Released White House Email…

Posted on October 25, 2012 12:00 pm

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

A just-released White House email…

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39 Responses to “Straight Line of the Day: A Just-Released White House Email…”

  1. g says:

    …Shows the president responding to an offer for “all natural male enhancement”.

  2. DamnCat says:

    …displays the subject line “Plan for Second Term”. The body contains only the words “see attachment”. There is no attachment.

  3. Doug says:

    … was rejected as SPAM and was sent to JUNK MAIL.

  4. Dohtimes says:

    …that Hillary Clinton, as a woman, did not want to make decisions on the mens bodies in our Libyan embassy, she left it up to them to abort themselves or not.

    (…but she did send a box of condoms for protection.)

    …that Obama has 100% of the vote locked up in seven states, the names and locations of which will be released later.

  5. Mrs. C says:

    reveal they have found a way to get a $5M donation; but Obama won’t like it…

    =======================
    From: JBiden@WhiteHouse.gov
    To: WHStaff_ALL
    FW: RE: From the desk of Alan Smithe Esq.

    He guys, this prince needs our help! If we help him his family could fund all our campaign needs!

  6. hadsil says:

    . . . expresses condolences to a spike of missing dogs in Colorado recently.

  7. springeraz says:

    To: Plouffe, Axelrod

    Need more distractions. Jig is up re Benghazi lies. Send Biden out to say more stupid stuff.

  8. Wollf says:

    …reveals The pResident’s disappointment at finding that Bo has registered as a Republican.

    The Dinner Menu may well be changed.

  9. shane says:

    … links the Obama Administration to the deaths of Tupac AND Biggie…

  10. James says:

    …Biden assigned to judge 3rd grade geography contest.

  11. Fangbeer says:

    Guys, guys, I figured out how to save the election! We cancel it!

    Axlerod, draft me up a directive. Spin it to sound like we’re trying to reduce the deficit by reducing election spending.

    Carney, get out a story that claims Romeny’s already flushed away billions in election dollars while we’re donating our funds directly to the treasury.

    Biden, smash.

  12. Fangbeer says:

    FW:FW:FW:FW:FW:FW:Nigerian king needs your help!

    Joe, Check into this ASAP. My uncle says he has 16 Trillian dollars that he wants to give me.

  13. FormerHostage says:

    …states:
    Hello and greetings in the hope that this email finds you well. I am pleased and gratified to notify you that you are in recipt of 5M USD. In order to claim you prize please remit 200.00 USD in money order to the address below in order to process your claim…

  14. Fangbeer says:

    Awe man. I didn’t mean to steal that last one. Missed it when I skimmed the comments.

  15. FormerHostage says:

    Please remove me from your mail list. Thank you.

    h.clinton@whitehouse.gov

  16. FormerHostage says:

    …contains no content. (It’s an allegory!)

  17. rodney dill says:

    Mr. President,

    …now call Romney a Bullsh!tter

    Sincerely,
    TOTUS

  18. Vairish84 says:

    says not to take anything contained in this e-mail seriously, it is just an e-mail. If there were real information to be discussed, it would be leaked to the NY Times.

  19. Marc says:

    revealed that the email in Mrs. C’s (post 5) post was originally sent by the President’s brother.

  20. Writer says:

    …showed that the Obamanation had made a charitable contribution to Al Qaeda.

  21. AwesometificAmerican says:

    …was a request for the State Department to double check that “Romesia” is not an actual country because now is not a good time to have to be apologizing to them.

  22. blarg says:

    …shows that the White House has already started converting stationary and email clients to “President Romney”

    …proves that the President CAN, in fact, send and recieve email…like the ones from the Libyan Embassy.

  23. Jimmy says:

    …shows that Barack Obama is a spammer!

  24. Jimmy says:

    …contained the words, “spam spam eggs and spam – and waffles!”

  25. Bob in Feenicks says:

    …is from Amazon, stating that President Obama’s order of “Obama: The Greatest President in the History of Everything” has been confirmed.

  26. the roller says:

    Reelect me and maybe my well compensated friends will go to bat for YOU.

    http://www.comedycentral.com/video-clips/f8myiq/sports-show-with-norm-macdonald-wait-what—-gloria-allred-press-conference-antics

  27. Ironic Stompin' says:

    reads as follows, “Hey guys, it looks like I’ll be free for a while come January so why don’t you fly to Hawaii for a friendly Choom Gang reunion. Boy have I got stories for you. See you then, O.”

  28. CTCompromise says:

    A just-released White House email…announced that, according to VP Biden, the U.S. will withdraw all it’s troops from Iran by the end of this year.

  29. CTCompromise says:

    A just-released White House email…from FLOTUS asked that people stop suggesting she dress as a witch for Halloween.

  30. CTCompromise says:

    A just-released White House email…asked if anyone knew who ordered all the packing boxes.

  31. CTCompromise says:

    A just-released White House email…from Tim Gietner reminded everyone that job related moving expenses are tax deductible….to those who file taxes.

  32. Cliff says:

    ….who the hell is Deep Throat?!

  33. Iowa Jim says:

    . . . is an advertisement for Obama’s new line of microwavable meals; you eat and you eat and you eat and, in half an hour, you’re unemployed

  34. CarolyntheMommy says:

    … is a chain letter saying “Forward to 10 friends and you get free birth control.”

  35. Fly says:

    … that includes a FREE Diebold AccuVote trojan.

    Hm. “Trojan” is a terrible name for a condom — it suggests that it sneaks the guys in and then let’s them out to attack.

  36. rodney dill says:

    …along with the Obamaphone, we will supply the Obamadog to needy families, with included tub of government subsidized butter.

  37. archangel says:

    …confirms that “paul_ryan_shirtless.jpg” is the most forwarded attachment on their servers. “joe biden shirtless” has never been submitted as a search query.

  38. rodney dill says:

    EJECT EJECT EJECT

  39. IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged! links:

    [...] Keln of Nuking Politics picked his favorite punchlines to “A just-released White House email…” [...]

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