I found this editorial arguing that all other countries should be able to vote in the U.S. Presidential election since our decisions have effects on the rest of the world. To this columnist I say, dingus, the reason America is so powerful and domineering is because you guys all suck so much. You don’t get the vote for the same reason ants and bacteria don’t get to vote: you are small and insignificant, and we don’t want your suckitude rubbing off on us. Actually, it can be argued that the reason America is so great is because we don’t have people like those who populate other countries influencing us.
So stop trying to meddle in business where you’re not wanted, limey, and save your energy for cowering in fear at our every action.
First Blogiversary!
man, I’m cheesy.
Jaysus, Frank, there’s no need for that. Just get busy with SMITEing the Guardian’s office… the world will be a better place.
Silly limey, US votes are for US citizens. Duh!
Indeed you are. I say Mr. Freedland can can bite my shiny white pinky-toe. If it were up to the world to decide who America’s president would be, you can bet they’d pick someone like Kofi Annan. Or Yasser Arafat. The world loves America so much. You know, November 2nd, I’m just going to call up M. Dominique de Villepin and… hmm, what’s the name of that stupid pinky-toe-wipe president of France? You know, “le ver”… I guess that shows how important he is! Can’t remember the sucka’s name! Yeah, I’m gonna call them and ask who to vote for. Hmm, wonder what they’ll say?
What this article REALLY indicates is that the world is slowly coming to the realization that the only way Kerry can win is if foreign nations voted him in. And those certain “unnamed foreign leaders” who want Kerry in the Whitehouse whose names he can’t disclose (Kim Yong Il, anyone?) would be sure to select (not elect) Mr. John “I love America” Kerry.
As soon as they start paying taxes and sending volunteers to help us protect their sorry hides (as we are doing now for free) we’ll think about it. ‘Till then, Mr. Freedland, just shut up.
FrankJ…I had to email the bastard and tell him if he wants to vote in the U.S. elections, then come to America, go through the steps to become a citizen and renounce his current citizenship and then he can vote in our elections. I also may have said something along the lines of “PS: You’re an idiot”. Thanks for the info Frank.
Look, we screwed up in 1920 with the vote. I hope we learned from our mistsake.
“Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.”
As soon as I saw it was an article from The Guardian I knew I was in for a load of whining euroweenie nonsense. I don’t know how you read that stuff, Frank. If I get more than three sentences into a Guardian piece I end up trying to stab my monitor with the nearest object at hand (usually a pen, but once it was a pad of post-its … very tiring).
Anyway, Freedland is a jackass. “Being affected by America’s elections” doesn’t qualify one to vote in them. Tying your destiny to the well-being of our nation by living here, paying taxes, and being subject to American law does. If he wants to go through the process of becoming a citizen I’d be happy to let him vote afterwards. Until then he can shut his flapping piehole.
S
Sure let ’em vote, have a 10 buck pole tax that goes to the US treasury (or more modestly me). Since they have no congressmen or senators they wont have any votes in the electoral college. Let ’em vote until they’re blue in the face with holes in their pockets.
Let ’em vote…
We get to do the counting.
Anyone who thinks foreigners should be able to vote in our elections should be shot….
I took the liberty of writing him as well. I know this is a departure from funny but i felt inspired by his ignorance
about having a say in American govt.
Some interesting things that we Americans like to consider.
The oil for food program.
The impotence of the UN.
The 30 allied countries with us in Iraq and Afganastan who are part of the “world” you mention.
We do not ever care to get Frances permission to do anything. Ever.
We are sad that Germany was not with us but we understand.
We know John Kerry. Anyone outside our borders does not. As I do not know Tony Blair or your Queen.
Most of us allow our president to have a soul. The mainstream media in America and the world does not. So we take the time to dig for the truth in the heart of the man.
Every human life on this planet counts for us.
We give more money to the world than any other country
We volunteer more
We send more troops
We all want world peace
Most of us understand the price of our Freedom
Maybe you can put these things in your pipe and smoke them. Because you are absolutely high if you think we would let you have a say in our government.
-peace
I think UtahMan’s on to something here. If we let people in the rest of the world vote for President, they have to pay taxes and all that fun stuff. Then we supplant the UN (which oughtta take five minutes, tops) and the world falls under our rule.
Planet America. I could get to like it.
Just when I think I know how wise you are, you bust out this master theory
the reason America is so great is because we don’t have people like those who populate other countries influencing us.
My thoughts EXACTLY!!
that was me.
Not only do we need to keep other countries OUT of our politics, we need to keep certain elements WITHIN our great land away from the polls;
-The M.S.M.
-Michael Moore
-Chastity Bono
-Teletubbies (Oh, wait. That’s just Michael Moore wallowing in his own filth. Sorry)
-Hippies.
-The little man inside my colon.
-All celebrities!
…and the number one menace ot our democracy…
MEATCLOWNS!
Give ’em hell Frank J!
yep, let us annex your country and you become citizens and vote!
or, come here and become a citizen, and participate in the greatest experiment in democracy the world has ever known.
your call.
“Sure let ’em vote, have a 10 buck pole tax that goes to the US treasury (or more modestly me).”
Only a Pole tax? Why not a German tax? A Russian tax? A French tax? At least the Poles joined us in Afghanistan and Iraq.
They can get the right to vote the same way we did; namely, by killing Limeys.
Here would be MY response.
Dear Sirs.
America has an influence on the world because it is great.
You have no influence because you are not. You are crappy and smelly.
If we want to be crappy and smelly like you – we’ll call you and let you vote.
You cannot be trusted with firearms and pointy things. That’s why firearms are so limited where you live. Pointy things are coming up for a vote. You should vote in your own country where you can decide the pointy things on your own.
When people piss us off – we bomb them. When people piss YOU off they come over for tea and you discuss it in a calm and rational manner. Which is cool, but tea costs money and bombs are more fun.
When you confront an enemy – do you want to see glee in their eyes – or fear?
In conclusion. You Suck. USA rocks. Don’t mess with us or we’ll stomp on your f’in ass.
Guardian dickweeds like that are the reason that nukes are good to have around. Actually there are lots of reasons to have nukes around other than just watching them go off. Like J F’in sKerry’s future destroyed condo in Tehran but O I forgot they don’t speak pansy weasel French there amongst the MULLAHS. So f*** the Guardian piece of shit.
Any friggin foreigner who think they want to vote in the presidential election is both
A. sharing a brain cell with another foreigner
and
B. Hasn’t thought the argument through to it’s logical conclusion (or perhaps was physically incapable of doing so). A vote for president is a vote for commander-in-chief, therefore if they were to be able to vote for US president, they would have to submit to US rule. Lord knows we could make them anyway, but they would rather be welfare babies, sucking off the benefits of the existence of the US, but not having to work for it.
Of course Kerry would win if Europeans and other assorted foreigners could vote. But this is still too narrow. If the Planetary Federation could vote, Kucinich would win in a landslide, followed by Nader. Earthlings wouldn’t have a chance.
“You don’t get the vote for the same reason ants and bacteria don’t get to vote: you are small and insignificant, and we don’t want your suckitude rubbing off on us.”
Put that in the random quote generator 🙂
I just sent this clown an e-mail.
I did it BEFORE reading the comments in this thread, but I am heartened to see that many people here have come to the same conclusions that I did.
Anyway, here’s my e-mail to Mr Freedland: (long, sorry)
We should be so lucky that the “rest of the world” is actually “disenfranchised”. To be disenfranchised, you have to first have a legitimate vote.
How many countries on this Earth do not conduct legitimate elections? Should their “votes” count? If everyone in the world gets to vote in the US election, will everyone in the world now pay US income taxes? How about making every country in the world subject to US environmental regulations? How about minimum-wage or anti-discrimination regulations? Should India or China be able to summon massive amounts of votes while not living by the rules that US companies do?
Instead of reading your article as the worldly, sophisticated “modest proposal” that you try to package it as, I read it as whining.
Stamping-your-foot, holding-your-breath type of ineffective whining.
The United States has been and continues to be the greatest force for freedom and democracy that the world has ever seen. Instead of wishing to paralyze it by allowing the entire world to “vote” you should be wishing for it to succeed in promoting democracy and allowing more people to determine their own futures.
Your “modest proposal” is about as feasible as an 8-year old demanding to only eat candy for every meal. While allowing this to happen would bring quick satisfaction to the 8-year old, it would result in long-term damage to his health. In this case, YOU are that 8-year old and the US is your stern parent saying “No!” Believe it or not, in twenty years you will be saying “You know, they were right: eating candy for every meal and a world vote are BOTH stupid ideas”.
You can thank us whenever you feel comfortable doing so.
BTW, folks, just because they’re called Limeys doesn’t mean they like it when you try to squeeze them into your Corona. Wish someone had told me that before I went to England.
They could always choose to ratify our constitution you know…
So, not only do I like my idea of shooting them, I like rightwingduck’s thoughts as well.
I sent that turd pile a letter too and I incorporated some ideas from previous posts here.
Greetings From America
I just finished reading your ill conceived article on why dirty foreigners should be allowed to vote in American elections.
Please note that one of the reasons the United States is the greatest country in the history of mankind is because we exclude wankers such as you from our electoral process.
Furthermore we gained our right to self-governance by killing Limeys–
So unless you are willing to prove your worth to my homeland by shooting some panty waists with funny accents (everyone knows that American English as spoken in our mid-West is the purest form of English in the world today) we will have to decline your dumb-assed offer, you filthy animal.
If however you still feel compelled to involve yourself in American politics, I invite you to travel here on November 2 and show up at the polling place of your choice and then attempt to vote. When you are finally released from federal prison, after being repeatedly sodomized by your new husband, you will have plenty of fresh material for your next book on homosexual relationships. That should be a major best-seller in the UK as most of the men that I have met from your country do not seem to like women very much.
Have a nice day,
Jimmy the Clam
I’m sorry – this, this……”person!” simply makes me want to say…
“Hey, when America wants your opinion, we’ll give it to you!”
F***ing idiot…
Oh, just in case I wasn’t clear, I was referring to Jonathan Freedland…
Hmm, “Freedland” Freed land- oh, the comments THAT should encourage!
It should be the other way round: as the U.S have to clean up the mess for the others all the time, they should be able to have a vote in Europe’s elections!
I’m European myself, let me put it this way:
unfortunately a vast majority of my fellow Europeans are backward drugged psychotic whankers governed by totally incompetent socialist bureaucrats.
They are uncapable to understand that, had there been no America in the past, we’d now be insignificant lousy provinces in the third Reich or the Soviet Union.
But they always knew better, they’re always soooo much smarter than the stupid Americans (whereas they constantly called upon your help when they couldn’t solve their own problems like in Yugoslavia…).
At least the iraqi chief Allawi put it in the right way: “Thank you America”!
But still, these European Union perverted atheist weenies will always feel smarter than you and know better!
I’m from independent Switzerland (not a member in the European Union!), where democracy was imported from the U.S. successfully in 1848. May I say: Thank you America!
We are also affected by elections all over the world; do we get to vote in them? I’d like to see Chirac thrown out of office, so how about I get to vote in the French election? How about Saddam’s last “election;” did we get to vote in that one? I must have misplaced my ballot. It’s probably under my couch, along with my winning lottery ticket. Stupid couch.
To Carl Marx…yes sir you are welcome! And thank you for being intelligent. I have actually spoken to several Europeans who agree with you…one in particular…Aage Bjerre of Aages Pizza in Denmark…he refuses to serve Germans or French people in his restaurant because they don’t appreciate Americans! I HEART HIM!!!
Bandits, 5 o’clock…Don’t worry…we all know the British rock! Tony Blair is one of our all time heroes and no one in this world has been a more staunch ally than England. We have idiots here as well…thank you for your comments and thanks for being our friend. WE HEART LIMEYS!!
Frank, Please don’t link articles such as that. I homeschool my kids (so they are right here when I read) and they really don’t need to hear me swearing like that. I wrote to the author, but he must have some power over my mind … because all I could think of was “F- you” over and over again.
LOL, Rich … GREAT response (as I wrote above, I just keep repeating “F- you” sentiments, but don’t they like that in England?). One thought, though – I kinda like the idea of giving the vote to people who have no right to vote in their own countries! Poetic justice or something.
Good point, Bandits – it is fun to joke about the loons as long as we don’t generalize. Of course, most of the people raked over the coals around here are American, so the same applies for us …
Hey, I just had a revolutionary idea. America and Britain both support what the West Canadians have wanted for so long: a split from Eastern (Pinko Frenchy) Canada. The two become separate countries, and then West Canada, U.S., and U.K. can dump all their Michael Moore types into French Canada. That way, we can keep track of all of them and keep them centralized.
Any feedback from the Brits or our friends to the North would be appreciated.
Oh great,
As if MTV wasn’t encouraging enough idiots to vote, some goober wants to open up the option to idiots from the rest of the world… Oh lovely!
I know, I know, not all them foreigners are stupies, plenty of smart ones. But sadly there are plenty like this Freedland waste-of-skin guy that live by the: “I hate you because I am so envious of you, therefore I am going to drag you down in every vile way I can think of rather than improving my own country/self/whatever.” code.
You wanna vote in America’s elections? Well then become a Frickin’ American, otherwise… NO, you don’t get to vote with us!
And to quote the imortalized words of Cheney, “F*ck Off!!”
What a GREAT idea! Iraqi’s should have a voice when it comes to our election. I move that we annex Iraq as our fifty-second state (right after we finish off Puerto Rico), then they can vote. Wouldn’t it be ironic if England became an American colony?
Carin wrote: “all I could think of was “F- you” over and over again.”
Ditto. Oh, SO bloody ditto. Even the Moslems don’t make me this angry. These bloody European leeches live off the security we provide, demand a say in what we do without contributing anything to it, and then bitch at us for everything we do or don’t do regardless. At least the bloody Moslems just try to kill us. Y’know – at least they’re honest about it.
I can’t even begin to describe how much these bloody snivelling prostitutes infuriate me. (And I’m using the word “bloody” so much because I’m trying to be decent.) They don’t even have the guts to declare openly their hatred of us (although they sometimes come close). Frankly (sorry) I’m beginning to think that the only reasonable response to foreign people consists of tactical nukes and napalm. Doesn’t matter what the problem is, I’m pretty sure it can be solved with nukes and napalm. And if we really were anything like what they claim we are, God would be sorting them out right now and they’d be His problem rather than ours. Let them thank Providence they’re wrong.
Jesus, I think I’ll need three or four drinks before I can go to sleep tonight.
What more could you expect from a citizenry which lives under socialist rule and has forfeited their most basic rights to the government. If I had no real power in my own country to defend myself and property, if I had to pay unbelievable taxes to subsidize an ineffective healthcare system, if in my country there were only welfare recipients and the rich, I would want to force my will upon everyone else too. I would want to make everyone as miserable as I was.
But, wait a minute, on second thought I wouldn’t be like this. This is because I would never forfeit any of my rights willingly to begin with.
We’ve got our left wing nuts and I know this is the case in England as well. I know there are a great number of British people who support us in our endeavors as I served in the army with at least five different men from all over England. But this attitude is not uncommon among Europeans.
It shouldn’t surprise us to read this though. What with UN inspectors to be creeping around our polling places this year and what can only be described as a general jelousy of our society around the world, it was only a matter of time before some Euro-weenie stated this directly.
Too many of my relatives and the relatives of other Americans died cleaning up European messes and fanaticism. When the first American died because the Europeans couldn’t sort their own garbage, they lost any claim they had to what would begin to amount to an opinion in the internal affairs of the US.
Dear Mr. Freedland,
I truly enjoyed your homage to Swift. Your satire was audacious in its scope and subtle in its execution; many people mistook it for serious commentary.
I look forward to your next effort. Perhaps something about the unpleasantness in Darfur?
Kindest regards,
Chris Carter
Indiana, USA
Tell me he was kidding, guys. He had to have been kidding, right? Nobody could possibly be that moronic and survive until adulthood, could they?
We, the people of latin America, will invade the US until this country speak spanish !
We, the people of latin America, will invade the US with our wankers until this country speak spanish !
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