So here we go. They don’t actually have any singing competitions to get from the cut to 40 that they did last night to the cut to 24 that they’re doing tonight. It’s just something so the 40 kids can get really excited and think they made it, but then for 16 of them, the judges say, “Oh no, not you. Sorry to get you all lathered up for your deluxe pedicure just to tell you that you don’t even get a basic foot rub.”
Sanjaya Malakar. Of course, we know he’s going through. He’s a great voice. Could stand to eat a sandwich, because half of him is split off into his twin sister, but sings well whether he throws up all his meals or not. I kid; no, I’m not starting a rumor that he’s bulimic, I’m just making a joke that he’s skinny, give the poor kid a break. I’m just envious, come on! I’d kill for that fluffy hair, too! Anyway, he’s in.
Anna Kearns is the girl who says she’s 6’13” with heels or something, and I don’t think she’s going to Hollywood. And I’m right, she’s out.
Bernard Williams is someone I’ve never even seen, so I’m thinking he’s out. Yes, he’s out. Someone named Eric Davis is out. All of the contestants who are left are pretending to be sad when the contestants get eliminated, but really in their minds they’re saying, hey, that’s one more slot that’s open for me!
Oh, that makes me sad. Tami Gosnell is out. She’s the pedicab driver from what, San Francisco? Auditioned in Memphis or something? I don’t quite remember, but she was soulful, modest, original, I thought she was one of the better auditions, and definitely one of the better girls. Maybe she didn’t undress enough for the show. Shame on AI. I think I would have voted for her often.
Frank and I are wondering about the opera girl, Rachel Zevita, from New York. She was an early favorite of ours, and we haven’t heard anything of her since her audition. Nothing in Hollywood week that I remember. Her myspace page hasn’t been updated (Frank googled her, no, I’m not stalking her, so shut UP!).
Melinda Doolittle, the backup singer, is staying for the voting. Simon has very nice things to say to her and tells her it was unanimous, and she’s earned her spot at the front of the stage. Hugs and kisses all around. Mwah!
Brandon Rogers, the other backup singer, comes in, and they show his Hollywood week stuff. He is singing that Bryan Adams song about really loving a woman. Um, please keep him. Pleeeeeeeeeeeease. Yay! They’re keeping him!
The contestants so far seem more mature this year than last year. The ones they’re letting through, anyway. I mean voices, not necessarily attitudes. Or whatever. I’m judging before the first commercial break. Shut up SarahK. Shut UP!

Gina Glocksen made it through. They showed her singing in Hollywood week, and she was so good. I’m very happy she’s in. Simon is smiling as she’s running out the door holding her high heels. Fantastic. Congratulations.
Jimmy McNeal and Errick Johnson are out.
Haley Scarnato is in. She didn’t bother to dress up for the occasion. Most everyone else is dressed to impressed.
Philip Stacy. He’s that bast**d who missed his daughter’s birth to audition. If I hadn’t remembered that, I would really have wanted him to go through, because wow, I like his voice. But his priorities are all wrong, so I’m not a fan. He’s in the top 24. Woo frakkin hoo. I’m sure his neglected baby will be happy for him.
Frank is so envious that the contestants got to see the Simpsons movie.
Chris Sligh walks in and says to the judges, “You guys are probably wondering why I called this meeting today.” Frank and I are laughing. We think he is actually hilarious. Not one of those contestants who thinks he’s funny but falls flat. Chris is genuinely funny. Every time he speaks, we laugh. So we want him to stick around. Oh yeah, there’s also the singing. He’s great at that, too. We’re fans. Yay for Chris! I don’t know what Simon’s talking about with that “you’re not one of the better singers.” I differ. No begging. I just differ. Off you go, Simon. Anyway, he’s in.
Blake Lewis, the beatboxer who brings the ‘NSYNC factor to AI this year. He’s through. They haven’t showed much of his singing. I wish they would.
Thomas Lowe is out. Didn’t I read something about him? I don’t remember what.
Rudy Cardenas. They show him singing in Hollywood week, and I’d actually be ok with him staying. Nice high notes. And he stays.
Paul Kim insists on going barefoot every time he appears on the show. Oh good. We need someone pregnant in the AI kitchen. Fantastic. Also, he’ll always wear his lucky American Idol “draw’rs”. Whatever. Phony. ::eye roll:: He’s in the final 24. I am not crazy about the voice. Or the toenails for that matter. Moving on.
Jordan Sparks. They show her singing in Hollywood week, and she sounds great to me. She’s through to 24.
Olivia Quiba-Hurst and Tatiana McConnico are out. I kinda wanted Tatiana to go through just because I love her name. It’s all to do with my favorite author.
A.J. Tabaldo is through, but I sure hope he learns how to sing in Ingles before the voting starts, or I’ll have to learn how to dial in Espanol. Or I can just not vote for him.
Stephanie Edwards is in. Never heard of her.
Hershey’s All Natural Extra Dark Pure Mint Dark Chocolates are yummy. /product endorsement
Leslie Hunt is in. Judging by her Hollywood week singing, I’d have preferred Tami Gosnell.
Nick Pedro, who is all kinds of sexy (for the single ladies, of course — I wouldn’t know, because only Frank is sexy to me), is through. I’m glad of it.
Alaina Alexander sounds like she has potential. But she needs work. Randy’s really drawing it out, which means she’s in. And she’s in. They’re so predictable.
Y’all, Minerva is so funny. She jumped up on top of Rowdi’s crate and then started hissing and spitting at Rowdi through the afghan that’s on top of the crate. Rowdi’s so tired from going to the dog spa today that she was just like, “What the –? Ma, I just want to sleep. Can you just deal with this for me? I’m going back to sleep. Thanks.” And she grunted and rolled over. /Fleming house commentary
Chris Richardson has a Justin Timberlake in early ‘NSYNC days sound to his voice. Frank thinks he looks like K-Fed. That is uncalled-for. Oh I do love my Homedics Shiatsu Massaging Back Cushion. It rocks. That Chris Richardson fella is in.
Sabrina Sloan. I can tell from her H-week singing that she’s in. Simon tells her they’ve decided “not… to exclude” her.
Jerome Chism is out. Joelle James is out. Matt Buckstein the cowboy is out. I figured if he got this far, he’d make it. Princess Johnson is out.
Lakisha Jones. Wow, she’s dynamic. And she’s in.
Nicole Tranquillo is in. She’s interesting.
Jared Cotter is in. His Hollywood week singing didn’t sound that great to me. Good, not great.
Amy Krebs. Never seen her before. She sounds good. She’s in.
Last two guys, last two girls. They have to face off. Marisa Rhodes vs. Antonella Barba (BFF#2).
They wish each other luck on the elevator, of course, because the cameras are rolling. From everything I’ve heard, they both should have gone through, and there are several girls I would have picked off whose place Marisa should have taken. I think the judges missed the mark on her. Maybe there’s some behind the scenes drama we don’t know about, but hmm. They baffled me here. I don’t think that Antonella and Marisa should have been the last two girls standing. They should both be in. Hmm.
Last two guys. They could just spare us the drama, because we all know that Sundance is going through to the top 24. No brainer. Tommy Daniels is the other one. He was from the Seattle auditions and had lovely tone. Sundance was all over the place in Hollywood week, and the judges are going to put him through to the top 24 based on his very first audition. Honestly, I think Soulpatch Sundance has a great voice but probably should have been cut when he could never remember his words. But I guess the judges are going on the talent that they know is there, even though Soulpatch Head has a major nerves issue.
Wow, not a single blonde in the top 12 girls. For some reason, I’m feeling remarkably relieved about that. I wonder why.