A few weeks ago, I got a “Second Notice” from the Republican party. As I mentioned then, I’ve never been a member of the Republican party — or any political party, for that matter. So, why do they send me things that are written as if I’m a Republican? Probably because I sent money to two presidential candidates (Fred Thompson, then John McCain) this past election cycle.
Or, so I thought.
Turns out that there may be another reason. What’s that reason, you ask?
I’m glad you asked. The reason seems to be: they’re idiots. Or incompetent. Or incompetent idiots. Suffering from idiotic incompetence.
Why would I say such a thing?
I’m glad you asked. Even though it does seem that you ask a lot of questions.
I got another letter from the Republicans. Yay!
This one, though, is not just a “SECOND NOTICE,” as was the last one proclaimed in big red letters. This one came in one of those envelopes wit a big window on the front. Like you get from, oh, maybe the IRS or something.
And, it came with “OFFICIAL REPUBLICAN PARTY DOCUMENT – DO NOT DESTROY” above my address, clearly visible though the envelope.
And, it contained
NOTICE:
This SURVEY DOCUMENT IS REGISTERED IN YOUR NAME and must be accounted for upon completion of this project. If you choose not to participate in this crucial Republican Senate Leadership Survey, return this Survey Document at once using the postage-paid envelope provided.
Well, now. Isn’t that just special.
And, the pages of the form remind me of a Form 1040.
And, at the end, there was a place where I could fill out how much money I’d send them. Just like a Form 1040.
I haven’t received such an official document since Ed McMahon died.
Now, I certainly appreciate the appearance that they really care about what I think. But, I did a little checking on the Interwebz, and find they’ve been doing silly stuff like this for a bit. And, the thing is, they’ve been sending these out for years. And to many, many left–wing idiots.
Now, that makes me wonder: are they still just mailing stuff out to people that they don’t know who they are? Probably.
But, let’s imagine they’ve worked out all the bugs about who they mail these things to. The whole “official document” thing and “do not destroy” thing is … silly.
Or scary.
Depending on who does it, I suppose.
For instance, suppose I mailed out a bunch of things like that, and you got one. You’d think I was silly.
Then, suppose you lived in the Soviet Union in 1980, and got such a thing from The Party. Not so silly then. More scary.
And that’s the thing. The arrogance. Telling me I got to send this form back or account for it or something.
Now, I’m thinking about doing a YouTube of me burning it or feeding it to a goat or something.
This is why I’m not a Republican. I hang around smarter people than that.
Which explains why I steer clear of Democrats, too. And why I throw Holy Water at Ron Paul supporters.
I’m undecided about whether to do anything at all with this survey. Would my response really make a difference? Even if it didn’t, if I thought this was a meaningful part of the process, I’d participate.
So, what have I learned from this? Nothing. I already knew that the Republican party did silly stuff. Like help elect liberals and moderates, neither of which do anything useful.
Anyway, they’ve now spent all the money I sent them, asking me to send them more money.
If only they put that money into doing something useful.
I *so* want to see you make a YouTube viddy of the destruction of said silliness. PLEEEEEAAAAASE!!
*sigh* Sounds like you’re on the same mailing list I am, and for the same reasons.
My vote: Feed it to a goat.
My vote is to tie the letter to a rocket, like you would launch at a dry lake bed, get up on a three to four story building, aim the rocket at the ground, and make sure the rocket has a lot of power, then fire that baby and obliterate the rocket and the letter.
Same here – I’ve been getting stuff from RNC since donating to the McCain campaign. Here’s the thing: I only started donating after he picked Sarah Palin for VP – the only smart move he made in the entire campaign.
So how has the the RNC and much of the GOP party hierarchy treated Palin since? Pretty much the same way a baby treats a diaper. Every time I get a mailing from them it just reminds me of this fact and makes me regret ever donating money.
The last time I got involved campaigning for or contributing to “Republicans” was in 1980. It takes a lot to get me to do it. A lot. Ronald Reagan was “a lot.”
I got that same letter. I tossed it out. I’m a loner. I live by my own rules. You damn kids get off my lawn.
Glad I didn’t get an Axlerod email.
@ # 7
Try that with a DNC survey….. wind up in a “emergency center” admistered by the “civilian security service”.
Muuuwaaahahahahahaha
Whatever you decide to do with this Registered Document you should have a video recording device, two witnesses and a Notary Public present to satisfy the Accountablity requirement. If you decide to post it to YouTube, you should forward a link to the RNC. If you want to also send a link to flag@whitehouse.gov, you should include a scene of a cat eating a can of tuna to satify their “fishy” requirement.
Many years ago – more than I care to admit to any way, I registered to vote but had to pick a party because in my state you must be a member of a party in order to vote in the primaries. Since the options in the general and mid term elections had been somewhat dismal I chose the lesser of two evils.
I did not leave the Republican party, it left me, the day McCain and his governor friend hijacked the nomination. No matter which one of crowd I supported, I wanted a choice not a political convenience. Thanks to them the party was divided and ChimpyMacAcornarak is now sitting in the oval office trying to figure out how to get that bucket off his head.
So not only would I send back their stupid survey, I enclose a nice little note that says “when you can field a REAL conservative look me up, otherwise go soak your head in Obamas bucket.”
And no I not still bitter…………………….much anyway.
I gave money to the Reagan campaign back in 1980. For years and years afterward I received alarm-o-grams galore, every time Ted Kennedy belched or farted; fearful and fear-mongering missives in CAPITAL LETTERS of HORRIBLE things that were GOING to happen if I didn’t immediately send money in THE pre-paid envelope. (Sometimes the words IN capital letters seemed to be RANDOMLY selected.)
Eventually (read: after about 14 years – and KENNEDY changed into CLINTON) they stopped sending me these things. It’s possible that they realized the futility of their pleas. It is also possible that it is because I accepted a job in another state and moved. I have no idea what horrors the folks who bought my first house might be enduring.
But because of that, I will never, ever again respond to these types of solicitations.
I’ve gotten one of those survey requests since I’ve been living here in NM (which also coincided with my changing my TN absentee ballot address to my address here). Mine also asked me to enclose $25 for processing; or, if I returned it without filling it out, $10 to handle assigning it to someone else. It didn’t get filled out, and I kept my money.
The Republicans are closer to my views than are Democrats; it would be nice if they actually followed through on their campaign rhetoric, though, instead of becoming Democrat-lite once they get to Nashville or Washington.
I’ve received those letters I even got a picture of George and Laura Bush thanking me for my Grassroots support. Thing is I have NEVER contributed to any political party or candidate. I like to send all materials sent to me with a postage paid envelope right back to them. I stuff the letters and the envelope it came in into the postage paid one . I also like to add a note thanking them for paying the postage. It only takes one or two times and they stop.
Now, I certainly appreciate the appearance that they really care about what I think. But, I did a little checking on the Interwebz, and find they’ve been doing silly stuff like this for a bit. And, the thing is, they’ve been sending these out for years. And to many, many left-wing idiots.
Call me an idiot if you like, but I’m not the one sticking with a party that left my ideals long ago. I don’t like either the Repugnicans or the Democraps. But, the repugs have left their core constituency a long long time ago. The borrow and bomb repukes are actually now less fiscally conservative than the tax and spend liberals, though there are few true liberals out there today just as their are few true conservatives out there today.
The neocons have taken over the repugnican party and the democraps have become quite far right of center themselves. In fact, the whole nation has moved so far right that most people can’t even see the center anymore. Take a look at this graph of where the 2008 presidential candidates fall on the political compass, an interesting test that I recommend everyone take to find out where they really stand. You may be surprised.
http://politicalcompass.org/uselection2008
For my part, I happen to be both farther left and more socially liberal than Ghandi, Nelson Mandela, and the Dalai Lama. So calling me an extremist doesn’t bother me. Calling Obama left of center when he isn’t does bother me though.
@13 – absolutely correct.
I always send back postage paid envelopes. Usually with nothing in them. If you mail back the envelope they have to pay the postage. I figure it serves them right. I do this not only with political stuff but with all other mail solicitations as well.
Sigh….
This is it folks. You are seeing inside the mythical “Republican attack machine.”
They cannot find their ass with both hands.
It is sad that a small cabal of Northeastern Republicants hold most of the financial controls.
They live fat off of your donations and make terrible decisions election after election.
We haven’t had a landslide since I was a child. At that time, they lost some control of the party and it was for the better.
People have to write to the GOP and tell them to drop Norquist, stop attacking Palin and folks like David Frum need a shot across the bow that they are not on friendly terms with the elephants at the grassroots level.
That’s change we can believe in.
Yes we can.
I got one of those. I wrote PALIN 2012 on it and sent it back. Last week I got a big red FINAL NOTICE envelope. I’d write DID YA NOT GET MY LAST MEMO on it but that would be overkill.
@14
I took that test once. It pegged me as a cross between Adolf Hitler and Fonzi. Guess that’s about right. Good test.
Stuff those postage paid envelopes full– the heavier they are the more it costs for postage, and be polite always thank them for paying the postage.
So, since I’m on a conservative site, for a very big change for me, what does everyone here think of the fact that the Bushes have run this country into the ground with debt* aided by Reagan, Bush, Clinton, and Bush in deregulating everything hand over fist while both parties stuck with Reagan’s failed gush-up-economic policy long past the time anyone should have known that it was, exactly as Papa Bush said, voodoo economics?
* Papa Bush doubled the debt in just four years. W took a bit longer and didn’t quite manage to double it, but came close.
BTW, no matter who is in office for the foreseeable future, W has already raised your taxes. You’re just not paying for his folly just yet. But, you will. The bills must be paid … unless the U.S. declares bankruptcy. This is where the democraps have been more fiscally conservative. At least in recent years, they’ve mostly recognized that bills must be paid. Though that is not necessarily fiscally conservative, it is more so than the borrow and bomb philosophy of the repugnicans.
Too bad the democraps killed the party I actually liked, the Liberal party. Now I have to support (by default) those who killed my party since they’re at least less bad (or more accurately, less good at being bad) than the others.
[Since you are a batsh*t crazy liberal, we have already decided your entire premise is wrong. I did provide a link to your blog in my post, so that if anyone wants to know anything you have to say, they’ll click on it and read your nonsense.
If I was Frank (who pays for this Website), I’d tell you to quit leeching off this Website to spout your nonsense. But then, being a liberal, that’s all you know how to do. But I’m not Frank, so I won’t. Oh, I did post this at my own Website (which I do pay for), so don’t run over there to spout your nonsense. It’d be a bad business decision, since I have nowhere near the traffic Frank gets. But, if you knew anything about business, you wouldn’t be a liberal. – B]
I save all junk mail in a cardboard box (good kindling), steam off the stamps (if any), contribute on-line (if ever), and support my local church (you have to change their hearts before you can change their minds).
I view these types of mailings as yet further evidence that the Republican Party just doesn’t get it. I never give any money to the Republican Party, only to individual candidates regardless of their political party. I would advise that you place another piece of junk mail in the envelope and send it back to them in their postage paid envelope.
I should have known better than to ask a serious question on a right-wing site. I actually was not trying to be obnoxious at all. I was trying to have a conversation. I guess you wouldn’t know about that. If I’m batsh*t and crazy, why not explain your position instead of calling me names. Oh well. I guess I won’t get any insight into the right wing mind set here.
[For those following along: What passes for a “serious question” by a liberal is something that fits their small mindset. Liberals have opinions that they state as fact, and if you reject their premise, you don’t want a serious discussion.
Why are liberals that way? It’s not just liberals; it’s batsh*t crazy people, of which liberals are a subset. – B]
you gave money to McCain? And in the same paragraph call someone else inco…
Hey, your site, I’ll be good. That’s okay, I gave money to the role Thompson was playing too, so I’m no better.
Still, gotta say again. When you get ready to actually accomplish something, pick a party and hijack it, because fighting the parties will only end in tears. There’s just too many who won’t do the right thing, and will just vote like they always did.
I blame Iowa and New Hampshire. They should both be banned from American politics. There, I finally said it.
Put their photos on your bulletin board with a sign saying “Banned for life. Do not accept a Presidential Primary result from this state, ever.”
I get these mails from the GOP they directly into the shedder. The same goes for the DNC mailings I get. I’ve even got mailings from Ron Paul, I read them before I shred them. The Ron Paul mailing are at least good for a laugh. This week I got the David Axlerod e-mail it’s getting forwarded to flag@whitehouse.gov. I’ve never donated to any of these groups and never will.
Basil, you are one of my heros, like Anne, Michele, Jimmy and Mr. Reagan. Thanks.
25klrtz1, New Hampshire has been corrupted by the wretched refuse oozing across the border from mASSachusetts. Paradise Lost.>>>Fred Thompson didn’t make much of an effort up here. I think he doesn’t like the cold. The buffet of choices to vote for leads to ‘Independents’ tainting the vote, especially on the Republican side. Solution? Require independents to declare for one party or the other. I suspect Democrats in N.H., as ‘Independents’, took a Republican ballot in the Primary, and voted for McCain. Bastards! Buy Fred Thompson some heated socks and a goose down parka.
Just be glad you didn’t donate to Obama. He’d be asking you for an autocheck.
This stuff shouldn’t be taken too seriously. It’s all stuff they’ve learned from direct mail marketing. If it didn’t pay off for them, they wouldn’t do it. I treat it as friendly spam, and delete it.
I blame the GOP a lot for the present disaster in Washington, so I’m not inclined to give them any money and reserve my donations for individual candidates, especially since what I have to donate is such a pittance.
Ahhh! I stupidly sent money to Fred Thompson too (not stupid for supporting him… I think…just for giving Those People my name and address) and ended up on their stupid republican list for their bi-weekly begging.
But I fooled them.
I MOVED! HAH! Take that!
For a while I was getting Republican junk mail as registered letters, probably to convince me how important this all was or how important they are. Since I’m working, good conservative that I am, there is no one home to sign for these registered letters. Mr. Postman leaves a card instructing me to retrieve the letter at the Post Office.
This means a special trip on my lunch hour to get the Republicans’ junk mail. Clearly, they have no respect for my time.
They wouldn’t do it if it didn’t work and that’s the most depressingest thought really.
I hate mail. It takes takes takes way more than it gives. It’s just a failed institution. Look at those uniforms and tell me it’s not a failed institution. You can’t.
I sent $100 to the Bush campaign — the President George H.W. Bush, back in 1990: post-“read my lips” and pre-new taxes — and I’m STILL getting GOP mail! Imagine MY frustration (actually, you can imagine it TWICE, because I’m STILL not all that enamored with Democrats either!). I just send it back every time in the pre-paid envelope stating I won’t pay to have my opinion counted. I still get them, so either I’m winning, or they just don’t pay any attention to my actual response, which means I’m winning…
Circa 2005-2006 I twice got a survey questionnaire from the Democratic Party and Howard Dean, as I was a “leader in the community.” HAH- I think they just got a list of property owners. I hadn’t voted for a Democratic Presidential candidate since 1976, so I have no idea why I was selected. The survey also asked for $$$- surprise, surprise.
Very biased survey. The question on Iraq had choices that were all geared to how many months before withdrawal. No “get out when we win” option.
Most people seem to get only one or the other (DNC or RNC). Not really important, however.
We ELECT Representatives to VOTE our views in CONGRESS. We don’t need the DNC or RNC to use OUR money to BUY votes.
Citizens MUST TAKE BACK THEIR COUNTRY.
Hold YOUR OWN Town Hall meetings. Don’t invite the incumbent if they vote party over constituents.
Invite their opposition. Better yet, hold a citizen’s PERFORMANCE REVIEW of your elected officials. Include Federal, State, and Local officials as well.
You get a performance appraisal at work – why not Congress, State and Local officials as well.
It’s time loudmouth activists are pushed off the stage to let REAL CITIZENS speak for themselves.
Cancel all media subscriptions until 2010 election is over.
That will insure a more fair election. It will help to eliminate those who don’t contribute to growing GDP.
BLOG, TEXT, FAX, TWIT, CALL, WRITE, REBEL!
Our lefty troll friend should also realize this is not a serious site, this is a humor site. There are lots of places of on the internet where serious conservatives propose real, conservative solutions to America’s real problems. This is not one of them.
Here, we just make fun of lefties and advocate nuking the moon.
Think of these guys a a gang of homeless hanging out at the subway station. If you give one of them money, the rest surround you and start lunging at your wallet. If you give them money, you have only yourself to blame for what happens next.
It’s not just the RNC who sends out such overdone documents, overdone to look really, really official. And they annoy me as much as they annoy you. If I do give to the RNC, I will respond to one of their more banal mailings.
Probably because I used to the subscribe tot the Advocate (gay “news” magazine), I occasionally get fund solicitations from Democratic and pro-abortion outfits. And they overdo them as well, trying a bit too hard to look like they’re really, really, really official.
Kudos on this post. Well done!
To the contrary, methinks you take this way too seriously. It’s a direct mail piece, for Pete’s sake. Of course it’s “silly”. No one, least of all its authors, would claim otherwise. Its sole purpose is to elicit a response, to cut through the clutter and goose the response rate from 0.000002% to 0.000003%. From my experience, the GOP’s direct mail operation does try all kinds of ploys, and they are incredibly persistent even with small donors. They must get a decent ROI on this stuff. If they don’t, then it truly is silly.
No, it won’t be tallied (unless you count the lock-box people whose job it is to register the check and enter your name in to another database).
Sadly, I used to work in Republican fundraising. The ‘survey’ you received is from a firm called Response America (formerly Response Consulting) based in Arlington. It’s headed by Chip Gately and it’s his ‘signature’ package that ‘guarantee’s’ a 2-1 fundraising ration. The sad part it; it works. You can’t imagine how many of these things we’d draft and send out just to have Grandma send back $5.
I’d say call the party and have them remove your name, but unfortunately you’re now on the donor list for any Republican official in your area. This is one area where Republican’s have been a little more coordinated than Dems. The national party does weekly updates and downloads to all of their candidates mailing lists. So, you may get off the national list, but you’re now on all of the local lists. In better news, after 24 months, if you don’t give anything, they will finally start mailing you only 4x a year (it will say ‘reinstatement’ on those). After 72 months you’ll be purged for good (with a final – ‘LAST CHANCE’ teaser on that last letter).
Cheers,
Shawn
DamnCat says:
Same here – I’ve been getting stuff from RNC since donating to the McCain campaign. Here’s the thing: I only started donating after he picked Sarah Palin for VP – the only smart move he made in the entire campaign.
Yes, and yes again.
Besides the usual pleadings for “Mo’Money!” and panic-grams, the SOB’s had the nerve to send me a red letter with “Final Notice!” emblazoned upon it.
I thought about stuffing the SASE with roofer’s lead foil and returning it- but it would have been a poor waste of good materials.
If the GOP can’t quit running tired old retreads like McCain, and get behind Sarah, they are cooked.
I got the same “Do Not Destroy” survey/begging letter and was going to fill out the survey and send back with “NOT ONE MORE DIME” in red all over it. It sat on the table for a few days and in a fit of pique at the idiots in D.C. who brought us to this pass I finally tossed the whole thing in the trash. What are they going to do, turn me in to the pillow tag police?
I despise the Republicans. I just despise the Democrats more. Anything good happening in the Republican Party is coming from the roots. The tree is rotted at the top.
The GOP is no different, really, from many other fundraising organizations who spend your donations 3x over sending mailers back to you.
Just teaches you to not give folks money.
As others have pointed out the return envelope should be stuffed with something. It can also be opened up and taped to a box.
Fill box with rocks.
Leave note that said rocks are smarter than those sending out unsolicited mailings. That is, of course, George Hayduke advice that I just pass on for the amusement of the public.
Forget the parties. Here’s the real problem: http://www.opensecrets.org/bigpicture/reelect.php
Send it back. You must.
After it’s been in the bottom of a bird cage for a week.
The fastest way to put a stop to this is to put a brick in a box and tape the postage-paid return envelope to the box. The post office must deliver it, and the recipient must pay the postage for a brick.
I got one of those surveys, too. Never been a member of the Republican Party in my life. Due to peer pressure in high school, registered Democrat; then gained some sense a year later and registered Independent instead.
I filled out the survey. Because it was late at night and I was in a batty mood, I also commented it well. The questions were just so obviously slanted that it was almost painful just reading them. I particularly liked the choices at the end, where they want you to give money.
* Yes, I will give you money now
* Yes, I love the Republican Party and will probably give you money later
* “No, I want to keep electing liberal Democrats” to every office in the nation.
I almost added a “Hell No, I will not give you money and I don’t fit your stereotypes, you misogynistic mental pygmies”, but there wasn’t room, so I just crossed out “liberal Democrats” and filled in “No”.
Is there actually a good reason to maintain such a polarized mob mentality in this country? As far as I can tell, it’s causing us nothing but trouble.
I’d tape the postage paid return envelope to a brick and send it back to them.
I should have known better than to ask a serious question on a right-wing site.
No you didn’t. You dragged in a soapbox uninvited, climbed up on it, and proceeded to display your dazzling moral purity and superiority.
FOAD.
Take the postage paid envelope and stuff it with your other junk mail and send it back to them.
Without their survey of course.
The brick-in-a-box is a better idea.
Is this post supposed to be serious? You got an unsolicited survey from the Republican Party and you just felt that the letter’s tone was arrogant and boohoo why don’t you go in the corner and whine some more now, maybe swallow a few grams of snot down the back of your throat, maybe eat some cake, and get over it.
A political party is asking you for your opinion and you’re annoyed by it so you make a rather outlandish post like that?
The Republican Party doesn’t people like you, I don’t think. I’m sure if you sent them a letter back saying leave me alone they’d be more than happy to never speak to you again. You’re certainly an arrogant little snot Mr. Basil. How dare a party ask your opinion unsolicited. The sheer gall of such people! Perhaps since you gave money to Republicans they, you know, hold your opinion potentially valuable enough to ask you for it?
People need to start acting like adults and stop acting like some early-blooming 14 year old who thinks she’s God’s gift to humanity because all the seniors are hitting on her.
“This means a special trip on my lunch hour to get the Republicans’ junk mail. Clearly, they have no respect for my time.”
Just noticed this. Or, clearly, you don’t know how registered letters work.
GOP keeps betraying conservatives, by growing government and making it unaccountable, but conservatives keep electing them every time they get fed up with Democrats. I hope GOP doesn’t succeed at hijacking the Tea Party movement, town hall meetings, etc. It’s not about GOP vs.Democrats. It is politicians vs. citizens.
I’ve been registered as a Republican for a quarter century. Never got these mailings until I donated money.
Never responded to one of the mailings. A couple times I was thinking about it, but actually reading what they wrote convinced me otherwise.
“I should have known better than to ask a serious question on a right-wing site.”
You must have forgotten to hit the “Submit Comment” button on that. Your first post on this thread was just a collection of insults, and your second was insults plus lefty talking points.
What was the “serious question”?
I should have known better than to ask a serious question on a right-wing site.
That wasn’t a serious question, or even a question at all, it was a display of ignorance and mendacity with a question mark tacked on the end.