Michael Moore has a new movie coming out in which he’ll capitalistically make money off of gullible liberals’ hatred of capitalism. It would be cheap in response to just make fun of Michael Moore’s size, but it’s Friday and I don’t feel like thinking. So let’s pretend we’re writing an article about Michael Moore and we want to come up with a bunch of descriptive names for him so we don’t just keep calling him “Michael Moore”. Here I go:
DESCRIPTIVE NAMES FOR MICHAEL MOORE
* “the fat filmmaker”
* “the dumpy director”
* “the corpulent con-artist”
* “the rotund raconteur”
* “the flabby fabricator”
* “the blubbery blunderbuss”
* “the lard-filled liar”
* “the pudgy prevaricator”
* “the tubby tale-teller”
* “the hippo-like hypocrite”
* “fatty fatty fat fat”
How about “Micheal Moore Food Please” “The Lard Faced Liar” or “The Dude That Lies and Eats.”
Fatty boom-balatty
Dickhead
The Artsy A**hole
Artsy Fartsy F***wit
Celluloid Zero
Commie Capitalist
Whoops. I pretty much missed the whole “fat” thing and just called him names. Please pardon my mistake. Or not. Your call.
I was first, too. And second.
The Michigan Moon-pie
The Corpulent Conniver
The Distended Deluder
The Fatty from Flint
The Chunky Charlatan
Portly Progagandist
The Stout Swindler
I change my mind – I like “Fat lying hypocritical dickhead” – not clever but much more accurate.
* The artist formerly known as Fata$$.
* hippo-crite
* hippo-crate
* hypo-crate
* “The director, emanating a miasma of stale wine, butt, and stupidity, entered the building.”
It’s funny to go ironic and simple:
Slim
Spanish nicknames are also growing popularity:
El Pollo Gordo
fata$$ loser liberal
round retard
chunky commie
The one person that Will Rogers would hate on sight.
the fugliest fat face in follywood
the humongous hubrist
largest lard load
creepy corpusculous crapartist
* The reported love-child of Mama Cass and Orson Wells.
*Big stupid white guy (He must call otehr people that out of affection)
*Communist Fatloaf.
*The blob.
MICHAEL MOORE so fat people jog around her for exercise
MICHAEL MOORE so fat he went to the movies and sat next to everyone
MICHAEL MOORE so fat he has been declared a natural habitat for Condors
MICHAEL MOORE so fat he was floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her for then new world
MICHAEL MOORE so fat he lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy
MICHAEL MOORE so fat he goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says “okay!”
MICHAEL MOORE so fat when he wears a yellow raincoat, people said “Taxi!”
MICHAEL MOORE so fat he had to go to Sea World to get baptized
MICHAEL MOORE so fat he got to iron his pants on the driveway
MICHAEL MOORE so fat the highway patrol made him wear “Caution! Wide Turn”
MICHAEL MOORE so fat when he sits around the house, he SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!
MICHAEL MOORE so fat when he gets on the scale it says we don’t do livestock.
MICHAEL MOORE so fat he’s got his own area code!
MICHAEL MOORE so fat he looks like he’s smuggling a Volkswagon!
MICHAEL MOORE so fat whenever he goes to the beach the tide comes in!
MICHAEL MOORE so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the his good side!
MICHAEL MOORE so fat he’s got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!
MICHAEL MOORE so fat that his senior pictures had to be arial views!
MICHAEL MOORE so fat he sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw him in!
MICHAEL MOORE is so fat that he has is own zip code.
MICHAEL MOORE is so fat that when he wears a watch on each wrist and faces north, they’re in different time zones.
MICHAEL MOORE is so fat that even Rosie O’Donnell goes “Ewwwww!”
MICHAEL MOORE is so fat that whenever he walks backwards he’s required by law so say “Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep”
Completely off topic. I take a break and look at yesterday’s post and come back and some chick named Erica has cut the line! I WAS FIRST AND SECOND!!! WTF??? Come on! She didn’t call ‘Cutsies’ or nothing! Equal rights! I was First and Second, not Second and Third! Okay. Okay. Have it your way, Erica. I know where you comment. (Is that a real pic of you? You’re very cute. But a line cutter none-the-less).
Oh, yeah, how about “Porky Pig of Production.”
MICHAEL MOORE is so fat that he once said he’s “…not seen my willie in two years, which is long enough to declare it legally dead!”
plump propaganda propagator
That’s enough thinking for me to last the whole day, Frank.
Hey…anyone else notice that you never see Michael Moore and the Goodyear Blimp in the same room together?
Hmmmmmm……
Michael Moore is so fat that he’s suing the author of Garfield for using his likeness without permission.
Now I know why liberals make personal attacks instead of debating ideas…this is EASY!
And fun too! Maybe Sullivan has a point.
Only between his ears.
Jabba the Documentarian.
I cannot, for the life of me, see why my comment is awaiting moderation…………………….oh, there it is.
@ formerhostage: its because the Goodyear blimp doesn’t want to hurt Michael Moore’s feelings by making him look fatter than he already appears.
The bloviating blimp? …his shadow weighs 40 lbs.
Petulant Pustule of Propaganda
Whiny Wuss of the West
The Rotund Retard
Sweaty Shaman of Slander
Non-alliterative:
L’il Debbie’s Biggest Customer
Certa Sleepers Worst Nightmare
Walking Argument For Abortion
And the straightforward and honest: Fraudulent Hack
That’d be like making Whoopie Goldberg sound stupider than she already does.
Lard-assed Leftist
His Ckinese name: One tTn Lie
One date and Orca became the killer whale.
The Commie Calorie Collector
Michael More
Bozo Buffett Buster
Just a thought. ACORN is suing our two intrepid filmmakers because they filmed people without their permission.
A public school’s apology for the news of a bunch of youngster doing the Barry Obama cult-chant amounts to “the recording was unauthorized.”
Isn’t that how Moore got his start in what passes for his career – recording people by ambush without their permission?
Am I missing something here? Just a thought.
1 Tip of a flat belly:
cut down 3 lbs of your belly every week by using this 1 weird old tip
Umm. Is there any irony that this is the ad atop the comments?
Michael Moo-er
The Portly Piggish Progressive Pseudo-Pundit
As for his inexplicable following: The scavengers nibbling away at the bloated carcass.
Yo, Michael Moore be so fat dat he got more chins than da Chinese phone book!
Michael Moore is so fat his ass has its own congressman.
This guy falls into the same list as Lady Gaga and Kim Kardashian. That would be the “Why the hell would I care what that idiot thinks?” list.
* The Michigan State Statist (and fat)
* The fatty four-eyed fabricator
* The spongy Spartan
* The BMI-challenged bloviator
* The obese orator
* The gargantuan goof
* The juggy juggernaut
* The lumpy leftist
* The morbidly obese moron
* The double-chinned democrat
Michael Moore’s so fat he wears all black and trick-or-treats as outer space.
Cecil B. McButterpants
Michael Moore is so fat that last week he cut his finger and gravy came out.
Michael Moore: the Liberals own number one “One Man Methane Producer”…
Mr. ‘Farty Fart Fat Farty Fart Fart’
(Oh sorry forgot Jeneane Godawful-0, and Joy ‘Bah-cowher’
the big 3 Liberal Methane Producers)
If he’d shave that scraggly-ass beard of his and wear a top hat he’d look just like a stereotypical capitalist…on the other hand maybe he’d just look like Batman’s advisory The Penguin. Perhaps he’s just a man with a perverted sense of humor, like Batman’s other advisory The Joker. Actually, when you consider it….it’s the ultimate practical joke to make a ton of money from leftists paying to see a movie about the evils of making money….i.e. capitalism! So the Joker it is.
Fill him with Helium and enter him in the Macys Day Parade.
michael more is so fat, present hussein can hide behind him without his ears showing.
Ralph Bakshis’ retarded son.
The Human Mudslide.
It isn’t hard to imagine him shoving his arm into his body, pulling out gloppy innards and placing it on his skin where it will morph back into him. Remember that ep of Family Guy where Peter lost all his bones? There ya go.
I like Frank’s old description: an amorphous blob.
If Michael Moore was launched into space, the shade he would provide the earth would cause nuclear winters. Um, maybe that’s not such a great idea. Sorry.
I’m surprised Moore hasn’t gone against these enviro-freaks for trying to ban toilet paper. After all, it takes at least three rolls just to reach down there and a small backhoe to finish the job.
The Duplicitous Dirigible from Davison
The Fallacious Fatass from Flint
The Mendacious Manatee from Michigan
The Giant Socialist Weasel
Michael Moore is so fat, he’s on both sides of the debate!
The Lying Whiny Walrus
The Lying Richter Calibrator
The Lying Fumb Duck
The Lying Hippo-crit
The Lying Buffet Vaccum
The Lying Tide Influencer
The Fat Liar
Einstein found proof of his Unified Fat Theory by observing Michael Moore. Albert was killed soon after while trying to escape the assalanche at an all you can eat buffet.
MM doesn’t just have his own zip codes, he has separate post offices on each of his man boobs.
Although you can see MM’s head from the space shuttle, the orbit is too low to see the entire body.
#50 Tommy – he doesn’t use toilet paper, he has to use whole trees to wipe that behemoth behind.
Michael Moore is so fat that even his toilet shudders and cowers trying to wrench away.
The cetaceous cretin.
“he’ll capitalistically make money off of gullible liberals’ hatred”
When a Moore Film makes money then I’ll believe he’s a capitalist at heart.
Michael Moore is so fat, Rosie O’Donnel thinks its slimming to stand next to him.
FAT is bad enough—FAT, UGLY, DUMB and being a capitlistic-denying LIAR should qualify him for deportation to anywhere he DOEN’T want to go.THE lard assed liar belongs in hell .
To his credit, Moore consumes only 40 percent of the worlds food while producing 80 percent of the fat.
Atlas shrugged. Atlas was fatalistic and knew Michael Moore was hungry. Michael Moore smiled at Atlas and licked his lips in anticipation. Michael Moore thought “Man these lips are tasty.” Michael Moore ate the lips. A drooling Michael Moore looked again at Atlas, but did not smile.
M. Moore is like Schoedinger’s Cat: he is simultaneously both fat and thin, until we open the box and make an observation — then we find he is certainly fat. and ignorant.
FormerHostage says:
MICHAEL MOORE is so fat that even Rosie O’Donnell goes “Ewwwww!”
OK, you win with that one.
I happen to work with a “little person” aka midget. One day he came running up to me yelling “Boss da blimp, da blimp”. I looked out the window and it was just Michael Moore eating a box of donut, jelly filled no less.