Just so you know, Michelle Obama has declared childhood obesity a national security issue, so if you see any fat kids, report them to the FBI. If you think this isn’t serious, just imagine what 24 would be like if every time he was running someplace to stop terrorists, there were a bunch of fat kids waddling around in his way? Everyone would die.
Also, did you know that by 2025, scientists predict there will be so many fat kids that Twinkies will be almost unobtainable by the average man? This is an issue that effects everyone. I hope you’re taking it seriously. The White House sure is, and has even started replacing blaming Bush with blaming fat kids. Like when more job losses were announced, the White House said it was because fat kids ate them all.
Fat kiiiiiiids!!!!!!
Scientific studies prove without a doubt that children afflicted with obesity, or in layman’s terms ‘fat kids’, are a direct result of unchecked global warming which causes them to crave Big Mac’s, Whoppers, and Twinkies. Don’t ask me how this happens because it’s way too complicated for you to understand, just take my word for it. So too are all the blizzards and the cold weather afflicting the Midwest and East Coast, trust me on this. In fact I can’t think of any problem in this country that isn’t caused by global warming….A. Scientist, looking for more federal grants to study…you guessed it…global warming, Washington, DC.
What do we do Fat Kids who are also F…ing Retards! Is it then the R word or the F word?
Let she who is without a fat ass throw the first twinkie, that’s what I always say.
Amen, Veeshir!
As it says in the First Book of Burger Kings:
What do we do with fat kids who are also f**kin’ retards? We elect them to congress, that’s what we do with them….Jerrold Nadler, Congressman, New York.
I love fat kids.
ussjimmcarter, I have the answer for you. Fat Kids who are “F…ing Retards” are probably “FDR” = “F…ing Democrat Retards” (can’t help the FDR diss, although, technically, they’re F-FDR’s… Fat-F…ing Democrat Retards.)
What, Frank, is your opinion of fat dogs?
Fat kids are evil! Did you ever try to see-saw with a fat kid? I rest my case.
Methinks MBo’s hatred of fat kids is really an attack on the Secretary of State’s husband.Well, that and Klingons love themselves a litle BBQ fat human child. Tasty.
We got rid of all our snow by telling the fat kids there was a giant snowcone outside for them.
Meanshell should talk about fat kids, her fat a$$ has it’s own zip code
Meanshell a$$ has it’s own zip code and she’s complaining about fat kids
So…there’s all these fat kids allegedly……so why do I have to see that mother f&%#ing PSA Yomama does talking about how everyone in the country is starving to death (on FOX News no less)…..I wish they’d make up their minds.
Why are fat kids a “problem” but their big fat welfare leaching “mothers” aren’t? I wonder how much SSI you can get for having a fat kid?
There were fat kids in Russia once, Stalin took care of that problem. Considering all the Marxists in the White House, I’m surprised they haven’t thought of that solution.
Also, it seems to me that calling fat kids “obese” is very offensive and probably racist so as usual, they’re just adding to the “problem” by lowering the poor fat bastards self-esteem.
By the way, the “problem” is only partially caused by
global warmingclimate change, the main cause is skinny white girls, they’re evil, just ask any fat chick.I think Michelle’s slogan should be: “NO! Don’t even let them eat cake!”
If twinkies become unobtainable, they’ll all be buried under a giant tree and we’ll just send Marines to kill the giant blue people who float above’em.
The First wookie can have my donut when she pry’s it from my cold dead hand!!!
The article said the #1 reason applicants for military service are turned down is obesity.
Is the first lady concerned that o’s proposed Civilian Security Force will have to lower its standards?
If Twinkies become unavailable, the fatty fatty fat fats will just switch to Ho-Ho’s (or Susy-Q’s, my personal favorite).
Plenty of Twinkies for everyone, so fear not! The twinkie plant will even survive nuclear Armageddon, if you believe Peter and the rest of the Family Guy cast.
As for obesity, I once lost 70 pounds in just three months. It wasn’t easy losing it, and it was much easier gaining it back over the past 3 years, but I’m about to lose those same 70 pounds again, in about 3 months, again.
If an unemployed semi-nerd can lose 140 pounds (not to mention all the times I’ve lost those darn 20 pounds again and again and again), then there is no reason a fat 100 pound ten year old can’t lose enough to look OK in a Speedo (or a bikini, depending on gender, personal preference, and parental strictness) before summer.
And if enough kids take the “Speedo Challenge” there will be more Twinkies for us old farts.