[High Praise! to Keln]
Over at Nuking Politics, Keln noticed something that I’ve mentioned before: there’s a dearth of written humor in the right-wing blogosphere.
Well, he intends to do something about it.
He’s actively recruiting new talent to be guest posters and/or co-bloggers at his place.
All you have to do is send him an email with something funny that you wrote and fame and fortune are guaranteed!*
(*not a guarantee)
He’s especially interested in giving a break to you Moon Nukers who sit around making major funny in the comments at IMAO.
Get on stage and grab yourselves a little limelight.
As sort of a self-qualifying “Draw Cubby” humor test, try answering this one:
“Why did Obama cross the road?”
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]
Obama denies crossing the road. Despite the fact that he’s on the other side of the road, he claims he’s only there because George Bush crossed the road.
Chihuahua.
“In response to your question, I claim EXECUTIVE PRIVILEGE!”
So Romney could plow the road with him.
Ba da ding!
Because in 2006, he made it perfectly clear that no president should ever cross the road. Duh.
Obviously, we’re facing some serious headwinds, but we will not rest until we cross that road, despite Republican efforts to obstruct our progress at every turn.
It’s Bush asphalt.
Obama didn’t “cross” the road, he evolved to the other side of it.
Because EXECUTIVE PRIVILEDGE!!!11!!
Because STIMULOUS!!!!!!1!
Because there was a dog over there and he was hungry.
Jimmy for the WIN! Laughed out loud. Like for reals and everything.
Because he sliced very badly on the 6th tee.
Due to the obviously racist premise of the joke, i.e. the implied “chicken” subtext, this post has been reported to Obama’s Truth Team.
Fight back: Report an attack
To subsidize the chicken on the other side…which then declared bankruptcy
Because he
slicedsmelled very badly on the 6th tee and the others asked him to leave.Eric Holder was crying and he went after him.
That road is only there because of the failed economic policy of my predecessor. Despite those difficulties, I executed a well-thought-out plan to cross the road.
Because George Soros told him to.
The road crossing started with the Bush administration and that question is just a witch hunt during an election year.
Because that’s where the TelePrompTer is.
He thought he saw a foreign head of state to whom he had yet to bow.
Sean Penn was over there with campaign donation check.
Choom!
The question is racist and intends to belittle, bully and discredit roads.
The people on this side of the road expected him to understand basic math.
That’s what chapter 6 of “Rules for Radicals” told him to do.
Let me be clear; it was the right thing to do.
While he made a promise to cross, the duties of the presidency prevented it. However, he did send a tweet expressing support for the people on the other side of the road, so it’s all good.
There was no more wealth to spread around on this side.
Michelle was complaining about his flatulence and foot odor. Ran right out into traffic.
It wasn’t a road, per se. It was more a composite of several sidewalks, foot paths, the odd hallway and one staircase.
To get a new seam pressed into his mom jeans.
He saw Rev. Wright coming up the sidewalk.
. . . . . . I vote present
“Let the Record show that the Road Crossed him first”
Because the road represented the Capitalist system and, like the Constitution, presented a collection of negative prohibitions (e.g., no jaywalking and look both ways before crossing, Barry!).
In fact, it was the road that crossed him. And the road will never make that mistake again.
Because the car was in the ditch and the Republicans wouldn’t share their slurpies with him.
Because the high speed rail was broken.
He didn’t cross the road, the road crossed him
In order to tax it; spend it; stimulate it; and eventually claim executive privilege for it. Or as he said during the campaign he hoped to change it.
Hmmm, that’s a tough one. It would be easier if it were Eric Holder; then the answer would be, “Because Mexico is on the other side of the road
and he was bringing guns there!”
A: To get to the other ditch.
Alt A: Because he’s not a Muslim.
#1 it was the only way out of Kenya
#2 joe biden was on the other side, and we all know how he gets when loud cars honk around him
#3 he didnt want to cross the road, but it was one way he was attempting to compromise with congress.
#4 how else is he going to publish his 3rd memoir?
#4 dont question his reasons… that sounds like coded racism to me.
A: Because the car missed the dog.
A: He thought he spotted an unfleeced taxpayer hudling in the ditch, selfishly hoarding two kernals of corn.
A: Some undocumented citizens were sneaking along this side, and he didn’t want to interfere.
A: Some bonafide citizens were minding their own business on the other side, and HAD to be stopped.
A: There was an unregulated lemonaide stand, a direct threat to the SEIU. It had to be dealt with immediately, the Chicago way.
A: Secret Service agents were brawling on the original side.
A: It takes both sides of the road to transport that ego.
A: Let the man eat his waffle, you racist.
Actually the Road Double Crossed him first so technically he never moved.
THEY SAW HIM ROLLIN’… THEY HATIN.
Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » Straight Line of the Day: How Many Members of the Obama Administration Does It Take to Screw in a Light Bulb?
Sign said Constitution Ave. ahead so out of habit he detoured around it.
Because he saw something to tax.
Because he couldn’t see where he was going with that bucket stuck on his head.
To show how he could make those hard decisions.
Because it was an unprecedented first for an American President.
Because George Soros was working him like a finger puppet.
Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged!
To destroy the other side.
He didn’t! The other side came to him in a bipartisan show of support for his magnificence.
To bring both sides together. ha ha ha
To make history. It was fun while it lasted.
To dodge Michelle’s size 14 shoe.
Because he was stapled to the chicken.