According to James Carville’s polling firm, no one believe the economy is recovering. So Obama was elected because the economy was in bad shape and they wanted it fixed, and he didn’t fix it. So how do you make an argument for reelection? It’s like someone bought an Obama brand blender and it never successfully blended anything, so how do you convince them to buy another one?
You could try inflating expectations for the next one. “Yeah, that first blender was completely worthless, but buy another Obama brand blender and — even though it’s the exact same blender — I guarantee it will totally blend the hell out of everything this time!”
You could scare them about other blenders. “If you get a Romney brand blender, you’ll get your hand stuck in it and it will chop it up and you will die.”
You can just depress the consumer so they don’t expect anymore. “Well, there isn’t such a thing as a blender that actually blends. The Obama brand blender is the best there is, so never expect anything more.”
And you can call them racist. “You’re a racist.”
I’m not sure how well these ideas work because I’ve never sold broken blenders or incompetent candidates.
That part in Goonies where they threatened to put the kid’s hand in a blender scared the hell out of me as a child. So that argument might work against sissy 11-year-old boys.
In any blender, the blades don’t have any power to rotate on their own. They are controlled by that rubber thing underneath called a “soros.”
Come on, didn’t you end up trying to pimp McCain last time after he got the nomination? I mean McCain’s incompetence is orders of magnitude less than Obama’s, but still, McCain was a pretty crappy candidate.
My favorite website from last cycle was getdrunkandvoteformccain.com. Kind of summed up nicely the feelings of despair we all had.
Obama purees dogs in his blender.
It has one speed: mess it up bad.
But his vacuum cleaner sure sucks!
You can put a puppy in the blender and tell everyone that they don’t really want the blender to blend anything anyways. I think that’s where Team BO is headed this time around. They have to convince the electorate that we’re the problem so it’s either “You didn’t plug it into a government approved 120 volt outlet” or “You didn’t Hope for the power of the blender enough the first time around” or “It’s a good thing I saved Mitt Romney from blending this cute little puppy”. Which one do you think the democrat base will gel around most?
Conservatives will not change their opinion of BO no matter how cute the puppy is and liberals can yell at the conservatives for putting the puppy in the blender in the first place despite the fact that the blender has been in BO’s kitchen for the past 3 1/2 years.
All we have to do is remind people that Barry is the only one of the major candidates who has admitted to eating dogs in his lifetime and ‘Murica will make the right decision.
You could blame all those 1% who have food processors for using all the electricity so that there wasn’t enough to run the blender.
The Nobama blender started the job but you need to buy a second Nobama blender to complete what we have all started together. Don’t give in to those evil 1% GOP blenders that are doing all the actual work.
Ironically, in recent polling it was determined that if the election was held today likely voters would vote overwhelmingly for a blender over Barack Obama.
cptnmoroni (“You didn’t plug it into a government approved 120 volt outlet”) and FormerHostage (all those 1% who have food processors used all the electricity so that there wasn’t enough to run the blender) are on a similar wavelength to mine: The blender doesn’t work because Bush! sabotaged the house with incompatible wiring, which will take YEARS to fix. We’re almost there, though, so go ahead and buy that second blender. (The basic theme here is that evil/stupid/greedy people are preventing the blender from working. You don’t want to be one of those, do you? Prove it! Buy another blender!)
I don’t want to overly scare anybody but I think it might be approprate to remind people that Bill Clinton was the absolute worst Governor the state of Arkansas ever had and they drummed him out of office after his first term. He went on television and apologized for being such a horrible Governor and asked for a second chance to do better… and was re-elected. Voters can’t always be counted on to have good sense.