[High Praise! to Liberal Logic 101]

Anonymiss of Nuking Politics picked her favorite punchlines to To Avoid Being Spied on by the Government, Experts Recommend…
Click here to see if you made the cut.
If you did, you should probably email Keln about becoming a guest blogger there.
If you didn’t, Anonymiss has got another straight line for you to practice on.
Keep trying. No one likes a quitter.
A team at the University of Washington has rigged a standard Wi-Fi home network to detect your movements anywhere in the home and convert them into commands to control connected devices.
This sounds really cool. Now I’ll be able to turn off an Obama speech with just one finger.
[High Praise! to 4of7 and John Hawkins]
20 Basic Truths You Can’t Talk About in America Anymore
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]
Looking forward to the Edward Snowden downloadable content for “Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego?”
— John Hayward (@Doc_0) June 12, 2013
Why buy an expensive massage chair when I can throw a few cats in a bean bag chair for FREE?
— Matt Roller (@rolldiggity) June 12, 2013
The groove is in the heart. A congenital defect. You have maybe 6 weeks to live.
— Eli Terry (@EliTerry) June 12, 2013
My obituary will read, “He never knew how to work blinds.”
— Sean Gabay (@ixSEANxi) June 12, 2013
Best part of “Man of Steel”?: Adam West shows up at the end to talk to Superman about the “Justice League Initiative”.
— Mark Leggett (@markleggett) June 12, 2013
A new report shows that an EPA warehouse contained hidden rooms full of exercise equipment, televisions, and couches.
It’s like a secret lair for Batman villain “The Bureaucrat”.
The evangelists’ success points to a hunger for the product they are selling, a hunger that goes beyond any particular issue or cause. They need an assurance that somebody out there cares about them, is listening to them.
BARACK OBAMA, The Audacity of Hope
“And I can assure you, people ARE listening. Listening VERY carefully…”
A lot of people have been talking about this Gallup poll where Bush is now more popular than Obama. I didn’t get too excited about it, though. For one, it’s Gallup, and going by their record of accuracy, we can’t even be sure there was a president Bush. And second, this is expected, as you’ll always have a worse opinion of the guy currently giving you a beating.
Still, the negative opinions of Bush by the end of his term were a bit over the top crazy. And the high opinions of Obama never made sense versus reality. So this change in opinion could just be people being more sensible about things. And much of what the left used to freak out over about Bush, Obama has now continued and made even more extreme. So if they want to defend Obama, they can’t act like Bush was awful anymore. In fact, they basically have to argue that the problem with Bush was he didn’t go far enough. “That stupid Bushitler! He should have blown up more Americans without trial!”
And if Obama wanted people to have a higher opinion of him, he shouldn’t have been reelected. It would be easier for people to argue that Obama was better than we gave him credit for if there wasn’t this second term to confirm how awful he is.
I wonder if opinion will go up for Obama after he’s out of office? I guess it would kind of be like how traumatic a traffic accident is once you’re in it, but years later you can look back and say, “That was an interesting time.”
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
A California school is holding a toy gun buyback. You should also turn in…
Is it just me, or has it been a while since I wrote column? I guess I got lazy with the whole “new kid” thing and some other projects (one of these days, my fiction is going to get published and it’s going to be awesome!). And people around me in Idaho don’t believe I’m a columnist anymore. I try to explain to them, “In New York City there is like a paper and you’ll find me in it.” And then I try to explain to them about New York City with its tall buildings and shiny lights, but they don’t believe me. And they don’t have the internet here in Idaho to check it out; we just exchange information by writing things down on potatoes and chucking them at each other.
But enough about me. Let’s instead talk about me. So, I have a new column in the New York Post about how I’m getting worried about how isolated, paranoid our government is getting. Frankly, it’s becoming an anti-citizen extremist.
The feds have shown warning signs for years, becoming increasingly withdrawn, hunkered down in their bunkers in DC. They’re disconnected from what’s going on in the rest of the country, getting their news only from extremist sources like Media Matters, MSNBC and The New York Times. And in their fear and isolation, federal workers seem willing to believe almost any crazy conspiracy theory about the American public — such as that everyone is secretly racist against the president and that people are going to form militias to fight the government.
Read. Enjoy. Share. Discuss.
Kids’ music today is awful and their Lego figurines are too angry.
Idea: Amnesty for all! You just have to go this booth we set up in Mexico to sign up…
We opened ourselves up for these border problems when we let other nations be contiguous to us.
The left better be sure debt won’t collapse the government, because how long will they last with a bunch of angry, armed conservatives and no rule of law?
On the Tonight Show, Jay Leno joked that Obama should close the IRS instead of Gitmo.
Nah. The IRS just needs more barbed wire and a 90-mile moat.