27 Comments

  1. The one must-have provision that should be in the Republican health care bill…

    Congress shall make no law providing for, pertaining to, administrive of, regulating, organizing or in any way, shape or form using public funds or the legal sanction of the government for the purpose of providing Health Care or health insurance to citizens of the United States.Being applicable within the confines of the United States border or any area under United States jurisdiction and any United States Citizen who argues for, opines for, or wishes to establish such a system, use of the public fisc or provide for it under legal statue shall be shot.

    I’m pretty cool about anything else.

    • The left is going to complain about using guns, they really don’t like them. Even less when they are turned against them and their feelings.

      How about changing that last bit to ….shall be hung from the neck until dead.

      Personally I would add ‘in the public square’ but these days too few places have an actual public square, which I find to be a real shame.

      • Well if one must defer to liberal sensibilities to get this passed I will allow the substitution of “garrote” for being “shot”. Certainly live on TV should suffice to replace the public square of yore.

      • Hanging from the neck until dead is a racist trigger, you h8er. I suggest: “. . . any United States Citizen who argues for, opines for, or wishes to establish such a system, use of the public fisc or provide for it under legal statute [fixed it] shall be forced to walk on the streets of Berkeley, California wearing a red MAGA hat and an I ‘heart’ Trump tee-shirt, holding placards saying ‘It’s a child, not a choice – ALL lives matter!’ and ‘Build the Wall!’ Let the libs thin their own herd.

  2. The entire bill should consist of the phrase “Repeal and . . . okay, we’re done.” To paraphrase someone, I think the Ace of Spades, “You don’t ask your oncologist to ‘replace’ the tumor he just removed.”

  3. … that these united States are, and of the Right ought to be, Free and Independent States; that they are absolved from all Allegiance to the Brutish Crowd; and that all political Connection between them and the State of Great Butt-Ins is and ought to be totally dissolved.

  4. … should be in Article 1:

    Section 1: “If you confuse Health Care with Health Insurance, skip to Section 2.”

    Section 2: Get a dictionary and refer to Section 1, if necessary.

    For those who eventually make it to Section 3:

    Section 3 : Open the dictionary. If you define “insurance” as “a command to cover a pre-existing condition,” you shall be “Huh?”d by the Nyuck until “Duh”d.

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