Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Amazon is creating a health care company. Among it’s innovative features…
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Amazon is creating a health care company. Among it’s innovative features…
…Alexa can remotely raise your blood pressure.
Amazon is creating a health care company. Among it’s innovative features…
the home surgery kits can be ordered with the “Expert Installation” option.
Amazon is creating a health care company. Among it’s innovative features…
the costs will be covered by Obamacare. After a huge deductible.
Amazon is creating a health care company. Among it’s innovative features…
drone delivered colonoscopies.
Obstetrics plan comes with free delivery
You can pay extra for same day.
And for the liberals, free returns.
…by US Postal Service..
When it positively has reasonable odds of getting there in an acceptable amount of time and condition.
….is flying power chairs.
Amazon is creating a health care company. Among it’s innovative features…
the customer is always right.
Good news: all your medications are only $99 a year.
Bad news: your medications all take 2 days to kick in
… flu shots delivered to your Kindle device.
…instant access to drugs you might like based on your previous usage…
Based on your previous purchases you may be interested in this procedure.
You will get your prescriptions and medical devices next day, but the driver will still poop at the curb.
…are Amazon nurses. If you know what I mean.
I hope someone does because I’m completely lost.
Depends upon if you mean Amazon supplying the nurses or if you mean Nurses who are Amazons. Choose wisely.
A Playlist based on how you’re feeling that day.
X-rays and test results sent to your Kindle
Treatments featured as Golden Box specials
An Echo cardiogram . . .
and a snappy jingle —
Mister Postman look and see
Is there Alexa in your bag for me?
I been waiting such a long time
Since I heard from that nurse online
There must be some word today
From MyAmazon so far away
Please Mister Postman look and see
If there’s a little Allegra for me?
I been standing here waiting Mister Postman
So-o-o-o patiently
Just charge my card for a doctor’s letter
But say it’s not coming C.O.D.
… …
“Doctor my iPhone’s on the blink
With the slow iPhone uplink, they’re not trying
Now I want to up my plan
I have done all that I could
To steer you to my neighborhood; I’m not hiding
You must Yelp me if you can . . . “
Amazon is creating a health care company. Among it’s innovative features…
their App will now be included on all Obamaphones.
Commercial for AMedZon.com:
Joan was practical
Had her prophylactical
Needs shipped to her home;
Late nights all alone
On the YouTube, oh, oh oh oh
Time to jettison
Major-market medicine
Call us on the phone!!
Just like take-out, get your prescription
Of methado-oh-oh-one
I assume that Sandra Fluke’s contraception orders will be randomly placed on someone else’s bill.
“Alexa, why does it hurt when I pee?”
Did you want John Hurt’s IP address?
“Have You Personally Been Healed By Bezos?”
Be the first on your block to get your lifesaving PIN!
“Bing’s my friend, and so’s UHaul” — Doctor Robot
“Day or night, order any time at all!” — Doctor Robot
Doctor Robot, it’s a new and better con:
They’ll help you at Amazon
Doing everything from Taiwan, Doctor Robot
If your chips are down they’ll look you up, Doctor Robot
Take a drink? They’ll Beam that up, Doctor Robot
Doctor Robert, a sham-man you must believe
Helping everyone in need
No one can succeed like Doctor Robot
Well, well, well, you’re feeling fined
Well, well, well, he’ll make you… Doctor Robot
My friend works on the national health, Doctor Robot
You’ll pay money just to shield yourself from Doctor Robot
Doctor Robert, you’ll renew a better plan
He helps you to understand
Until there is a ban, Doctor Robot
Well, well, well, you’re feeling fined
Well, well, well, he’ll disconect you… Doctor Robot
Pinged my friend, I said, don’t call Doctor Robot
Pinged my friend, I said, don’t call Doctor Robot
Doctor Robot
All our goods ship,
Mom and Pop:
It’s a mouse click
To our countertop
Let PayPal pay —
What the heck, it’s gotta beat eBay.
Medicaid and
Medicare
Phoned-in droned brands
Fill the air
And there you are
Happy pills that fly under the radar.
Meds, surgeries, out patient procedures can be had after waiting 2 weeks for a delivery except if you sign up for Prime membership. Then it’s either a 1 or 2 day shipping wait. The drones will be very efficient.
…drone dispensed suppositories.
…hookers and blow available SAME DAY DELIVERY!!!