Straight Line of the Day: Scientists Think There Might Be Life On Mars Because…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Scientists think there might be life on Mars because…

52 Comments

  1. Scientists think there might be life on Mars because…

    scientists do a lot of thinking. Most of it consists of “Will this get me laid?” Unfortunately, this won’t but it will buy them some free face time on the Science Channel.

  2. …men don’t just grow on trees ya know. Well, they do, but the trees are on Mars.

    …the little green man on the moon told them so.

    …there are no guns there to kill everything.

    …their world needs ditch diggers too.

    …the lander keeps sending back recordings of a gruffly voiced Keep off my lawn!!!

  3. Scientists think there might be life on Mars because…

    anonymous sources, highly placed but not authorized to speak publicly, told them that they can reliably relate information that was related to them by sources familiar with Mars but not currently on Mars that there is proof of life and it is being held by certain sources who cannot divulge it because it would reveal FBI sources and methods. Or so I am told.

  4. …The Clinton campaign paid Christopher Steele to talk to Russian agents who informed him, which he put it in the dossier, that was then vetted by Peter Strzok and doodled on by James Comey, so you know it’s got to be true. -Also, Trump had an affair with the three-boobed martian woman from Total Recall.

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