…Remember that last time you used the transporter? I am not sure exactly the best way to say this, um…. Well, laddie, have you ever heard of Seth Brundle?
Sure. Captain….Starfleet Command tried to get us from using Dilithium crystals..” for the environment”, substituting Difentanyl crystals..but Captain it is just making our systems lethargic, smoking more and its going to kill the warp drives…
“Captain, some prankster put red dye in the washing machine. Our life insurance policies have all been cancelled. Bones saw the profit potential and is now saying, ‘I’m a funeral director, not a doctor.’ The transporter is broken because some idiot casting director hired Stacey Abrams. Begorrah.”
How did he find out about my stash of Lagavulin?
…”I’m giving her all she can handle captain.”
Kirk: “I told you to stay away from Sulu you crazy kilt wearing Scottsman”!
“I kinna help you, Captain, we’re all phased on Romulan ale right now, and for the foreseeable future…”
It’s the control center for flight operations, but that isn’t important right now…
“One to Jim Beam, I mean, beam, Jim…”
Scotty Calls You on the Bridge With an Urgent Message — What … Is It?
Some ‘un carjacked the Beemer.
…Remember that last time you used the transporter? I am not sure exactly the best way to say this, um…. Well, laddie, have you ever heard of Seth Brundle?
Is there a warranty on our ship?
Sure. Captain….Starfleet Command tried to get us from using Dilithium crystals..” for the environment”, substituting Difentanyl crystals..but Captain it is just making our systems lethargic, smoking more and its going to kill the warp drives…
Scotty Calls You on the Bridge With an Urgent Message — What … Is It?
“We’re outta Scotch!”
Sir, Sulu and Uhura were racing for the same transporter and somethings got mixed up during the move. Sulu is a little, um, confused now.
So he’s straight?
“Captain, some prankster put red dye in the washing machine. Our life insurance policies have all been cancelled. Bones saw the profit potential and is now saying, ‘I’m a funeral director, not a doctor.’ The transporter is broken because some idiot casting director hired Stacey Abrams. Begorrah.”